The cons far outweigh the pros. You’ve found your niche by plying most of your trade at the university district. You’re staying out of the Talons way and more or less keeping a low profile from the militia. You see no good reason to change that.

You guess you’ll have to become more of a “salesman” of sorts if you steal anything that isn’t actual money though. You suppose the drugs you pilfer from the medical school won’t be too hard to get a good price for or find buyers. Maybe it’s time to branch out your skill set anyway. You are working on your own so you really need to be a jack-of-all-trades and try not to rely on outside sources. Especially since you still believe that the Crimson Talons are destined for nothing good in the future.

Thinking no more about it, you pack some of your tools in your bag and set off for the university.

Later…

After picking a few random pockets, you pass by one of the bulletin boards to see if there are any big parties being announced in the near future (or even tonight) since those are always usually profitable to attend.

You take note of a couple listed and then you see a notice for a job.

ATTENTION!

In need of two people to assist in gathering several eggs from a Creptian Blueshell. Location will most likely be in the shores north of Hessla.

Trip will be paid for and a reasonable monetary reward will be provided upon completion of the task.

Please see me in my office at the medical school for details if interested.

Dr. Gossey

While you’ve seen a few of these notices in the past since your last job with Dr. Gossey, you’ve actually been reluctant to try it again for several reasons, but you’re feeling a little adventurous. Might be good to get out of the city for a while anyway, because if that Zalmora woman comes around again to convince you to join, you might just be silly enough to do it.

You head over to the medical school and unlike last time you easily find Gossey’s office without getting lost. (Though you sort of know this place fairly well by now considering all the medical paraphernalia you’ve stolen from this place)

When you arrive, you find that she’s conveniently in her office. When she sees you she greets you warmly.

“Well, this is a surprise. I was wondering if we’d ever bump into each other again. I haven’t seen you since the last time you got those qweepas for me. I guess classes are keeping you busy?” Gossey asks.
“Yeah, I tend to study a lot, but anyway I’m here about the job posting.” You say.
“Oh good! I already got one person to help and since you did such a good job last time in acquiring the qweepas, I think I can safely hire you right away. Are you familiar with Creptain Blueshells?”
“Mm, not especially no.”
“Well they’re sort of like a cross between a snail and a crab, but about as big as a large dog. I mean they don’t move very fast and they aren’t usually overly aggressive in the scheme of things, but considering we need to take some eggs…well I can guarantee they aren’t going to be happy.”
“I see. I don’t suppose they sell these creatures as a delicacy in Hessla do they?”
“Oh no. They’re far too poisonous to most life forms for that. In fact beside their shells, that’s probably their number one defense. Don’t let them spit on you.”
“They spit?”
“Oh yes, but as I said, you’ll have extra help this time. A student from the magic college is coming on the trip, along with my assistant Kelium. Between the three of you, I don’t anticipate you’ll have any problems as long as you remain cautious.”
“Magic huh? Hmm, well that sounds like evening the odds a bit at least.”
“To be sure, but I know this still has its danger, so it will be fifty gold upon completion. I’d offer a little more, but the other student needs her payment too.”

Fifty gold pieces is a nice chunk to go towards your secret savings. And as far as the crab snails monsters go, the wizard can probably handle the heavy lifting what with the fireballs and lightning and such.

“Sounds reasonable. So when do we get going?” you ask.
“Well since we have you now, I suppose I can get the trip going in three days. I’ll explain to my assistant what you look like and you can just meet up with him at the carriage station in the morning. You’ll probably have to stay in Hessla for the night when you reach it, but from there you should travel north along the coast to seek out the Creptians, but don’t worry on that front, my assistant will have a map and I think you’ll find Kelium much more agreeable than the last time you worked one of these jobs.” Gossey remarks.
“Well that’s good to hear. Did Elana graduate then?” you ask.
“It’s the strangest thing. She never returned. I don’t really want to think about what might have happened to her, but that’s all in the past, and I’m sure you did your best in trying to convince her that staying in Hessla alone ran a risk. Oh well, all in the past. But right now, all you have to do is make sure you get some of Creptian eggs. That’s the most important thing.” Gossey remarks.

Having come to an agreement with Dr. Gossey and her explaining what Kelium looks like along with the magic student Yvette, you take your leave of the university and head back home.

Your next few days mainly consist of you preparing yourself for the trip. You pack your short sword, and a couple extra knives along with your flintlock. You also go and steal yourself some anti-venom from the apothecary. (Along with a few other items) You figure it can’t hurt.

Finally on the day you’re supposed to meet everyone, you go to the carriage station and seek out your companions for this trip.

Doesn’t take long when you see a tall pale man wearing a cap loading up a few bags on a carriage and near him is a shorter woman with light brown hair. You’re guessing that’s them. You also look at the driver and see that it isn’t Yrid.

“Hey, you’re Yvette and Kelium right?” you ask, and both of them turn to address you and confirm this question, then you announce who you are.

“That’s great. More people to talk with on the trip.” Kelium says easily hoisting another bag on top of the carriage with one arm.
“Hi.” Yvette says demurely.

Not exactly what you expected. Kelium seems like less like a scholar and more like an athletic type. And you were expecting Yvette to be dressed in a robe or something similar. Maybe even holding a staff or something. At least neither are dressed screaming of “Hey I’m rich, come rob and enslave me!” though.

All three of you pile into the carriage, which is already better than last time. You and Kelium sit on one side while Yvette sits on the other and you’re soon on your way.

Kelium talks for half of the trip and almost never shuts up. He goes on about his studies and how he’s been helping Dr. Gossey and what he plans to do when he graduates. It probably would all be very fascinating if you actually cared. Still, at least he’s pleasant enough and he’s talking so much about himself he doesn’t ask anything about you at all. You occasionally just give a general agreement with whatever he’s saying.

Yvette is quiet and is just mainly listening to Kelium. She doesn’t talk at all. Maybe wizards are just like that. All that isolated studying.

Eventually Kelium does shut up because he starts to get sleepy. He mentions that he was studying up on Blueshell Creptians all night just to be extra prepared. He then mentions for you two to wake him when you arrive in Hessla and soon he’s fast asleep complete with snoring.

You take this opportunity to sit over on the other side of the carriage.

“Um. What are you doing?” Yvette asks a bit suspiciously.
“I’m sitting over here, because that snoring giant over there is taking up most of the room, not to mention he’s loud enough even without being seated right next to him. I’d like to reach Hessla and not be deaf in one ear.” You explain.
“Oh. Okay then.” Yvette says and then gets over as far as she can when you sit down.
“You…don’t trust me do you?” you ask.
“Um…no, I mean yes. I mean um…” Yvette stutters.
“Hah. It’s okay. I understand being cautious, but I’m really not going to do anything, I mean you’re a wizard. I’m not risking getting a spell cast on me.”
“No! It’s not that! It’s just well…I’m not used to being cramped in a small space like this with a bunch of people. I like a lot of personal space.”
“Ah. Got it. Also understand. You want me to go back and sit over there?”
“No. It’s okay. You seem nice.”
“Thanks. Don’t hear that one often. So I’ve never met a wizard before. Tell me everything.”
“There isn’t much to tell and I’m not really a wizard. I’m still just an adept. I actually took this job as part of my own assignment of taking what I learned in the classroom and applying it to the field. I was sort of too nervous just to do it alone.”
“Well it is a scary world out there at times.”

You proceed to speak with Yvette for the rest of the trip who slowly starts to open up a bit. She goes on to tell you that the magic school isn’t even all that big. She’s only one of twenty-three students! Apparently the university is almost on the verge of closing it down since naturally magically talented individuals seem to be born less and less these days.

However, magic is still a mighty force in this world and one of the Klyton Council members is a mage himself (Though not a particularly powerful one), so the school remains open.

Just as you’re starting to get Yvette to laugh at your dumb goblin jokes, you’re arriving in Hessla and the driver stops.

“I guess we should wake up Kelium.” Yvette says.
“Yeah, I suppose so.” You reply a bit disappointed. You were starting to enjoy your personal time with Yvette.

While Yvette wakes him up, you get out to speak to the driver and ask him to take you to an inn that’s better than the Barnacle.

“And DON’T even fucking think about taking us to the Cozy Krak Inn!” you exclaim.
“Wasn’t going to sir. I’ve never even heard of the place. I was going to suggest going to the Sea Dog.”
“Is it a slavers den?”
“Um, no. It’s run by an old ex-pirate and is more or less friendlier than most inns.”
“It better be.” You say.

