《孔子家语·三恕》
孔子说： 君子有三恕：有国君而不能侍奉，有臣子却要役使，这不是恕；有父母却不孝敬，有孩子却要求他回报，这也不是恕；有哥哥却不尊敬，有弟弟却要求他顺从，这也不是恕。
孔子曰： 君子有三恕。有君不能事，有臣而求其使，非恕也；有亲不能孝，有子而求其报，非恕也；有兄不能敬，有弟而求其顺，非恕也。
The Master said, “There are three kinds of people whom a gentleman excuses: If one has a ruler one cannot serve, if one has a minister one must order about, one is not excused; if one has parents one does not honor, if one has a child from whom one demands a return, one is not excused; if one has elder brothers one does not revere, if one has younger brothers from whom one demands harmony, one is not excused.” 