because the many aspects of our lives are inter-related problems in one area often create difficulties in others too. for example a husband or wife losing a job generally puts a strain on their marriage. that strain can cause tension creating an emotional rift between them. if one of them has struggled with overeating alcoholism depression or poor anger management those issues are likely to return. and all of this can overflow into problem with children who live within this strained home environment. when this happens to you the most important first step (after realizing how overwhelmed you feel) is to really look at the ‘mountain. ’ what you will see upon closer inspection is that the mountain is not really one big weight. it is more like a pile of rocks. some of those rocks might be really heavy but they are each much more manageable than the mountain that you previously perceived. once you see your problems as a pile of rocks you can begin to sort them; from pebbles to boulders. tossing out the pebbles is relatively easy (is being five minutes late for work because of traffic really worth all that frustration? ). you can also move many of those rocks off of you (if talking to jane at work causes nothing but aggravation you can minimize your interactions with her. ). the result is that the mountain is no longer so big and unmovable. you will also begin to see how to move other rocks that didn’t seem to budge before. so for instance as you begin to lighten your load when your mother makes those critical comments that she so frequently tosses out you will begin to see them as her problem — not one you need to carry. you might still get upset but perhaps less so and you will be able to move past it more quickly.
what can i do when life feels overwhelming?