On "the Ramparts We Watched"
STRAIGHT, TESTICLES
A young U.S. Army officer is grievously and unusually wounded in the War of 1812.
(A letter from Capt. Jonathan Hasbrough, United States Army, to his father to
his father, Nathaniel Hasbrough of Boston, Massachusetts )  
  
Baltimore, Maryland,  
September 28, 1814  
  
Dear Father,  
Doubtless, by now you have received tidings of the siege of Fort McHenry, and
knowing that I am stationed there, have been concerned for my welfare. And
well you might be, for I have been greivously wounded in a rather bizarre
fashion.  
I am one of very few living men who can claim to have survived being struck by
a cannon-ball. During the battle of Fort McHenry, on the evening of September
13, I was standing on one of the ramparts of Fort McHenry, surveying the
British fleet and the progress of the battle through a telescope.  
Suddenly, from the nearest British vessel, there was a loud report,
immediately following which I felt excruciating pain in my private parts. I
cried out, at least as much in surprise as in pain, and was thrown backward
into the arms of one of my men who was standing below and witnessed my
wounding.  
A four-pound cannon ball, which is about 3 1/3 inches in diameter, had passed
between my thighs, carrying away my stones.By great good fortune, it missed my
yard by the minutest fraction of an inch, not that that member is now of any
use to me, deprived of those manly glands which alone made it worthy to be
called virile.  
Prompt medical attention saved my life, to what purpose remains to be seen. Of
course, I was and am appalled and dismayed at my loss. I am especially sorry
to deny you the joy of having grandchildren. Except in that respect, however,
I think that I can safely say that my health is otherwise unimpaired.  
My commanding officer is of the opinion that I should be honorably discharged
from the Army as disabled. I have begged respectfully to differ with him in
this matter. I told him "This is, Sir, a mere flesh wound. Precious flesh
admittedly, but I have lost nothing necessary to life and health. Combat does
not require a man to use his generative powers. My ability to defend my
country is unaffected." Admiring my spirit, he has agreed to allow me to
return to my duties at the end of this week.  
Thus, if it be my destiny to give my life for my country, it can be under
honorable , perhaps even, if I may allow myself the word, heroic circumstances
. Deprived of that which gives his life joy and meaning, a man loses his fear
of death. In the words of the old Lutheran chorale, _"Komm' suesser Tod_."  
Please give my love to Mother and my dear sister, Anne.  
  
Your Loving Son,  
Jonathan  

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