text: You decide to get the island. Its only $50! Someone attempts to buy it for $100, but you outbid them to a whopping $150. You begin to daydream about what’ll happen if you actually win the bid. You think about all the bad B-movies that take place on islands and how directors are always looking to use cheaper sets. You could rent it out for that, or possibly a cheap “island getaway” substitute for people that don’t want to spend that much on a vacation. You’ll have to check it out. It suddenly occurs to you that maybe people are already living on the island. Hey maybe the island will already have those topless island babes that you’ve seen in your “nature” magazine under your bed!
  
  You snap out of your day dream only to realize that you’ve won the bid! You clap you hands and dance around in celebration like a monkey on crack.
  
  Eventually you receive the exact location and make arrangements to go to the island. After a short trip to the ocean and a boat trip you are now on YOUR island. Time to explore!
  > You walk along the shore
  You walk along the shore, marveling at the fact this island is made completely out of Styrofoam and held together by hemp.
  
  In your wonder, you begin to inspect the hemp ropes which are holding the pieces of Styrofoam together.
  
  In your curiosity you begin to pick at a frayed rope…
  
  And in your stupidity, you’ve just unraveled the entire island!
  
  Well so much for renting this place, you attempt to paddle your way back to shore on a piece of Styrofoam, but you’re eaten by a very large seagull flying overhead.
  
  Fortunately it swallowed you whole, but its digestive juices are going to make quick work of you if you don’t do something to escape, so you figure fleeing through its asshole is the best way to do this.
  
  Fighting through the intestinal tract of the seagull to get to the “exit”, might sound like a novel idea, but it does have its consequences. First of all you’re a mile above the earth and over the water. So assuming you managed to survive the fall out of the bird’s rectum, you’d still have to contend with minor problem of drowning and sharks.
  
  Second, you’ve done quite a bit of damage to the bird itself by crawling around in it; in fact you’ve ruptured and punctured some vital organs. It’s dying and now falling at a terrific speed.
  > You jump out of the rectum and try to swim to land
  Well you jump out and survive the fall, and since you do know how to swim pretty well, you also survive the drowning.
  
  However you don’t survive the sharks…