RATIONALE: Giving chemotherapy before a donor bone marrow transplant helps stop the growth of cancer cells. It also helps stop the patient's immune system from rejecting the donor's stem cells. Also, monoclonal antibodies, such as gemtuzumab ozogamicin, can find cancer cells and either kill them or deliver cancer-killing substances to them without harming normal cells. When the healthy stem cells from a donor are infused into the patient they may help the patient's bone marrow make stem cells, red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets.