having sex again after 12 years of inactivity can be a bit anxiety-producing for you. having unbearable pain with sex is definitely adding to this anxiety. your first and most important step is to see your gynecologist for an examination. not knowing your age vaginal dryness would be one possibility. intercourse can cause tiny little tears in your delicate vaginal tissue so these fissures could be re-opening each time you attempt to have sex. there can be other issues of course. don't be embarrassed to discuss this with your medical provider. it is a real problem that needs a proper solution. your partner's penis size is not as important as his gentleness patience and caring so you may need to postpone vaginal sex for a while until you can be properly examined and treated. i am confident that this problem can be fixed and that you will soon be enjoying sex again.
my partner is unable to put his penis in me because i find it very painful and almost unbearable. i have been sexually inactive for twelve years and am active now. but when my partner tries to put his penis in me i find it painful and almost unbearable (have had bleeding a few times). is it possible that my vagina "shrunk" after so many years of inactivity? and it doesn't help that my partner is well endowed. can you advise me as to what i should or could do? .