You get back in and see that Kelium is awake and the carriage soon takes you to your destination.

The Sea Dog is better than the Barnacle, but not by much. However, it at least isn’t trying to appear like something it isn’t. Kelium grabs all the supplies he packed, he doesn’t even ask for help.

The ex-pirate that the driver mentioned reminds you of Trobart from the Welcome Mat because as soon as you enter he’s glaring at you with his one good eye and asking what the hell you want.

While you would probably return the verbal abuse, Kelium takes it all in stride and simply pays for the rooms. Unfortunately only two are available. Naturally it’s decided that Yvette will take one room and you’ll have to share one with Kelium. Not looking forward to that mostly because the guy snores so loudly.

However as it turns out Kelium isn’t ready to go to sleep.

“I partially slept on the way here, so I’m wide awake! We should hang out and go find a proper tavern! Or better yet let’s go find a gambling house! Dr. Gossey gave me all this money for the trip; I bet I can fucking double it!” Kelium exclaims.
“But don’t you need to be alert for the trip north tomorrow?” you ask.
“I’ll be fine! Besides, we don’t have to leave first thing in the morning. Come on, let’s go have a little fun! This place has got to have less restrictions than Klyton!”
“I dunno, I really think you should just stay put and try to get some rest. I mean I haven’t slept so…”
“Come on man! You’re not one of those guys that studies all the time are you? I mean I figure you took a job like this because you’re an adventurous type! I mean yeah you got a job and I got an assignment, but shit, I ain’t never been to a different town before. I wanna explore the scenery a bit! Maybe we can get Yvette to join us too! I saw you checking her out! She’s a bit too quiet and bookish looking for me, but hey whatever you like man.”

On one hand you don’t really have anything against going out and spending someone else’s money and maybe having some fun, but you also don’t relish the idea of having to look after this fool because with his boisterousness you just know he’s going to get himself into a whole mess of trouble and you already got monster crab snails to deal with tomorrow and EVERYONE needs to be prepared for that shit.
> You talk him into staying
You can’t believe that you’re actually leaning towards being the “responsible” one here.

“Look, I get that this is all very exciting for you seeing as you’ve lived a sheltered rich life and all…”
“I am not rich or sheltered! My father has to bust his ass making my tuition payments!”
“…yeah…in any case. I’ve been to this town before and its reputation is well earned. There are people here that make the dregs of Klyton look like priests of Joachim and if you run afoul of them, it isn’t going to be good for you.”
“Pfft, I can handle trouble.” Kelium says and flexes his muscles a bit and pulls a sword out of his bag.
“Yeah, maybe you could handle one person, but the problem is these sort don’t travel alone, they ALWAYS travel in packs and I can honestly say that YOU are not going to handle five or even three by yourself.”
“Well wouldn’t you help me? I mean isn’t that why you’re here?”
“Your job or assignment is to get some monster crab eggs. MY job is to help you in that task. My job is NOT however looking after your ass while you look for fun or trouble. Now I suggest you get some rest which is what I’m going to do because giant snail monsters that spit poison sound like they need full attention.”

You fully expect Kelium to argue some more with you, but he doesn’t. You also expect him to just leave the room by himself, but he doesn’t do that either thankfully. He just says he thought you were going to be fun and starts reading through some of his papers.

Feeling a little pleased with yourself, you lay down on your bed and attempt to get to sleep before Kelium genuinely starts to get tired again, because if he starts snoring there is no way you’re going to get any sleep.

Much later, you groggily wake up and find that your speech was less effective than you thought.

Kelium is not in your room. In fact, it doesn’t even look like his bed has been slept in. You just shake your head and groan.

“Stupid fucker probably got himself enslaved or his throat cut.” you mutter, as you get yourself prepared to go look for this idiot.

The first stop you make is Yvette’s room.

“Hey Yvette.” You say knocking on the door.
“Um…yes?” she answers, but not opening the door.
“Is Kelium in there?”
“No, why would he be? What are you implying?”
“…what? Nothing! I’m just asking because he’s gone, and it doesn’t look like he’s slept in his bed either. I’m guessing he took off to have fun in the middle of the night.”
“Oh dear. Um…well hold on, I have to get ready. I’ll be out soon.” Yvette says.

You half wonder if Kelium is in there and he’s climbing out of a window. If that is the case, it’s going to be real obvious if he and Yvette slept together last night. You aren’t sure why Yvette would bother hiding it though; it isn’t like you really give a shit.

As it turns out however, that isn’t the case at all and you don’t even have far to go to find Kelium.

You find him just outside the Sea Dog, stripped nearly naked and lying unconscious by the street.

“Well, at least that’s one less thing to worry about.” You say to yourself and begin the undesirable task of dragging his ass back inside. It’s sometime at this point, Kelium begins to rouse from his unconsciousness.

In between the name-calling and laughter by the locals, you manage to get him back to the room where Yvette joins you both.

Kelium has a wicked hang over, but manages to explain what he remembers. He says that after you fell asleep he went out to explore the town and soon found himself in a card game at some place that he can’t remember the name of. He claims he was winning and also says that someone must have drugged his drink and robbed him of everything.

“I told you not to go out. You’re just lucky that getting robbed blind was all that happened to you.” You say.
“Yeah, yeah, fuck. You sound like some old bitch. Shit. My head. Alright fine. Just let me get my spare clothes, and we can go get these fucking eggs.” Kelium says.
“Wait, we’re going now? Are you in condition to do this? Maybe we should wait a day.” Yvette asks.
“I’ll be fucking fine! Besides, I just lost all my money. We can’t afford to stay here another night. We need to get these eggs today and then get the fuck outta this shitty town.”

You don’t even ask HOW you’re supposed to get back to Klyton if he’s lost all his money. Though you’ve brought a little with you, so you suppose you’ll be footing the carriage bill. Like Yvette, you aren’t sure if Kelium is in the best condition to go do this, but you’re certainly not going to be paying for more time at the inn either, so if he thinks he’s good to go, then you are too. Besides, you’re going to be happy when this is over with and you’re questioning why you ever decided to do this again.

“Adventurous…I should have that drunk Virgil check me for demonic possession.” You mutter.

After Kelium gets dressed and gathers his supplies (Which at least he’s carrying), the three of you set off on your journey to get these eggs. Unfortunately, its not just a simple matter of sticking to the coast and finding them along the shore, Kelium says you’ll probably have to go into a cave seeing as they like to lay their eggs some place dark, wet and safe.

“Um, we have to enter a cave?” Yvette asks.
“Yeah, what’s the big deal?” Kelium asks.

What Yvette doesn’t answer right away, you step in.

“I think Yvette is a bit uncomfortable with small spaces, especially dark ones crawling with monsters.” You say.
“Huh? Well that’s just tough because she signed up for this task voluntarily. Nobody held a flintlock to her head. Besides, it’s most likely a big open cave given how large blueshell creptians are.” Kelium remarks.
“Oh, well that changes everything.”

You travel a bit longer until you start climbing up a small hill. Kelium occasionally looks at the ground and tries to find signs of creptians. He seems to know what he’s doing, despite his condition, though at this point you’re more on the look out of other potential bad types like say bandits or something similar. Meanwhile Yvette looks like she’s expecting trouble everywhere since she’s looking around constantly.

“Yvette, calm yourself. Out of the three of us, you’ve probably got the most power here to deal with anything.” You say.
“I dunno what you think I can do. I know. I’m not some high mage like in the old stories. As I told you, I’m just starting out and I haven’t even been out of the city before.”
“Hm, so you can’t just summon a ball of flame or shoot lighting?”
“Um…well not what you’re probably thinking. I mean maybe I could conjure a small palm sized ball of flame. Not sure if that would take down a Blueshell Creptian though, and it takes all my focus just to do it.”
“Better than nothing I suppose.”

Suddenly you hear Kelium yelling about something. You were so busy speaking with Yvette you didn’t even notice Kelium disappeared…again.

“HEY COME HELP ME! SHIT!” Kelium shouts.

You and Yvette run over to the other side of the hill you were on and see Kelium with his sword in hand and scrambling for cover behind a rock. You also see what you can only guess is a blueshell creptian. It looks exactly how you pictured. A big snail, with big crab like claws and a blue shell.

