Future Surgeon
NULLIFICATION
What will the future be like? Here's a view.
The surgeon, a very old man with a slight bend to his back,
shuffled into the white-walled operating room.  He wore a white
cotton, quilted tunic that buttoned on one side with loops around
the buttons, loose white pants, and a fashionable pair of white
sneakers.  The top of his head was a pink, shiny dome with the
occasional "age spot" here and there.  His pure white hair flowed
out around his head, in a careless, wispy fashion.  He shuffled
over to the bedside of a man lying on an ordinary looking hospital
bed, with a white sheet pulled up to his neck.  The man looked at
him as if he was confused.
The surgeon spoke, "Good morning Mr. Sprague.  I see you've
had your anesthetic.  Everything is all set, you're going to be fine,
Sir.  Let's get started.  Remove the sheet from the patient.  Now,
let's have a look at your arm.  One, two, three hard bumps under
the skin; all your medication is in place.  Good.  Your genital
region has been thoroughly depilated.  That's good.  Let's have
the leg supports in place bedside, that's right.  Be sure they're
locked securely.  Good.  Ready to lift his legs?  All right then, lift
up, and over, right over now.  You will experience some
discomfort, Sir, as you are bent back.  That's right, bend him
back, legs right over the top of his head.  Take that pillow out
from under his head now.  Careful with his neck.  All right, he's
fine that way.  Secure his legs down in the supports.  Make those
straps snug now, he may struggle reflexively a bit when we begin
cutting . . . and how are you Sir?  Don't try to speak, the
anesthetic won't let you sound intelligible anyway.  It's funny that
way.  The position may seem awkward to you, and even
dangerous or frightening, but we' ve neutered thousands of
fellows in this position, and we've found that it actually improves
their spinal health.  I hope you don't feel silly with your ass up in
the air like this, but we're all professionals here, and we'll do
away with your genitals much easier this way.  Hand me down
the hose.  Thank you.  You see Sir, this large, white hose that
runs up to the ceiling has all the surgical equipment inside it to do
the job.  This probe that extends down from the side of the hose,
goes into your anus to locate, and stabilize the hose, and helps to
monitor the operation.  You will feel it inflate inside you to keep
itself in place.  I'll start the probe into your anus . . . vacuum on
the hose now please.  Genitals entering the hose under suction,
probe entering the anus.  So much easier than years ago.  You
will feel the catheter entering your penis, Sir, the new anesthetic
only affects the sensation of pain itself, so you will feel everything
else.  There, all in.  Arm the machine please, and, activate --
now.  You'll feel a tug on your organs, Sir, as they come off. 
There, the indicator shows they're off . . . now cautery . . . cautery
. . . hmm, a bit more than I expected, but duly noted.  All done. 
Autoretract the hose please, and . . . perfect!  Perfect job. 
Catheter is flush with the wound, looks just right. 
Congratulations, Sir, you are now a full eunuch, and entitled to all
the tax and other priveleges thereof.  Congratulations!  Please be
sure to stop at billing on your way out, and have a nice day."