First Lady of the Confederate States
Varina Anne Banks Davis (née Howell; May 7, 1826 – October 16, 1906) was the only First Lady of the Confederate States of America, and the longtime second wife of President Jefferson Davis. She moved to the presidential mansion in Richmond, Virginia, in mid-1861, and lived there for the remainder of the Civil War. Born and raised in the Southern United States and educated in Philadelphia, she had family on both sides of the conflict and unconventional views for a woman in her public role. She did not support the Confederacy's position on slavery, and was ambivalent about the war.
Davis became a writer after the war, completing her husband's memoir. She was recruited by Kate (Davis) Pulitzer, a purportedly distant cousin of Varina’s husband and wife of publisher Joseph Pulitzer, to write articles and eventually a regular column for the "New York World". Widowed in 1889, Davis moved to New York with her youngest daughter Winnie in 1891 to work at writing. She enjoyed urban life. In her old age, she attempted to reconcile prominent figures of the North and South.
Early life and education.
Varina Anne Banks Howell was born in 1826 at Natchez, Mississippi, the daughter of William Burr Howell and Margaret Louisa Kempe. Her father was from a distinguished family in New Jersey: His father, Richard Howell, served several terms as governor of New Jersey and died when William was a boy. William inherited little money and used family connections to become a clerk in the Bank of the United States.
William Howell relocated to Mississippi, when new cotton plantations were being rapidly developed. There he met and married Margaret Louisa Kempe (1806–1867), born in Prince William County, Virginia. Her wealthy planter family had moved to Mississippi before 1816. She was the daughter of Colonel James Kempe (sometimes spelled Kemp), a Scots-Irish immigrant from Ulster who became a successful planter and major landowner in Virginia and Mississippi, and Margaret Graham, born in Prince William County. Margaret Graham was illegitimate as her parents, George Graham, a Scots immigrant, and Susanna McAllister (1783–1816) of Virginia, never officially married.
After moving his family from Virginia to Mississippi, James Kempe also bought land in Louisiana, continuing to increase his holdings and productive capacity. When his daughter married Howell, he gave her a dowry of 60 slaves and of land in Mississippi. William Howell worked as a planter, merchant, politician, postmaster, cotton broker, banker, and military commissary manager, but never secured long-term financial success. He lost the majority of Margaret's sizable dowry and inheritance through bad investments and their expensive lifestyle. They suffered intermittent serious financial problems throughout their lives.
Varina was born in Natchez, Mississippi, as the second Howell child of eleven, seven of whom survived to adulthood. She was later described as tall and thin, with an olive complexion attributed to Welsh ancestors. (Later, when she was living in Richmond as the unpopular First Lady of the Confederacy, critics described her as looking like a mulatto or Indian "squaw".)
When Varina was thirteen, her father declared bankruptcy. The Howell family home, furnishings and slaves were seized by creditors to be sold at public auction. 
Her wealthy maternal relatives intervened to redeem the family's property. It was one of several sharp changes in fortune that Varina encountered in her life. She grew to adulthood in a house called The Briars, when Natchez was a thriving city, but she learned her family was dependent on the wealthy Kempe relatives of her mother's family to avoid poverty.
Varina Howell was sent to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, for her education, where she studied at Madame Deborah Grelaud's French School, a prestigious academy for young ladies. Grelaud, a Huguenot, was a refugee from the French Revolution and had founded her school in the 1790s. One of Varina's classmates was Sarah Anne Ellis, later known as Sarah Anne Dorsey, the daughter of extremely wealthy Mississippi planters. (After the Civil War, Dorsey, by then a wealthy widow, provided financial support to the Davises.)
While at school in Philadelphia, Varina got to know many of her northern Howell relatives; she carried on a lifelong correspondence with some, and called herself a "half-breed" for her connections in both regions. After a year, she returned to Natchez, where she was privately tutored by Judge George Winchester, a Harvard graduate and family friend. She was intelligent and better educated than many of her peers, which led to tensions with Southern expectations for women. In her later years, Varina referred fondly to Madame Grelaud and Judge Winchester; she sacrificed to provide the highest quality of education for her two daughters in their turn.
In 1843, at age 17, Howell was invited to spend the Christmas season at Hurricane Plantation, the property of family friends Joseph Emory Davis and Eliza Van Benthuysen Davis. Her parents had named their oldest child after Joseph Davis. Located at Davis Bend, Mississippi, Hurricane was 20 miles south of Vicksburg. Davis was planning a gala housewarming with many guests and entertainers to inaugurate his lavish new mansion on the cotton plantation. (Varina described the house in detail in her memoirs.) During her stay, she met her host's much younger brother Jefferson Davis. Then thirty-five years old, Davis was a West Point graduate, former Army officer, and widower. He worked as a planter, having developed Brierfield Plantation on land his brother allowed him to use, although Joseph Davis still retained possession of the land. 
Marriage and family.
Jefferson Davis was a 35-year-old widower when he and Varina met. His first wife, Sarah Knox Taylor, daughter of his commanding officer Zachary Taylor while he was in the Army, had died of malaria three months after their wedding in 1835. Davis mourned her and had been reclusive in the ensuing eight years. He was beginning to be active in politics.