Nearby the creptian you see a large sloping hole in the ground, you can only imagine that’s where it has made its home.

“HEY! MOVE IN MAN! ATTACK!” You hear Kelium shout as a glob of blueshell spit hits the rock he’s hiding behind.

You pull out your flintlock and fire at the blueshell and find that the shot doesn’t even penetrate its hard shell. In fact it doesn’t even turn its attention to you, so far it’s just slowly crawling over to Kelium’s position.

“Yvette, can you cast some sort of light spell or cause something to glow?” you ask.
“Yeah, but how is that going to help?” Yvette says.
“It’ll help me search that cave for the eggs while it’s distracted.”
“Wait, you’re going in there alone? What happens if there’s another one in there?”
“Well, I’ll be running out of there really quick I guess. You just try to distract that blueshell and when I get the eggs we can all get the hell out of here.”
“I dunno, I think maybe we should try to work together to kill the blueshell, then deal with the cave.”
“And I don’t think we’re going to be able to, or at least not with what we got. Look, I’m going to be as quick as I can. All you have to do is stay away from that thing and find some cover. It doesn’t move that fast.”
“I dunno…”

Obviously Yvette has some doubt about this plan and if she does there’s a chance she could panic, but you really don’t have confidence in her plan either especially since it means you’d have to get closer or at least aim for a place that isn’t armor plated.
> You proceed with your plan
It might seem slightly cowardly on your part, but you’re not a damn massive warrior, you sneak about and steal shit. You’re playing to your real strengths, which isn’t going head to head with some big ass armored monster.

“Yvette, look this is going to work. I’ll go grab the eggs and you just try to help Kelium. And if shit starts getting too much for you, I want you to just run back to Hessla. There is no damn point in all of us dying.”
“But…”
“But nothing, you just have to trust me on this. I’ll be fine, I just need to see in that cave, so cast whatever spell you need to, to make that happen.”

Yvette is reluctant, but your words and the urgency of the situation causes her to comply. She says some sort of weird shit and moves her hands about and then suddenly a little ball of light appears in front of you.

“That will follow you around and should last quite awhile, but you still need to hurry!” Yvette exclaims and then starts casting another spell.

You don’t waste any time running down towards the blueshell lair. The creature still doesn’t notice you, but you certainly hear Kelium shouting at you about what you think you’re doing.

You enter the blueshell dwelling and your boots are immediately covered in some sort of slime that the monster no doubt left. It smells pretty bad in here, but it isn’t like the stench of something rotten, it’s more like a strong chemical smell that burns your nostrils.

The deeper you go, the more slime there is and the stronger the smell, you’re practically gagging at this point. Whether there is another blueshell in here or not isn’t going to matter much longer because you’re about to leave before you become overwhelmed by just the smell.

Then that’s when you get lucky and spot something that you guess are eggs. They look oval shaped and seem to have a hard shell so that’s good enough for you. You grab as many as you can and shove them into your bag. You’re really going to have to bathe after this.

With the eggs in the bag you run out of this foul cave as quick as you can partially vomiting the whole time. In fact you actually start to feel like you’re going to pass out and that’s when you start to wonder if this slime on your hands from the eggs isn’t also poisonous. You wipe them as much as you can on your clothing and soldier on. Just as the little ball of light that’s following you starts to go out, you see the light of the outside and then you also see a sizable fire and smoke. You were so busy with your task, you sort of blocked out the distant sounds of the battle outside.

Upon exiting the cave, the smell hasn’t improved, though now charred crepitan flesh is filling the air. Small fires burn on the sparse grass and you see the burning carcass of the creptian. Whatever power Yvette didn’t think she was capable of she was clearly wrong.

You hear some sobbing which you can only guess is her, you follow the sound and see her sitting on the ground with her face in her hands.

“Yvette? What…What’s going on? I certainly hope you aren’t crying because killed that thing.” You say.
“No! (sob) I’m crying because I didn’t kill it quick enough! Look over there!” Yvette shouts and points to a body not lying too far away.

You walk over and see Kelium and he’s completely blue. He was hit face first with the spit (He’s got translucent blue goo all over his head) and whatever happened afterwards obviously took effect immediately. His face is twisted in a manner that its very apparent his death was pretty painful.

Still feeling a bit sick yourself, you quickly take some of the anti-venom you bought. You just hope it helps and you aren’t slowly dying. You go back over to Yvette who is still upset.

“Yvette, it’s bad what happened, but it really isn’t your fault. I mean this was a dangerous job, any one of us could have died. I mean you killed the beast which means you have more power than you thought you did, that should count for something right?” you say.
“But what about Kelium? I mean we were supposed to keep him safe! What are we going to do?” Yvette answers.
“Okay, first off, you don’t even need to worry about it. I know how to handle Dr. Gossey. I know it’s going to sound strange, but I don’t think she’s going to be as upset as you are. But I do have to ask, what exactly was your assignment?”
“Just to practice my magic in the field and report the results. They have a way to tell if I’m lying or not.”
“So we don’t need to cut off a piece of that burning crab snail as proof then?”
“No, but I’m wondering if I’ll get marked down for being the cause of someone’s death during my assignment.”
“Yvette, you need to put that guilt out of your mind. Seriously. Kelium’s death wasn’t your fault. It really wasn’t. To be honest, if Kelium hadn’t gone out and gotten himself wasted last night, this whole expedition might have gone a little more cautiously. Under the circumstances I’d say we did the best we could have done. Just tell them you tried to be the voice of reason. All of this has truth to it, you just have to know how to spin it and you have to believe it yourself.”
“I…dunno…I just wasn’t brought up that way…”
“Of course you weren’t, but there really isn’t a good reason why you should possibly suffer a lowered grade because other people fucked up right? Come on, let’s get back to Hessla, I’ll go over everything with you along with way there and on the way back to Klyton. I want to head over to the shoreline though and wash this slime off first though.”

You spend your remaining time with Yvette going over the fine art of “telling the truth.” Again, it’s silly to you anyway, because she REALLY didn’t do anything wrong and she’s just blaming herself. However, if it’s going to help calm her when she has to go before this magical lie detector then you don’t mind helping. Not like she deserves getting a bad grade.

By the time you’re taking the carriage ride back to Klyton, you’re feeling a little better. You guess you’re not dying of blueshell poison, then again it just got on your hands, you didn’t get a load of the stuff in your face like Kelium did.

At some point you fall asleep on the trip to Klyton and Yvette wakes you up when you arrive.

“Hey, wake up, we need to switch carriages to go to the university.” Yvette says.
“Huh? Wha? It’s night.” You say.
“Yes, but we should still get to the university a little after midnight. Should be enough time to get some sleep before seeing Dr. Gossey. Of course I also have to go before my professor to give my report too. What’s on your agenda?”
“Um…nothing. No classes. In fact I’m not heading to the university.”
“Wait you don’t live on campus?”
“Me? Nah, I prefer keeping my personal life and school a bit separate in that regard.”
“Oh. I see. Where do you live?”
“It’s nowhere special really…so hey I have an idea, why don’t you just worry about your wizard report tomorrow. Like I said, I’ll go see Dr. Gossey and talk to her about what happened. I’ve worked for her before and I know exactly what to say, she’ll understand, trust me.”
“I’m still nervous about the report.”
“You’ll do fine. Just keep in mind what I said. You didn’t do anything wrong and have nothing to feel guilty about.”

You aren’t sure what else to do to alleviate her fears, so you just go for it and kiss her on the lips before she can even do anything about it. She’s in shock and pushes you back.

“Wha…what?! Why’d you do that for?!” she exclaims.
“I dunno. I like you…and you still seemed to be worried so I did the only thing I could think of that calm you.”
“Seriously?! That’s what you thought? You think I’m just some empty headed damsel that’s going to fall for all the honeyed words you’ve been telling me since we’ve been on this trip? I know how you’ve been looking at me; I’m not stupid you know! In fact you’re right this ISN’T my fault! It’s YOURS! If we had worked together as a team, Kelium might very well have lived!”
“Oh fuck…forget it. I’m sorry, don’t turn me into a toad.”
“I don’t need to, you obviously already have the manners of one!”
“…Okay…I’m just gonna leave. Good luck on your report.” You say and just take you leave before Yvette can continue yelling at you.

Well that could have gone better. You just couldn’t help it though; you thought her whole modest demeanor was cute and alluring, probably because you don’t encounter many girls like that. Maybe it was for the best though, not like you would have had much of a future with a girl like that.

