Senepe ka Thalefang Charles, Mmegi
Ngwaga oo fetiling, go ne ga nna le tiragalo ya kgokgontsho ko mapalamelong a dibese mo Gaborone. Mosadi mongwe o ne a rogwa, godimo ga moo, a apolwa fa gare ga batho, ke banna bangwe ka ntata ya gore ba ne ba akanya gore gaa apara ‘sentle’. Mogwanto wa I Wear What I Want (Re apara se re se batang) o ne wa simollwa ke bomme bangwe, go lwantsha ditiragalo tsa kgogontsho ya basadi mo sechabeng sa rona.
Mo mogwantong wa I wear what I want, ko Gaborone, basadi ba ne ba tla ka dipalo, ba apere jaaka ba batla, go tsamaelana le molaetsa wa mogwanto o. Fa dinepe tsa mogwanto o di pegwa mo Facebook, di ne tsa tlogela bangwe ba sa itumela tota. Mo pegong e, ke tla tlhalosa mabaka a batho ba, a go sa itumela, le go tlhalosa mabaka a me, le a balwela dishwanelo tsa basadi ka nna, a go tswelela go apara se re se batang.
A ruri boleng jwa mosadi bo bonwa ka kapari?
Kgang ya ntlha e ne go buisangwa ka yone mo Facebook ke gore mosadi o tshwanetse go apara sentle gore a tlotliwe. Mo dipuisanong tse, go ne go na le bangwe ba ba dumelang gore mosadi (wa nnete) ke mongwe yoo ikapesang ka mokgwa oo rileng; gore fa o apere bokhutswane bo bo riling, ga o sa thole o le mosadi sentle. Go ne gotwe ba ba neng ba apere bokhutshwane jo be feteletseng ko mogwantong o, ga se basadi ba itlhaloganyang, godimo ga moo go twe go supa dikarolo tse di riling tsa mmele (dirope, marago), go diga boleng jwa gago.
Tumelo e ya gore boleng le bontle jwa motho mosadi bo bonwa mo diaparong tsa gagwe e supa tsholofelo mo basading, gore re tshele matshelo a rona otlhe re akantse gore ba batho ba tla re akanyetsa jang. Jaaka mme mongwe ko mogwantong a buile, kgang e ya gore ga re apara e bo re akantse gore batho baa gore akanyetsa jang, ga se kgang ee siameng. Fa e le gore sechaba sa rona se a go tlotla ditshwanelo tsa basadi, go tlhokega gore basadi re letelelwe go apara se re se batang, le fa go sa ratwe kapari e re itlhophetseng.
A diaparo tsa basadi di baka dipetelelo?
Ditiragalo tsa petelelo le kgokgontsho ya basadi mo mafatsheng ka bophara di tswelela go oketsega ka palo ee sa letelesegeng . Mo Facebook, bangwe be rile go apara bokhutshwane (ga basadi) go diphatsa ka go ka gogomosa banna kana go ba rokotsa mathe. Go na le ba ba dumelang gore fa re batla go emisa kgokgontsho, re tshwanetse go dira melao ee laolang kapari ya bo mme, ka go akangwa gore go laolela basadi kapari go ka thusa go emisa dipetelelo .
Mathata a leng teng fa, ke tumelo ee reng kapari ya basadi e baka kgokgontsho. Se ga se boammaruri. Le fa e ka bo e le nnete, go rokotswa mathe ga go lete motho monna go kgokgontsha kana go betelela mosadi. Go thoka fela gore banna ba itshware sentle, ka gore kapari ya motho ga e ka ke ya beelwa molato wa ditiro tsa batho banna. Go dumela gore kapari ee riling e ka emisa dipetelelo, ke go baa molato wa ditiragalo tsa petelelo mo basading. Go bothokwa gore mo dipuisanong tsa rona ka kgokgontsho le dipetelelo mo basading, re gakologelwe gore ka nako tsothle, mo ditiragalong tse, molato ga se wa basadi.
Mosadi sidirisiwa
Dipuisano tse di supa fa mosadi a sa tlotliwe, e le sidirisiwa. Mongwe o ne a tshwantshanya kgang e ya kapari ya basadi, le kgang ya burukuthi, a botsa gore ke eng batho ba na le mabotana go kata matlo a bone. Molaetsa yoo fithilweng fa, ke gore basadi ba tshwaneletswe ke go apara ba fithile mmele, e seng jalo, ba laletsa kotsi kana kgokgontsho. Se se supa tumelo e e reng basadi ba ba sa apareng sentle ke bone fela ba ba kgokgontshiwang.
