《笑林广记·腐流部》
有个穷人到各寺院窃取神物灵心，只有土地庙还没有去偷，等到他来到土地庙挖开土地爷的肚皮，见肚子里什么也没有，便惊叹道说： 看他头巾倒是戴了一顶，原来腹中毫无一物！ 
穷人往各寺院，窃取神物灵心。止有土地庙未取，及去挖开，见空空如也。乃骇叹曰： 看他巾便戴一顶，原来腹中毫无一物！ 
A poor man went to each temple to steal the gods' treasures, but only the Earth God Temple had not been stolen. When he came to the Earth God Temple and dug open the Earth Lord's belly, he saw that there was nothing in his stomach, so he exclaimed and said: Look at his turban, he was wearing one, but it turned out that there was nothing in his stomach!
<s>[INST] I need this in both modern chinese phrasing and English - could you help? 穷人往各寺院，窃取神物灵心。止有土地庙未取，及去挖开，见空空如也。乃骇叹曰： 看他巾便戴一顶，原来腹中毫无一物！  [/INST] Contemporary: 有个穷人到各寺院窃取神物灵心，只有土地庙还没有去偷，等到他来到土地庙挖开土地爷的肚皮，见肚子里什么也没有，便惊叹道说： 看他头巾倒是戴了一顶，原来腹中毫无一物！  English version: A poor man went to each temple to steal the gods' treasures, but only the Earth God Temple had not been stolen. When he came to the Earth God Temple and dug open the Earth Lord's belly, he saw that there was nothing in his stomach, so he exclaimed and said: Look at his turban, he was wearing one, but it turned out that there was nothing in his stomach!</s>
I need this in both modern chinese phrasing and English - could you help? 穷人往各寺院，窃取神物灵心。止有土地庙未取，及去挖开，见空空如也。乃骇叹曰： 看他巾便戴一顶，原来腹中毫无一物！
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Contemporary: 有个穷人到各寺院窃取神物灵心，只有土地庙还没有去偷，等到他来到土地庙挖开土地爷的肚皮，见肚子里什么也没有，便惊叹道说： 看他头巾倒是戴了一顶，原来腹中毫无一物！  English version: A poor man went to each temple to steal the gods' treasures, but only the Earth God Temple had not been stolen. When he came to the Earth God Temple and dug open the Earth Lord's belly, he saw that there was nothing in his stomach, so he exclaimed and said: Look at his turban, he was wearing one, but it turned out that there was nothing in his stomach!
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