In any case, you’re going home with a bag of slimy monsters eggs. You push Virgil out of the way when you get to the Welcome Mat.

“I’m in no mood, you fucking drunk.” You say and slam the door behind you.
“Sheesh, you’re very emotional.” You hear him retort.

You collapse on the bed and sleep. (At some point in the night, Elana curls up by your feet.)

Later…

You wake up and immediately make your way to the university. You sort of hope you don’t bump into Yvette, because you’d rather not get into that mess again.

After an uneventful trip, you get to Dr. Gossey’s office where you see her writing something out.

“Hey, that was quicker than I thought! I trust you have the eggs in that bag?”
“Yep, but careful, they still got some of that poisonous slime on them, you can just take the whole bag. No way I’m getting that clean again.” You say and place it on a table.
“Not surprised. Hope you didn’t get sick…but I guess if you’re here then you must have had the forethought to prepare yourself. Um…where is my assistant and the other one?”
“Oh, Yvette had to give a report to her wizard professors, but I’m sure she’ll show up here later to collect her coin. As for Kelium…well…”
“(Sigh) Damn. I guess I should ask how it happened.”
“I don’t want to speak ill of the dead…but he wasn’t exactly careful. I tried to tell him not to directly attack the blueshell and that the eggs were good enough, but he really wanted to impress you by bringing back one alive. He didn’t really think that out however and well to make a long story short, he got himself killed and if it hadn’t been for Yvette’s magic, I probably would have died too. It was terrible.”

Dr. Gossey shakes her head.

“Sounds like Kelium. He always was eager to impress and please. I always told him safety should always take priority. Certainly a loss, but at least you got the eggs, that’s the most important thing.”

And of course just like you figured, Gossey’s concern was more about the goal than the lives involved in it. You take your fifty gold and once again leave a bit richer.

You know exactly how you’re going to spend some of it too. You leave the university and head to Madam Moonlight’s place.

“Haven’t seen you in awhile, will you be having your usual?” the elven madam asks.
“Um, no not today. Got kind of a special request this time.” You answer.
“Well if you got the coin and it doesn’t involve killing someone, we can probably accommodate.”

You explain in some detail about what you want exactly and the madam says that’s a simple request and thought you were going to ask for something elaborate like an orc hermaphrodite to shit and piss on you while you sucked a centaur cock.

“What?! NO! That’s disgusting! Why the hell would anyone want that?!” you exclaim.
“You’d be surprised, we cater to all types here. Don’t judge.” Moonlight scolds.
“Look whatever, just set me up and no horse cocks or shitting orc freaks!”

After a few minutes the Moonlight comes back to take you to your girl. You enter the room and see a short woman with light brown hair dressed in a robe.

“Hello, I’m Yana and I need you to help me complete my spell ritual. I need your wand in my magic circle…” The woman says while seductively walking over to you.
“(Sigh) NO. Your name is Yvette and you’re shy. Not some fucking aggressive trollop! Got it?” you order.
“Okay okay, got it! Sheesh, you’re very emotional.”
“Yeah, so I’ve heard.”
> You time passes...
Year 25

“Look, I dunno anything about what that old bastard does in his spare time, I just pay my rent and mind my own business.” You say.

The militiamen give you a look like they don’t quite believe you.

“Just an innocent in all this eh? Bullshit. Trobart says you’re a rogue through and through.” One of them remarks.
“Yeah, and one of your neighbors, Randi I believe? She says you even have ties to the Crimson Talons.” Another adds.

You nearly want to laugh, but you resist since you don’t want to piss off the militia unnecessarily.

“Really? You’re going to believe a whore and some guy that sells alcohol illegally in his basement? They’re just trying to save their own asses by making false accusations! You turned my room upside down and didn’t find ANY stolen goods. And if I was a Crimson Talon, do you really think I’d be living in the shithole that I’m currently living in?” you answer.
“Didn’t say you were a Crimson Talon, just said you had ties to them. And if you think just because we didn’t catch you with anything that you’re off the hook. You deny that you’re a criminal, but as I said, it’s obvious that you have no visible means of support, so you have to be doing something illegal.” A militia officer says.
“How do you know I don’t have a proper job? You’re just making baseless assumptions.”
“Am I now? I don’t think so. I think it’s obvious that you’re just some second rate pissant sneak thief that is so pathetic at your own lowly trade that you managed to avoid our eye for so long. In fact I can imagine you probably TRIED to join the Crimson Talons, but they just kept you on as an associate bitch because you weren’t good enough to be a real member.”
“Interesting theory. Is this going somewhere?”
“YOU’RE going to be going somewhere if you don’t shut the fuck up and listen closely to my offer!” the militia officer exclaims, getting in your face.

You sit back in your chair and remain silent. The militia officer continues to stare at you assessing your every tell your face might be giving off.

“It’s like this criminal scum. You’re on our fucking list now. I’ve got your name, I’ve got your ass. Your best bet would be to just get the fuck out of this city, but I know you. You probably think you’re smarter than me. Well you ain’t and you’re gonna get caught. Maybe not now. Maybe not even next year, but you WILL fuck up. And when you do, I’m going to make sure they put you in the smallest hanging cage we got. Believe that.”

The militia officer then pulls back a bit and adopts a less combative stance along with a calmer voice.

“Now, all that being said…we do have bigger fish to catch and if you did… say have ties to the Crimson Talons then MAYBE you might know where their hideout is. If you helped us with something like that, then well maybe I might be inclined to not keep such a close eye on you.”

Well it’s times like these that make being a criminal not so much fun, though honestly as the years have been going on, you’re starting to wonder why you ever thought it was fun in the first place.

You haven’t really much contact with the Crimson Talons since Zalmora visited you that one day asking you to join. All you did hear is that Tom isn’t in charge anymore and was killed by one of the more aggressive members who took over. Word says he’s a real tyrannical asshole, which might explain why none of the Talon members that have gotten arrested haven’t actually ratted on him themselves.

It also explains when you have bumped into a couple of their members randomly in the taverns, they’ve been less than friendly and warned you to stay out of their territory. (Which you most certainly have been doing for years now)

You do know that their headquarters is still in the same location. You don’t know why the militia doesn’t know where it is though given how they’ve increased their own activity as of late. The militia can be remarkably blind at times.

“Look, if I did have dealings with the Crimson Talons, I’d help you out, but I just don’t associate with such people. Apologies.” You say.

The militia officer doesn’t look pleased by your answer, and you sort of wonder if he’s going to end up throwing you in jail anyway, but he lets you go.

“Okay then, but remember I gave you an out today and you turned it down. Be seeing you soon criminal.”

You get up from the chair you’ve been sitting on for who knows how long and walk out the door, though not before one of the militia shoves the back of your head. It’s frustrating, but any dealing with the militia that you walk away from is a victory.

From the militia barracks you make your way back to the Welcome Mat, which is practically destroyed at this point. At least it is on the inside. The law-abiding inhabitants (Or at least the criminal ones that didn’t get caught) are busily trying to gather and clean up the mess the militia made of their homes. You imagine Trobart, even with his ratting bullshit on you isn’t going to be able to keep this place any longer.

You enter your own ruined room where upon Elana comes out from whatever hole in the wall she was hiding in and squeaks at you.

“Hey Elana, glad to see they didn’t get you girl. Now let’s hope they didn’t get anything else either.”

You find a chair that wasn’t destroyed and check the hiding spot you have in the ceiling of your room. After checking and pulling out your small locked container you breathe a sigh of relief. Your small savings are still intact.

You’ll be needing it too, because everything else was taken. Your weapons, your tools, everything that you use or need in your profession. Granted it wasn’t a lot, but it’s still a loss. You’ll also be needing to find a new place to live.

As you’re pondering your next move, your door with the broken lock opens up. It’s Virgil and he appears to be sober for a change.