Mathata aa leng teng fa, ke gore batho basadi (le bana, le banna bangwe) ba kgokgontshiwa ba apere ka go farologana. Ga gona diaparo tse re ka reng di ka laletsa kgokgontsho. Se se bakang kgokgontsho ya basadi, ke batho ba ba palelwang ke go itaola le go itshwara sentle, ba ba ipaang godimo ga basadi, ba ba sa tlotleng basadi. Batho ba ba kgokgontshang le ba ba thubetsang ba dira jalo ka gore ba bona basadi e le didirisiwa, e seng batho.
Fa e le gore, ruri, re dumela gore kgokgontso le petelelo ke ditiragalo tse di maswe, re tshwanetse go tshwara tumelo eo ka nako tsothle, e seng gore re e latllhe ka di nako tse dingwe. Fa re batla go emisa ditiragalo tsa kgokgontsho le dipetelelo, re tshwanetse gore re emise mekgwa ya go tshwaya phoso mo basading. Go lwantsha ditiragalo tsa kgokgontsho mo Botswana, re tshwanetse go lwantsha kgokgontsho ya basadi botlhe, re sa ba farologanye ka kapari ya bone kana ka boitshwaro jwa bone. Re tshwanetse go tlotla mosadi mongwe le mongwe go tshwana, aa ke mma moruti kana ke mogwebi ka mmele. Re tshwanetse go tlotla basadi ka gore ke batho, re emise go ba tsaa jaaka didirisiwa.
A ruri sechaba se wela tlase ga re apara se re se batang?
Mo dipuisanong tse ke di boneng mo Facebook, go ne go na le ba ba akanyang gore molaetsa wa mogwanto wa #iwearwhatiwant, o tla isa lefatshe tlase. Bangwe ba ne ba supa gore fa basadi ba ka tswelela go apera jaaka ba ne ba direle ko mogwantong, go supa gore “lefatshe le a hela”. Ba bangwe ba ne ba re molaetsa oo, o diphatsa, ka gore fa o ka utliwa ke banana mo dikolong, “tlhakanelo dikobo ya bana” e ka ya magoletsa. (Mmua lebe, le fa a boditswe, o paletswe go tlhalosa gore kapari ya basadi e amana jang le tlhakanelo dikobo ya bana).
Tota ga kea dumalana le molaetsa o, oo reng kapari ya basadi e ka wetsa sechaba tlase. Tiragalo e diragetseng ko mapalamelong a dibese, jaaka go setse go builwe, ke sekai sa gore basadi ga ba tlotliwe mo sechabeng sa rona. Se ke sengwe se se tshwenyang. Mo go nna, fa go na le sesupi sa gore re mo diphatseng re le sechaba, ke kgang ya gore mosetsana o ne a apolwa ke banna fa gare ga batho: banna ba teng ba sa tshabe sepe, ba sa tlhabiwe ke ditlhong, ba kgokgontsha ngwana wa batho hela ba sa mo itse. Mo go nna, se se ka re emisang go tlhabologa – go nna sechaba se se nang le boikarabelo ke ga re ka palelwa ke go reetsa le go amogela melaetsa wa #IwearwhatIwant: mo go tla bo go raya gore re paletswe go tlhaloganya gore tsotlhe ditiragalo tsa kgokgontso ya bomme di busetsa sechaba sa rona ko morago.
*I’d like to thank Pontsho Pilane and Lorato Palesa Modongo for writing the setswana-feminist dictionary which inspired me to write this piece and to write, for the first time in many years, ka setswana.
** I am well aware that golo fa, ke kwadile ka setswana se se robegileng. I really tried, like, ke lekile ka bojotlhe jwa me, ne? but like I said, I haven’t written in setswana in years (and even then, I struggled because my school really didn’t prioritize my setswana education (a story for another day)). Anyway, I’m not as practiced as I’d like to be and my sense of sentence/word construction is in the struggle. I therefore invite anyone who wants to to suggest edits and corrections to this piece to do so. I would really appreciate it.
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