<p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l304SVDu1M8" rel="nofollow noreferrer">Patikulamanasikara</a> is the meditation recommended to the person defeated by lust.
Whenever you see people or think about people(including yourself), meditate on them in terms of those body parts until the perception of a person goes away and all you see is contemptible body parts.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T05:16:11.020Z
2018-01-12T05:16:11.020Z
Sankha Kulathantille
<p>Ways of <a href="http://zugangzureinsicht.org/html/lib/authors/nyanaponika/wheel026_en.html#des" rel="nofollow noreferrer">Denourishing of Sensual Desire</a>.</p>

<p>Asubha reflextion, refextion on the ugly of the body behind skin, hair, nails, reflecting the backwards of sensuality.</p>

<p>Watching the dogs on the street...</p>

<p><em>[Note: This is a gift of Dhamma, not meant for commercial use or other lower wordily gains by ways of exchange or trade]</em></p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T05:55:15.967Z
More complete method is here: https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn35/sn35.127.than.html
Dhamma Dhatu
CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T06:07:21.107Z
Why the downvote? While this may not be YOUR favorite way of addressing the matter, is *was* recommended by the Buddha and has been used by many for ages.
Gotamist
CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T19:40:16.307Z
@Gotamist. I posted the way of the Buddha, which is metta plus asuba. Asuba alone won't work. Metta is to view women as mothers, sisters & daughters rather than to view them as sex objects. If you can see that sexual promiscuity of women diminishes & often destroys the capacity for good motherhood, then you might understand the teachings of Gotama better. In summary, asuba is not really necessary for laypeople. It is generally pointless suggesting asuba to a layperson who does not have the disposition to be a monk. Regards
Dhamma Dhatu
CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T21:54:10.900Z
@Dhammadhatu I see.  So it was a criticism of "asubha alone". Thanks for the link!
Gotamist
CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T05:33:54.850Z
2018-01-12T05:33:54.850Z
Samana Johann
<p>Buddhism only teaches about suffering &amp; freedom from suffering (<a href="https://suttacentral.net/en/mn22" rel="nofollow noreferrer">MN 22</a>). Buddhism teaches: &quot;<a href="https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ati/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.15.budd.html" rel="nofollow noreferrer"><em>There is no fire like lust</em></a>&quot; (Dhp 202), which is a natural law.</p>
<blockquote>
<p><em>One excited by lust, overcome by lust, with mind obsessed by it, intends for his own affliction, for the affliction of others or for the affliction of both, and he experiences mental suffering and dejection.</em></p>
<p><a href="https://suttacentral.net/en/an3.54" rel="nofollow noreferrer"><em>AN 3.54</em></a></p>
</blockquote>
<p>I can only recommend to research the suffering of both male &amp; female sex &amp; pornography workers &amp; the growth of women on antidepressants, in order to learn how such extreme sexual behaviours bring the growth of suffering &amp; the reduction in pleasure.</p>
<blockquote>
<p><em>Jenna Jameson...has been called the world's most famous adult entertainment performer and &quot;The Queen of Porn&quot;... Jameson would make
requests for drugs... the pills of choice were Xanax, Ambien and
Suboxone along with alcohol... Jameson gave birth to twin boys... Jameson and Ortiz split up ... Ortiz was granted full custody of the twins...</em></p>
<p><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jenna_Jameson#Relationships_and_health" rel="nofollow noreferrer"><em>Wikipedia</em></a></p>
</blockquote>
<p>In summary, a solution to cure these sexual disorders is to see clearly they are disorders that bring suffering rather than activities that bring sustainable happiness.</p>
<blockquote>
<p><em>Suppose a dog, overcome with weakness &amp; hunger, were to come across a slaughterhouse, and there a dexterous butcher or butcher's apprentice
were to fling him a chain of bones — thoroughly scraped, without any
flesh, smeared with blood. What do you think: Would the dog, gnawing
on that chain of bones — thoroughly scraped, without any flesh,
smeared with blood — appease its weakness &amp; hunger?</em></p>
<p><em>No, lord. And why is that? Because the chain of bones is thoroughly scraped, without any flesh, &amp; smeared with blood. The dog would get
nothing but its share of weariness &amp; vexation.</em></p>
<p><em>In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a chain of
bones, of much stress, much despair &amp; greater drawbacks.'</em></p>
<p><em>More metaphors here:</em> <a href="https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ati/tipitaka/mn/mn.054x.than.html" rel="nofollow noreferrer"><em>Potaliya Sutta</em></a></p>
</blockquote>
<p>Buddhism teaches to relate to other people with kindness &amp; compassion, including sexual partners. Most women want to have children, similar to the porn queen Jemma Jameson. The more sexual partners a women has, let alone the more engaging in extreme forms of sex, generally, the more diminished their capacity to be good or normal mothers will be.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-12T04:18:20.623Z
2018-01-12T19:45:05.450Z
2020-06-17T09:56:10.877Z
Dhamma Dhatu
<p>I have extreme sexual fantasies that hurt me (submission, candaulism, etc.).
Because of the internet and pornography many young people have increasingly extreme fantasies, and when they are attached to submitting to the partner, many suffer from it and would like to become dominant, strong, or at least normal men again.</p>

<p>Does Buddhism have a solution to cure these sexual disorders?</p>

<p>Regards.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-01-13T02:59:04.590Z
Yes, Buddhism has answers. These disorders happen when people don't know how to manage their own energy. See my answer here on details of energy management: https://buddhism.stackexchange.com/a/24598/43
Andriy Volkov
<modern-world><daily-life><sexuality><sexual-misconduct>
Does Buddhism have an answer to disturbing sexual fantasies?
# Does Buddhism have an answer to disturbing sexual fantasies?