“Damn, they really did a number on yer room too I see.” Virgil says.
“Yeah, but it’s still my fucking room. What the hell do you want, I don’t have any money so you can go get drunk.” you say.
“And I wasn’t askin’. Sheesh, I was just coming in here to see if you were around. I wanted to apologize for bothering you all the time for money actually.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah…I mean I dunno if you noticed but I haven’t been around as much lately.”
“Hmm, I did notice a reduction in our usual encounters over the past month.”
“I’ve been trying to get my life back together. Get myself right with Joachim again. Part of that is me apologizing and trying to make amends for all the times I bothered you.”
“Oh yeah? You got a bag full of coins for all the times I gave you money for booze?”
“No. I wish I did. I know how you like money…I might even give you a lecture about that, but I’m not really in any position to do so. I first need to get myself right with Joachim and then I might be able to guide others into his light like I was supposed to be doing in the first place.”
“Not sure if you preaching at me is any better than you hitting me up for booze money.”
“I’m sure to you it isn’t, but I’m here to apologize anyway and if there is something within my power to help you, just let me know.”
“Well, thanks I suppose. Can’t really think of anything I need from you though, unless you got an idea of a new cheap place to live at that isn’t completely a shithole.”
“Not really, unless you want to sleep in one of the poor rooms at the Church of Joachim. That’s sort of where I’ve been staying lately. Would have been living there before, if I hadn’t gotten asked to leave for my...weakness. Guess I might be living there for good now. Just as well. It was time to move on.”
“Don’t think that’s going to work out for me, but thanks for the offer.”

Virgil nods and then says something about Joachim’s blessing be upon you.

You finish packing up and when you’re only a few steps away from the Welcome Mat, it suddenly occurs to you. Your family’s old inn. It’s still abandoned. You could easily stay there and that would at least save you some of the costs.

“Should have thought about that in the first place.” You say and make your way to the inn. Of course as you begin to do so, you realize you’re being followed. That officer wasn’t fucking around when he said he was going to have eyes on you all the time.

It takes some time, but you end up losing them, but now you’re practically on the other side of the city! If this is how it’s always going to be, it’s not going to matter where you stay.

Maybe it is time to leave Klyton, which you suppose you don’t mind since things haven’t been the greatest here, but you just hate being chased off like this.

Of course there’s always the option the officer suggested.

You don’t really have any loyalty to the Talons, so if it did help you out in the long run, well it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. It might even help you with less competition around that is actually making it harder for everyone else. Ever since the change in leadership, the Talons have also been selling Yellow Devil which has been causing a bit of a minor crime wave, what with all the extra junkies running around causing problems. (Even at your stomping grounds, the University)

Of course being a rat is a pretty damn serious offense in the criminal world (Even if it goes on all the time) and if the Crimson Talons ever did find out, it probably wouldn’t go well for you.
> You leave Klyton
You’re a lot of things, but you ain’t no rat. Besides, it isn’t like it’s going to make a difference anyway except maybe getting yourself killed if word got out.

Your best bet is to seek greener pastures so to speak. Without another thought you make your way to the carriage station.

Holgard comes to mind, but there's always some sort of rebellion or power struggle going on there. You'd rather not have to deal with being in the middle of that mess. The Delantium Kingdom is at war with some other nation, so you'd rather avoid the possibility of suddenly getting press ganged or conscripted into military service.

The only other place is Hessla, which at least you’re somewhat familiar with. The trip to Hessla is uneventful and when you arrive the same power structure is in place. Tolen is still the governor and his Headsmen provide the order. At least some things remain consistent.

After spending a few days in Hessla you realize you’re going to have to find some more reliable way of earning coin because thievery here is too high risk with low reward. Most people here aren’t exactly rolling in coins. Shops are always well protected so is anyone who does have a lot. At best you might get a pirate that’s flush with ill gotten loot, but you’d probably have to get one right off the ship because they spend it like water.

Not to mention the Headsmen are probably more vicious than the militia. They might not be as observant, but they don’t need to be. Unlike you, folks here tend to have no qualms about ratting out thieves where upon the Headsmen deal out swift justice.

You need to find something suited to your skills.

The first thing that comes to mind is piracy given that you’re here in the heart of it. Granted you’re no sailor and you have little knowledge on what exactly is involved, but it is something you imagine your trade might come in handy.

Not really knowing how this is done, you head to one of the docks looking for work.

First one you try is a big dark skinned bald man who is standing by a large ship with several cannons mounted in it. He looks intimidating, and seems more surprised that you even approached him rather than annoyed.

“Um, you lost landlubber?” he asks.
“Landlubber?” you respond.
“Yeah, that’s definitely you. You ain’t a sailor and you sure as hell aren’t a pirate.”
“That obvious?”
“Given that you even approached me, you might as well be wearing a sign. So whadda ya want?”
“I want to be a pirate.”

The man stares at you in disbelief for a moment and looks you up and down before laughing heartily.

“Aren’t you a little old to be having dreams of running away to be a pirate? Get the fuck outta here.” The man says.
“I’m not that old, I’m probably younger than you. And what difference does it make how old I am?”
“Because this here is the Dominator and as I already pointed out, you’re no sailor and we ain’t got time to train you and you’re not nearly young enough to act as a tag along cabin boy. The pirate shit is easy. Any thug off the street could be one. But bein’ a sailor? THAT’S the hard part.”
“Are you the captain of this ship then?”
“Oh no. I’m Zamed, the first mate. The captain of this fine vessel is Captain Illam and he’s less tolerant than I am so you’re not going to see him at all.”
“I have skills! I can fight! I mean I’m an accomplished thief! I’m very stealthy! I can pick almost any lock…ANY lock if given enough time!”
“Yeah…that’s not really helping you. Last thing we need is someone on our ship potentially sneaking around and pilfering hard earned loot. And as for yer fighting skills, I doubt if you were doing too much of that if you were sneaking about. I’d wager you wouldn’t be much good in a boarding action or a coastal raid. You even know what its like to be in a real fight and so close to a man that when you stick your blade into him that you can smell death upon him?” Zamed says getting in your face and staring you down.

“Actually I do.” You say staring up at Zamed.

Zamed continues to study you and then slowly moves back to his original position.

“Okay…so maybe you might qualify in that regard, but that still doesn’t mean shit. As I said, we only take on skilled sailors and I KNOW you aren’t one of those.”
“But how am I going to learn how to be a sailor if I don’t get any on experience?”
“That’s your problem, not mine.”
“Bah, this is bullshit.” You say and start to walk away, but Zamed calls to you.

“Look, I don’t normally do this, but since you even had the balls to approach me I’ll help you out. You see those docks over there? Go over to that ship and ask if they’re looking for any new crew. The captain has lower standards on his ship, he might accept you.” Zamed says.
“That big one over there?”
“Hah. No, that one is Captain Yan’s vessel, and you’re not getting on that one. She only accepts women. You want the smaller one. The Steadfast run by Captain Rifiv.”
“Figures.”
“Hey, that’s your best shot if you’re serious about this life. Besides, don’t let the looks fool you. It’s not called the Steadfast for nothing. Rifiv might be well past his prime, but back in his day he was nothing to sneeze at. He’s probably lived longer than most his contemporaries. Anyway good luck I guess.”

You leave Zamed and head to the Steadfast. If this doesn’t work out, you aren’t sure what you’re going to do next.

When you get near the vessel, you see a group milling around it just talking with each other. Several of them notice you approach and one addresses you.

“Looking for something?” a scruffy man wearing a rag on his head asks.
“This is the Steadfast right? I want to join the crew.” You say.

They all look at each other and then the scruffy man addresses you again.

“You got any skills?” he asks.

You go on about your abilities the same way you did to Zamed. They don’t look too impressed either, but they don’t look disappointed either.

“Hmm, well we’ve certainly had less skilled people on this vessel. We weren’t actively looking for anyone new though. However, the captain doesn’t tend to mind a few extra hands, so you might get lucky. Come on, let me just go take you to him. The name’s Scully by the way.”

You follow Scully up the gangplank and wait as he knocks on the door of what you guess is the captain’s cabin. He gets an answer to come in and after a couple minutes, Scully comes back out and tell you to come in as well.

That’s when you meet this Captain Rifiv. He's practically an old man who is having a hard time walking with a cane. He's dressed better than everyone else on the ship, but that isn't saying much since even his fancy overcoat has patches sewn on it.

“So Scully says you want to join up. Also tells me your primary background was as a small time thief in Klyton and you have NO experience on the sea at all. That correct?” Captain Rifiv says.
“Yes.” You answer.
“While the premise is still in the same family of taking other people’s shit, you do realize being a pirate is a lot different than what you’re used to right?”
“I do, but I’m willing to learn.”
“Better learn quickly then, because if you fall behind or I don’t think you’re pulling your weight then I’ll have you chopped up and thrown overboard for mermaid food. Understand?”
“Clearly.”
“Okay, we’ll see then. Scully show him where he’ll be sleeping and everything else. And after you’re finished doing that, gather the rest of the men because we’re going to be setting off soon.”

