ejaculation is not the mode of transmission and is not required in order for herpes to spread but rather that active virus on the skin or mucous membrane. the problem with genital herpes is that one never is 100% sure if it is active or not. certainly when fresh lesions are present it is active but many people have contract herpes from partners who did not have an active lesion. unfortunately the answer to your question is "maybe". there is really no way to be sure if you transmitted herpes to this person or not. if she shows up at your house with a baseball bat and angry look on her face then you may get a hint. if you care about someone enough to have an intimate relationship with them and you know you have a history of genital herpes why not use a condom to protect them?
i am a male with genital herpes and a girl gives me oral sex and i don't ejaculate will she get oral or genital herpes