(Asked by: username_0 on 2018-01-12)

I have extreme sexual fantasies that hurt me (submission, candaulism, etc.).
Because of the internet and pornography many young people have increasingly extreme fantasies, and when they are attached to submitting to the partner, many suffer from it and would like to become dominant, strong, or at least normal men again.

Does Buddhism have a solution to cure these sexual disorders?

Regards.

**Tags:** modern-world, daily-life, sexuality, sexual-misconduct

> **Comments:**
> **username_1**: Yes, Buddhism has answers. These disorders happen when people don't know how to manage their own energy. See my answer here on details of energy management: https://buddhism.stackexchange.com/a/24598/43  

---

## 3 answers

### Answer by username_3 on 2018-01-12. Score: 4

Ways of [Denourishing of Sensual Desire](http://zugangzureinsicht.org/html/lib/authors/nyanaponika/wheel026_en.html#des).

Asubha reflextion, refextion on the ugly of the body behind skin, hair, nails, reflecting the backwards of sensuality.

Watching the dogs on the street...

*[Note: This is a gift of Dhamma, not meant for commercial use or other lower wordily gains by ways of exchange or trade]*

> **Comments:**
> **username_4**: More complete method is here: https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn35/sn35.127.than.html  
> **username_5**: Why the downvote? While this may not be YOUR favorite way of addressing the matter, is *was* recommended by the Buddha and has been used by many for ages.  
> **username_4**: @username_5. I posted the way of the Buddha, which is metta plus asuba. Asuba alone won't work. Metta is to view women as mothers, sisters & daughters rather than to view them as sex objects. If you can see that sexual promiscuity of women diminishes & often destroys the capacity for good motherhood, then you might understand the teachings of Gotama better. In summary, asuba is not really necessary for laypeople. It is generally pointless suggesting asuba to a layperson who does not have the disposition to be a monk. Regards  
> **username_5**: @Dhammadhatu I see.  So it was a criticism of "asubha alone". Thanks for the link!  

---

### Answer by username_4 on 2018-01-12. Score: 3

Buddhism only teaches about suffering & freedom from suffering ([MN 22](https://suttacentral.net/en/mn22)). Buddhism teaches: "[*There is no fire like lust*](https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ati/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.15.budd.html)" (Dhp 202), which is a natural law.

> *One excited by lust, overcome by lust, with mind obsessed by it, intends for his own affliction, for the affliction of others or for the affliction of both, and he experiences mental suffering and dejection.*
>
> [*AN 3.54*](https://suttacentral.net/en/an3.54)

I can only recommend to research the suffering of both male & female sex & pornography workers & the growth of women on antidepressants, in order to learn how such extreme sexual behaviours bring the growth of suffering & the reduction in pleasure.

> *Jenna Jameson...has been called the world's most famous adult entertainment performer and "The Queen of Porn"... Jameson would make
> requests for drugs... the pills of choice were Xanax, Ambien and
> Suboxone along with alcohol... Jameson gave birth to twin boys... Jameson and Ortiz split up ... Ortiz was granted full custody of the twins...*
>
> [*Wikipedia*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jenna_Jameson#Relationships_and_health)

In summary, a solution to cure these sexual disorders is to see clearly they are disorders that bring suffering rather than activities that bring sustainable happiness.

> *Suppose a dog, overcome with weakness & hunger, were to come across a slaughterhouse, and there a dexterous butcher or butcher's apprentice
> were to fling him a chain of bones — thoroughly scraped, without any
> flesh, smeared with blood. What do you think: Would the dog, gnawing
> on that chain of bones — thoroughly scraped, without any flesh,
> smeared with blood — appease its weakness & hunger?*
>
> *No, lord. And why is that? Because the chain of bones is thoroughly scraped, without any flesh, & smeared with blood. The dog would get
> nothing but its share of weariness & vexation.*
>
> *In the same way, householder, a disciple of the noble ones considers this point: 'The Blessed One has compared sensuality to a chain of
> bones, of much stress, much despair & greater drawbacks.'*
>
> *More metaphors here:* [*Potaliya Sutta*](https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ati/tipitaka/mn/mn.054x.than.html)

Buddhism teaches to relate to other people with kindness & compassion, including sexual partners. Most women want to have children, similar to the porn queen Jemma Jameson. The more sexual partners a women has, let alone the more engaging in extreme forms of sex, generally, the more diminished their capacity to be good or normal mothers will be.


---

### Answer by username_2 on 2018-01-12. Score: 2

[Patikulamanasikara](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l304SVDu1M8) is the meditation recommended to the person defeated by lust.
Whenever you see people or think about people(including yourself), meditate on them in terms of those body parts until the perception of a person goes away and all you see is contemptible body parts.


---