Well time to see if you’re cut out for this line of work.
> You time passes...
Year 28

When you joined three years ago, you figured it would be a couple months maybe. You didn't know how far away all these places you're raiding were going to be, let alone how long it would be before you returned home.

The raids themselves aren’t exactly fun for you either. You realize you’re really not the bloodthirsty type who gets off on killing folks all the time. There’s been a lot of times you’ve hung back just so you can avoid most of the direct combat.

And that’s starting to getting a bit noticeable mainly because enough of the crew has died that it can’t afford to have any slackers. Fortunately Captain Rifiv hasn’t called you out on it and it’s just been a few of the crew bitching at you.

This isn’t even counting the rape and there’s a lot of that you haven’t been engaging in either. Though some of them seem content on buggering each other. (And no matter how long you've been at sea, you can honestly say there's nothing that would even make you THINK about sticking it to any of this loathsome lot you're with!)

The only minor upside is you’ve been doing okay as far as loot is concerned. These idiots haven’t been paying attention that you’ve been pilfering the odd coins or baubles from them so you actually have more than your share. However, you aren’t exactly doing all that much better than you were as a regular thief though and worse, you’re stuck at sea most of the time so you can’t even enjoy it like you’d prefer.

There’s also the fact that you've learned your way around a ship a lot more, though you question if this knowledge would actually ever be useful since you’re having serious doubts about ever setting foot on another ship ever again.

Currently you’re somewhere in the far southwest seas at some small port town called Gix. The Steadfast has been using the place as a rest stop in between raids mainly because it’s the only civilized place in this area that is accepting of pirates and has been for as long as anyone can remember.

This place isn’t Hessla though and isn’t a “criminal town.” It’s just run by normal people going about their simple normal lives. The locals are a bit live and let live for the most part. They don’t particularly enjoy having violent drunken pirates visiting, but as long as the pirates aren’t messing with them, they’re fine with accommodating them.

Sort of reminds you of how Teckleville used to turn a blind eye to you and your sister robbing travelling merchants.

You miss those days and not even the robbing part. You find that you’re missing home in general. Maybe not even home so much you miss the environment as strange as that might seem. Then again, you never had the wanderlust that your sister had. (You imagine other than the killing and rape, she’d find all this pirate stuff pretty exciting) Had things been different you probably would have never left Teckleville.

Maybe you would have eventually settled down and become boring like everyone else in that town. At this point that doesn’t seem all that bad. You guess you’re just realizing that you’re starting to get tired of this life.

Since you’re hanging out with the Steadfast crew most of the time, you always take the opportunity to stay away from the lot of them when in town. Instead of drinking at the “pirate bar” of the town, you drink at the quieter one that the locals seem to prefer.

The first time you entered you got a lot of strange looks, but now nobody bats an eye. You’re just minding your business after all. Still, occasionally the barmaid speaks to you and is fairly cordial. Seems to be in a more talkative mood today…

“Another successful voyage of raiding and pillaging?” Ola asks.
“I suppose so. Got enough money to spend here.” You answer.
“Drinking does seem to be one of the more civilized favorite past times of you lot. Good thing of course since we’d have significantly less coin coming into the town. Sort of wondering though, how come you always come in here rather than going to the usual taverns?”
“Because I have to spend practically all my time around those assholes, so the moment I actually don’t have to is a blessing.”
“If you don’t like the folks you sail with, why do it?”
“Good question, and one I’ve been asking myself more and more each day before finally coming to the inevitable conclusion.”
“Which is?”
“That this pirate life isn’t for me. As soon as we get back to Hessla, I’m not setting foot on a ship again. (Sigh) Another year at sea though before we return…ugh…I just dunno if I can take it.”
“Well, why not just leave now?”
“…hmmm…I suppose I could…I doubt if they’d come looking for me. Do you have any transport ships that go to Hessla?”

Ola frowns a bit.

“We don’t have ANY big ships. In case you haven’t realized, we’re a small town not a bustling trading city we hear you lot talk about. If it weren’t for pirates coming here, we probably would never have much contact with the rest of the world. I mean the best you could do is get yourself a rowboat and row to this Hessla place. How far is it?” Ola asks.
“Too far. I doubt if I could even make it to Jicol in a rowboat. Oh well, guess I can tough out another year.” You say.
“Why not just stay here?”
“Here? What would I do here?”
“Um, well you know your way around a ship right? You could work as a fisherman.”
“Ugh, trying to get away from boats actually. Still, sitting in a rowboat and peacefully fishing sounds a lot more attractive right now than what I am doing.”
“What are some of your other skills…um, I mean those that don’t involve killing and raping people.”
“First off, I’ve never raped anyone…” you start to say before Ola interrupts.
“You haven’t? Oh thank Kalhu!”

You give Ola a bit of a strange look. Granted you two don’t really know each other that well, but she seems way more talkative than she has in the past. If you didn’t know any better you’d say she was flirting with you in some strange way.

“Okay, first who is Kalhu?” you ask.
“The god of this island of course. All the times you’ve been here, you’ve never heard of him before?” Ola says.
“Don’t really pay much attention to religion. You’re not going to preach at me are you?”
“No, why would I?’
“Because you seem very interested in my future and we don’t know each other very well, so I’m wondering what this is all about.”

Ola looks around and finally sits down next to you. A couple people look, but say nothing, you’re a little taken back by all this though.

“This town is a good place with good people. We like our relative isolation, especially after hearing some of the tales from your pirate shipmates and other pirates we’ve dealt with in the past. But um…isolation has its downsides. There sometimes is um…lack of potential mates. At least not related ones.” Ola says.

You start to tense up at where this might be going.

“Now some women of this town have sex with the pirates that visit here and that’s good as it provides new blood for the town, but it is sometimes hard on these mothers to raise these children without a father around. A good family should have a mother and father.” Ola says.
“So…what exactly are you asking me?”
“I’m asking if you would consider…(breathes nervously) being my husband.”

You had a feeling, but you still weren’t quite prepared. How could you be? It isn’t like you get asked out of the blue to be someone’s husband!

Ola goes on to explain that she knows how this might seem strange to an outsider like you, but she says that she fears her arranged marriage to her cousin since he has many undesirable physical traits that would not make for a strong child.

However, she also doesn’t wish to submit herself to a one-night stand with some pirate (Apparently she’s a bit on the moral side which is funny that she would come to you in the first place) and wants a husband to stick around to help raise your children. (Yes, she’s already implied that she wants more than one.)

So she’s picked you as a “last ditch” effort to find a husband who is physically fit (and attractive as she has mentioned as a secondary concern) and is most assuredly not related to her in some way. She also has said in the few conversations you’ve had with her you seem okay personality wise and not being a rapist is a big plus to her. (Curse your parents for instilling some sort of values in you)

For her part, Ola seems like a nice girl and isn’t ugly. She’s no Annah or Yvette, but you could certainly do worse.

You’re a bit overwhelmed by all this sudden information though and as much as you don’t want to get back on the Steadfast again, that’s only going to be a year. This is going to be well…presumably until you die because she’s already made it quite clear that passage off this island is a rarity.

You probably wouldn’t see home again.

But then again what did you really have going on there? You tried being a thief and that didn’t work out like you planned. You tried this pirate thing and that hasn’t worked out either. All you’ve gotten is headache from your life of crime and not much to show for it ultimately. Also you don’t really have a home anymore anyway seeing as you got permanently kicked out of Teckleville.

That thought about you finally giving all this up and becoming a normal boring person? Well that day might be today.
> You get married
It’s crazy and maybe you’re going to severely regret this later, but getting married and out of this life sounds a whole hell of a lot better than getting on that ship for another year.

“Fuck it, let’s do it.” You say.
“Seriously?” Ola asks a little surprised.
“Yeah, I’m serious. Where and when is this going to happen?”
“Uh, well when I get off work in a little while we could go to the temple of Kalhu. The shaman should be able to perform the ceremony.”
“So we don’t need your parents there or anything?”
“No, all we need to be is bonded in the many eyes of Kalhu. This is great! This is really wonderful!” Ola beams.

You still have a few questions even though because while you’re half way committing to this, there is still time to back out if it’s too crazy.