Shortly after first meeting him, Howell wrote to her mother:I do not know whether this Mr. Jefferson Davis is young or old. He looks both at times; but I believe he is old, for from what I hear he is only two years younger than you are [the rumor was correct]. He impresses me as a remarkable kind of man, but of uncertain temper, and has a way of taking for granted that everybody agrees with him when he expresses an opinion, which offends me; yet he is most agreeable and has a peculiarly sweet voice and a winning manner of asserting himself. The fact is, he is the kind of person I should expect to rescue one from a mad dog at any risk, but to insist upon a stoical indifference to the fright afterward.
In keeping with custom, Davis sought the permission of Howell's parents before beginning a formal courtship. They initially disapproved of him due to the many differences in background, age, and politics. Davis was a Democrat and the Howells, including Varina, were Whigs. In her memoir, Varina Howell Davis wrote that her mother was concerned about Jefferson Davis's excessive devotion to his relatives (particularly his older brother Joseph, who had largely raised him and upon whom he was financially dependent) and his near worship of his deceased first wife. The Howells ultimately consented to the courtship, and the couple became engaged shortly thereafter.
Their wedding was planned as a grand affair to be held at Hurricane Plantation during Christmas of 1844, but the wedding and engagement were cancelled shortly beforehand, for unknown reasons. In January 1845, while Howell was ill with a fever, Davis visited her frequently. They became engaged again. When they married on February 26, 1845, at her parents' house, a few relatives and friends of the bride attended, and none of the groom's family.
Their short honeymoon included a visit to Davis's aged mother, Jane Davis, and a visit to the grave of his first wife in Louisiana. The newlyweds took up residence at Brierfield, the plantation Davis had developed on loaned to him for his use by his brother Joseph Davis. Their first residence was a two-room cottage on the property and they started construction of a main house. It became a source of contention.
Soon after their marriage, Davis's widowed and penniless sister, Amanda (Davis) Bradford, came to live on the Brierfield property along with her seven youngest children. Her brothers decided that she should share the large house which the Davises were building, but they had not consulted Varina Davis. It was an example of what she would later call interference from the Davis family in her life with her husband. Additionally, her brother-in-law Joseph Davis proved controlling, both of his brother, who was 23 years younger, and the even younger Varina – especially during her husband's absences. At the same time, her parents became more financially dependent on the Davises, to her embarrassment and resentment. Their youngest son, born after her own marriage, was named Jefferson Davis Howell in her husband's honor.
The couple had long periods of separation from early in their marriage, first as Jefferson Davis gave campaign speeches and "politicked" (or campaigned) for himself and for other Democratic candidates in the elections of 1846. He was also gone for extended periods during the Mexican War (1846–1848). Varina Davis was put under the guardianship of Joseph Davis, whom she had come to dislike intensely. Her correspondence with her husband during this time demonstrated her growing discontent, to which Jefferson was not particularly sympathetic.
Urban life in Washington, DC.
Jefferson Davis was elected in 1846 to the U.S. House of Representatives and Varina accompanied him to Washington, D.C., which she loved. She was stimulated by the social life with intelligent people and was known for making "unorthodox observations". Among them were that "slaves were human beings with their frailties" and that "everyone was a 'half breed' of one kind or another." She referred to herself as one because of her strong family connections in both North and South. The Davises lived in Washington, DC, for most of the next fifteen years before the American Civil War, which gave Varina Howell Davis a broader outlook than many Southerners. It was her favorite place to live. But, as an example of their many differences, her husband preferred life on their Mississippi plantation.
Soon he took leave from his Congressional position to serve as an officer in the Mexican–American War (1846–1848). Varina Davis returned for a time to Briarfield, where she chafed under the supervision of her brother-in-law, Joseph. The surviving correspondence between the Davises from this period expresses their difficulties and mutual resentments. After her husband's return from the war, Varina Davis did not immediately accompany him to Washington when the Mississippi legislature appointed him to fill a Senate seat.
Ultimately, the couple reconciled. She rejoined her husband in Washington. He had unusual visibility for a freshman senator because of his connections as the son-in-law (by his late wife) and former junior officer of President Zachary Taylor. Varina Davis enjoyed the social life of the capital and quickly established herself as one of the city's most popular (and, in her early 20s, one of the youngest) hostesses and party guests. The 1904 memoir of her contemporary, Virginia Clay-Clopton, described the lively parties of the Southern families in this period with other Congressional delegations, as well as international representatives of the diplomatic corps.
After seven childless years, in 1852, Varina Davis gave birth to a son, Samuel. Her letters from this period express her happiness and portray Jefferson as a doting father. The couple had a total of six children:
The Davises were devastated in 1854 when their first child died before the age of two. Varina Davis largely withdrew from social life for a time. In 1855, she gave birth to a healthy daughter, Margaret (1855–1909); followed by two sons, Jefferson, Jr., (1857–1878) and Joseph (1859–1864), during her husband's remaining tenure in Washington, D.C. The early losses of all four of their sons caused enormous grief to both the Davises.
During the Pierce Administration, Davis was appointed to the post of Secretary of War. He and President Franklin Pierce also formed a personal friendship that would last for the rest of Pierce's life. Their wives developed a strong respect, as well. The Pierces lost their last surviving child, Benny, shortly before his father's inauguration. They both suffered; Pierce became dependent on alcohol and Jane Appleton Pierce had health problems, including depression. At the request of the Pierces, the Davises,