“Um, okay, but wait I do need to ask. This isn’t going to piss off your family is it? I mean you were engaged to your cousin, I don’t want to cause some family drama or feud.”
“Well I suppose my cousin will be upset, but you hardly have to worry about him. He’s not really fit and strong like you are. His mother might also be upset, but as far as my family goes you shouldn’t have too many problems. My father might be gruff with you, but his main concern is if you’re going to be a good provider. Now did you do anything before being a pirate?”

You explain to Ola some of your past, which causes another frown from her. However when you get past all the thief stuff and briefly mention dealing with some wildlife for Dr. Gossey she stops you.

“Wait, so you have experience trapping and dealing with fauna?” Ola asks.
“Well I wouldn’t say that exactly. I mean I had a pet qweepa, but that’s because I had it from when it was a baby. And I had to collect these monster snail crab eggs.” You say.
“That may be good enough. My cousin is a trapper and needs help sometimes keeping the pest population down in this town. He can teach you all you need to know. You could probably work with him.”
“Won’t that be weird considering I’m marrying you?”
“Huh? Oh no, this is a different cousin and he’s married to my older sister so there won’t be any trouble there.”
“Oh. Well that’s good to hear, I guess.”

Ola goes on excitedly about how she will be a good wife to you and believes that Kalhu must have sent you personally to reward her for her prayers to him. This is all getting a little too “real” for you and you tell her that you need to get a few things from the ship, but this makes her nervous.

“You’re coming back right?” she asks.
“I’m coming back, don’t worry. I just really need to get the rest of my belongings off the ship. I mean I have a tidy hidden sum still aboard the ship, if I’m staying I don’t want to just abandon that.” You say.
“…okay I trust you. But please hurry back!” Ola says and then kisses you on the lips.

She then walks away with a smile, but it’s very apparent she’s concerned you are leaving.

And honestly you’re wondering if you should.

You leave the tavern and quickly make your way back to the ship. You pace the floor of the empty cabin still wondering what the hell you’re going to do. You feel really bad for just leaving Ola. She didn’t really deserve getting her hopes up, only to get them destroyed. But…

Getting married? Being a pest trapper? Settling down and having a whole mess o babies? What the hell were you thinking?

“Hey, didn’t expect anyone to be aboard, well except the captain and he’s always in his quarters.” One of your fatter crewmates says as he comes wandering in the door.

“Hey you seen my lucky dice? Gotta game with Fleegle and Hok an’ those dice never let me down yet.” He asks.
“No.” you say still lost in your own thoughts.
“Meh, no matter, those two idiots got the worst luck anyway. I’ll easily take them like I took that long haired lass on the last ship we raided, hahahahaha!”

You continue to pace and think, but this asshole keeps insisting on speaking to you.

“What’s crawled up yer ass and got you all jittery? Yer about to wear a hole in the floor.” He asks.
“Nothing.” You say.
“Doesn’t look like nothin’ to me. You worrying about all the mermaid rumors in these southern waters? Listen I’ve been at sea long before you were even unleashed from yer father’s balls and I ain’t never seen a mermaid. They don’t even fucking exist…”
“Will you just shut the fuck up?! I don’t give a shit about what you have to fucking say! I got my own problems!” you snap.

The fat pirate’s demeanor now changes to hostility.

“You fucking little cunt. Don’t think I won’t kick the shit out of you and throw you overboard after I’m done shoving my big fat cock up yer prissy ass. I see you walkin’ around here thinkin’ yer too good for this life and keepin’ to yerself. And that’s fine, but I also see that YOU haven’t been pullin’ yer fuckin’ weight around here. Whenever we go on a raid, you stay in the back like a fucking bitch. Well let me tell you something, the next raid we go on, I better see some fucking bloodshed or I’m gonna make good on my previous threat.”

This fat ass is twice your size and you don’t have much room to move around. You back down.

“Alright, alright, apologies. Just a little preoccupied with something and I didn’t mean to take it out on you.” You say holding your hands up and stepping back. The fat pirate smirks and snorts in distain at your compliance.

And it’s at that moment you’ve made your choice.

As soon as he turns his back, you punch the fat fuck as hard as you can in the base of his skull. The big man being unprepared for this crumples into the lowest hanging hammock and then you do it again. You aren’t sure if you’ve killed him, but he’s not moving. No matter, they’ll probably think he’s just asleep for awhile.

“All that time at sea and you never learned not to turn your back on a thief. Stupid fat asshole.” You say.

You quickly gather up your belongings, loot the body of your dead crewmate and leave the ship. Fortunately you don’t bump into any other crewmembers or the captain on your way out.

You return to the tavern where Ola works. She’s busy at the moment, but smiles when she sees you. While you wait for her shift to be over, you go through your small bag of valuables (as well as your newly acquired one) and try to find something to give to her. With a bit more luck on your side, you manage to find a gold ring. Probably not her size, but it’s the thought that counts.

Later that night, you and Ola go to the temple of Kalhu. The shaman there is a bit strange and so is the ceremony, but happily it’s not that long. Within just a half hour, you’re married and you soon find out that Ola’s years of purity have paid off in your favor because apparently she had A LOT of pent up…”energy.” You don’t even make it that far out the temple before she’s ready to consummate the marriage! Certainly no complaint on that front at least.

Over the course of the next few days you mainly hideout at Ola’s cousin’s home (The pest trapper, not the one you just stole his bride to be from) since you’re a little concerned that your fellow crewmates are going to come looking for you. However, they either don’t give a shit that you killed fat ass, or they still think he’s asleep. Either way, they ultimately leave without you and you’re finally in the clear.

You aren’t exactly religious yourself, but you do give a little silent praise to Yag for your incredible fortune over these last few days. You just hope if he IS watching over you even to the smallest degree that your luck doesn’t suddenly turn to shit for your brand new life.

And it is a brand new life now. You’re married and on your way to be just some boring normal person in some boring small town that was much like the one you got run out of over a decade ago. Not to mention you’ll most likely live out the rest of your life and die here.

But that’s okay. Things could be a lot worse. Who knows, maybe you’ll even still find a little excitement here and there even if it is of the mundane kind. This is after all a whole different experience for you to discover and enjoy if you can.

Whatever happens, your days as a rogue are over.


Year 28

When you joined three years ago, you figured it would be a couple months maybe. You didn't know how far away all these places you're raiding were going to be, let alone how long it would be before you returned home.

The raids themselves aren’t exactly fun for you either. You realize you’re really not the bloodthirsty type who gets off on killing folks all the time. There’s been a lot of times you’ve hung back just so you can avoid most of the direct combat.

And that’s starting to getting a bit noticeable mainly because enough of the crew has died that it can’t afford to have any slackers. Fortunately Captain Rifiv hasn’t called you out on it and it’s just been a few of the crew bitching at you.

This isn’t even counting the rape and there’s a lot of that you haven’t been engaging in either. Though some of them seem content on buggering each other. (And no matter how long you've been at sea, you can honestly say there's nothing that would even make you THINK about sticking it to any of this loathsome lot you're with!)

The only minor upside is you’ve been doing okay as far as loot is concerned. These idiots haven’t been paying attention that you’ve been pilfering the odd coins or baubles from them so you actually have more than your share. However, you aren’t exactly doing all that much better than you were as a regular thief though and worse, you’re stuck at sea most of the time so you can’t even enjoy it like you’d prefer.

There’s also the fact that you've learned your way around a ship a lot more, though you question if this knowledge would actually ever be useful since you’re having serious doubts about ever setting foot on another ship ever again.

Currently you’re somewhere in the far southwest seas at some small port town called Gix. The Steadfast has been using the place as a rest stop in between raids mainly because it’s the only civilized place in this area that is accepting of pirates and has been for as long as anyone can remember.

This place isn’t Hessla though and isn’t a “criminal town.” It’s just run by normal people going about their simple normal lives. The locals are a bit live and let live for the most part. They don’t particularly enjoy having violent drunken pirates visiting, but as long as the pirates aren’t messing with them, they’re fine with accommodating them.

Sort of reminds you of how Teckleville used to turn a blind eye to you and your sister robbing travelling merchants.

You miss those days and not even the robbing part. You find that you’re missing home in general. Maybe not even home so much you miss the environment as strange as that might seem. Then again, you never had the wanderlust that your sister had. (You imagine other than the killing and rape, she’d find all this pirate stuff pretty exciting) Had things been different you probably would have never left Teckleville.

Maybe you would have eventually settled down and become boring like everyone else in that town. At this point that doesn’t seem all that bad. You guess you’re just realizing that you’re starting to get tired of this life.

Since you’re hanging out with the Steadfast crew most of the time, you always take the opportunity to stay away from the lot of them when in town. Instead of drinking at the “pirate bar” of the town, you drink at the quieter one that the locals seem to prefer.

The first time you entered you got a lot of strange looks, but now nobody bats an eye. You’re just minding your business after all. Still, occasionally the barmaid speaks to you and is fairly cordial. Seems to be in a more talkative mood today…

“Another successful voyage of raiding and pillaging?” Ola asks.
“I suppose so. Got enough money to spend here.” You answer.
“Drinking does seem to be one of the more civilized favorite past times of you lot. Good thing of course since we’d have significantly less coin coming into the town. Sort of wondering though, how come you always come in here rather than going to the usual taverns?”
“Because I have to spend practically all my time around those assholes, so the moment I actually don’t have to is a blessing.”
“If you don’t like the folks you sail with, why do it?”
“Good question, and one I’ve been asking myself more and more each day before finally coming to the inevitable conclusion.”
“Which is?”
“That this pirate life isn’t for me. As soon as we get back to Hessla, I’m not setting foot on a ship again. (Sigh) Another year at sea though before we return…ugh…I just dunno if I can take it.”
“Well, why not just leave now?”
“…hmmm…I suppose I could…I doubt if they’d come looking for me. Do you have any transport ships that go to Hessla?”

Ola frowns a bit.

“We don’t have ANY big ships. In case you haven’t realized, we’re a small town not a bustling trading city we hear you lot talk about. If it weren’t for pirates coming here, we probably would never have much contact with the rest of the world. I mean the best you could do is get yourself a rowboat and row to this Hessla place. How far is it?” Ola asks.
“Too far. I doubt if I could even make it to Jicol in a rowboat. Oh well, guess I can tough out another year.” You say.
“Why not just stay here?”
“Here? What would I do here?”
“Um, well you know your way around a ship right? You could work as a fisherman.”
“Ugh, trying to get away from boats actually. Still, sitting in a rowboat and peacefully fishing sounds a lot more attractive right now than what I am doing.”
“What are some of your other skills…um, I mean those that don’t involve killing and raping people.”
“First off, I’ve never raped anyone…” you start to say before Ola interrupts.
“You haven’t? Oh thank Kalhu!”

You give Ola a bit of a strange look. Granted you two don’t really know each other that well, but she seems way more talkative than she has in the past. If you didn’t know any better you’d say she was flirting with you in some strange way.

“Okay, first who is Kalhu?” you ask.
“The god of this island of course. All the times you’ve been here, you’ve never heard of him before?” Ola says.
“Don’t really pay much attention to religion. You’re not going to preach at me are you?”
“No, why would I?’
“Because you seem very interested in my future and we don’t know each other very well, so I’m wondering what this is all about.”

Ola looks around and finally sits down next to you. A couple people look, but say nothing, you’re a little taken back by all this though.

“This town is a good place with good people. We like our relative isolation, especially after hearing some of the tales from your pirate shipmates and other pirates we’ve dealt with in the past. But um…isolation has its downsides. There sometimes is um…lack of potential mates. At least not related ones.” Ola says.

You start to tense up at where this might be going.

“Now some women of this town have sex with the pirates that visit here and that’s good as it provides new blood for the town, but it is sometimes hard on these mothers to raise these children without a father around. A good family should have a mother and father.” Ola says.
“So…what exactly are you asking me?”
“I’m asking if you would consider…(breathes nervously) being my husband.”

You had a feeling, but you still weren’t quite prepared. How could you be? It isn’t like you get asked out of the blue to be someone’s husband!

Ola goes on to explain that she knows how this might seem strange to an outsider like you, but she says that she fears her arranged marriage to her cousin since he has many undesirable physical traits that would not make for a strong child.

However, she also doesn’t wish to submit herself to a one-night stand with some pirate (Apparently she’s a bit on the moral side which is funny that she would come to you in the first place) and wants a husband to stick around to help raise your children. (Yes, she’s already implied that she wants more than one.)

So she’s picked you as a “last ditch” effort to find a husband who is physically fit (and attractive as she has mentioned as a secondary concern) and is most assuredly not related to her in some way. She also has said in the few conversations you’ve had with her you seem okay personality wise and not being a rapist is a big plus to her. (Curse your parents for instilling some sort of values in you)

For her part, Ola seems like a nice girl and isn’t ugly. She’s no Annah or Yvette, but you could certainly do worse.

You’re a bit overwhelmed by all this sudden information though and as much as you don’t want to get back on the Steadfast again, that’s only going to be a year. This is going to be well…presumably until you die because she’s already made it quite clear that passage off this island is a rarity.

You probably wouldn’t see home again.

But then again what did you really have going on there? You tried being a thief and that didn’t work out like you planned. You tried this pirate thing and that hasn’t worked out either. All you’ve gotten is headache from your life of crime and not much to show for it ultimately. Also you don’t really have a home anymore anyway seeing as you got permanently kicked out of Teckleville.

That thought about you finally giving all this up and becoming a normal boring person? Well that day might be today.
> You get back to the ship
It’s just too much to sacrifice. Maybe you’ll settle down one day, maybe even after you get back to Hessla, but you can’t see yourself doing it here stuck in some island at the ass end of the world to a girl you hardly know.

“I’m sorry Ola, but I just can’t do it. You’re a nice girl, but this is too sudden and we don’t know each other well enough.” You say.
“I understand. I was not hopeful of my odds anyway.”
“We could still, you know…do the other thing if you want.”

Ola shakes her head.

“I’m sorry but I just wasn’t raised that way. Things might be much easier if I hadn’t. (Sigh) I will remain pure for my husband to be. My cousin deserves that much.” Ola says and gets up to leave.

Seeing as things are a bit awkward here now, you decide to leave altogether. You figure you’ll just spend the remainder of your time on board the ship in the bunks. It’ll be time to leave soon anyway.

Sure enough in a few days you’re on your way.

Year 29

Half of the year has already passed, but it can’t end soon enough. You’re barely getting along with most of the crew at this point and all this violence you’ve been participating in has made you less tolerant in general.

You’ve already had a couple of fistfights with a few. While this hasn’t done much to improve your popularity nobody is ever accusing you of being a pussy who doesn’t pull his weight. Figures you’d start fitting in towards the end.

Of course you have no intention of continuing being a pirate and are still fully dedicated to leaving this shitty experience behind. You still have no idea what you’re going to do when you get back. Your experience with Ola months ago has made you rethink your ideas of possibly “settling down.” You’re starting to think maybe you might try your hand at being a mercenary or something similar. You have gotten very good at killing and it doesn’t even bother you anymore after all. (It’s just being around all these assholes on this cramped ship that bothers you)

As you’re looking off into the ocean pondering your potential new career when you get back, you start to hear something.

Yes…kill.

You look around and immediately shout at one of your nearest shipmates.

“What did you say?” you demand.
“Huh? I didn’t say nuthin.” He says and backs away a bit.

You return to your thoughts and then hear something else.

Kill them all…

The voice is very close, like it’s almost coming inside your head. You rub your eyes and then you notice a medium splash in the waters. When you look harder you see a head briefly pop up. Looks female.

You need to kill them all and return them to the sea…to be with us…forever

Now your mind feels like a thousand needles are being shoved in it as these voices assault it. You crumple to the deck and you’re so busy clutching your head in pain and trying to fight whatever is attacking you, that you don’t even notice that other crew members are starting to suffer similar affects.

Some of the crew immediately jump overboard, others are wailing in pain and barely moving. Captain Rifiv at this point has come out of his cabin and begun yelling at everyone to shove wax in their ears.

It’s a little too late for you however. The mermaids already have taken advantage of your less than stable mood and are now directing you to do something you’ve thought about doing many times anyway. Namely killing the assholes you’re sailing with.

You waste no time in obeying the siren’s call of murdering your shipmates, most of which don’t put up too much of a fight due to their own mind assaults.

You do fairly well cutting down most of the crew, but even with mermaid help, you still are only one man and eventually Captain Rifiv puts you down with shot to your back which is then followed up by several cutlass chops to the neck and head by some of the less helpless crew.