MAKANI AAYEEME AMUTWE UULI ACIVWUMBYO
Nzila Zikonzya Kutupa Kukkomana Mubuumi
“Ndiyookkomana ndaakukwatwa alimwi akuba abana.”
“Ndiyookkomana ndaakuba aŋanda yangu.”
“Ndiyookkomana ndaakujana mulimo uulya.”
“Ndiyookkomana ciindi . . .”
SENA kuli nomwakalimvwide boobu? Alimwi ciindi nomwakacijana eeco ncomwakali kuyanda, sena lukkomano lwanu lwakazumanana? Naa lwakatalika kumana? Masimpe, ikujana cintu ncomwali kuyanda kulakonzya kumupa kukkomana, pele lukkomano luli boobo lulakonzya kumana cakufwambaana. Lukkomano lwini-lwini taluyeeme buyo azintu muntu nzyajisi. Muciindi caboobo, mbubwenya mbuli buumi buli kabotu, lukkomano lwini-lwini luyeeme atwaambo tusiyene-siyene.
Muntu umwi aumwi ulilibedelede. Cintu icikonzya kumukkomanisya nywebo, tacikonzyi kumukkomanisya umwi. Kuyungizya waawo, tobantu tulacinca mbotuyaabukomena. Pele, bumboni butondezya kuti zintu zimwi ziliswaangene kapati alukkomano. Mucikozyanyo, lukkomano lwini-lwini luliswaangene akukkutila, kutaba amunyono, kutondezya luyando kuli bamwi, kuliyumya alimwi ambotulimvwa. Atubone kaambo ncocili boobo.
1. AMUKKUTILE
Muntu umwi musongo mumakani aabuumi bwabantu wakaamba kuti, ‘mali alakwabilila.’ Pele alimwi wakalemba kuti: “Muntu uuyandisya nsiliva takakkutili ansiliva pe, awalo muntu uuyandisya buvwubi takakkutili azyeezyo nzyajana. Acalo eeci ncabuyo.” (Mukambausi 5:10; 7:12) Ncinzi ncaakali kupandulula? Nokuba kuti tuyandika mali kutegwa tuzumanane kupona, tweelede kubutantamuka busyaacivwulemwangu, nkaambo buloongelezya! Mwami Solomoni wamu Israyeli yansiku, wakasola kuti abone naa buvwubi alimwi abuumi bwaatala inga bwamuletela lukkomano lwini-lwini. Wakalemba kuti: “Tiindakaliimya cintu cili coonse ncondakali kuyanda. Kunyina nindakakasya moyo wangu kulikondelezya kuli koonse.”—Mukambausi 1:13; 2:10.
Akaambo kakuti Solomoni wakalijisi lubono lunji, wakaliyakila maanda, wakalilimina myuunda yeebeka, wakapanga mazyiba aamaanzi alimwi wakaba ababelesi banji. Kufwumbwa ncaakali kuyanda, wakali kucijana. Ncinzi ncaakaiya? Zintu nzyaakajana zyakamupa kukkomana, pele kutali kwaciindi cilamfwu. Wakaamba kuti: “Ndakabona kuti zyoonse zyakali zyabuyo, nkutandaanya buyo muwo.” Alimwi buya tanaakacili kubukkomanina buumi. (Mukambausi 2:11, 17, 18) Inzya, Solomoni wakaiya kuti buumi bwakuyanda kulikkomanisya bupa muntu kutyompwa alimwi akutakkutila. *
Sena lwiiyo lwamazuba aano luleendelana abusongo oobu bwakaindi? Cibalo icakalembwa mumagazini yakuti Journal of Happiness Studies cakaamba kuti, “ikuti muntu wazijana zintu ziyandika mubuumi, kuba amali manji takukonzyi kumupa kukkomana.” Buvwuntauzi bumwi butondezya kuti bantu balaleka kuba alukkomano ikuti babikkila maano kapati kuba azintu zinji zyakumubili, akuleka kubikkila maano kuzintu zyakumuuya.
NJIISYO YAMU BBAIBBELE: “Ibukkale bwanu butabi bwakuyandisya mali pe, pele amukkutile azintu nzyomujisi lino.”—Bahebrayo 13:5.
2. MUTABI AMUNYONO
Kuba amunyono caamba “kutakkomana akaambo kazintu zibotu nzyajisi umwi, alimwi akuba aluyandisisyo lwakuba azintu nzizyonya eezyo.” Mbubwenya mbuli bulwazi butasilikiki, munyono ulakonzya kubunyonganya buumi bwamuntu akumupa kutakkomana. Mbuti munyono mboukonzya kukomena? Mbuti mbotukonzya kuzyiba kuti tulilijisi penzi eeli? Alimwi mbuti mbotukonzya kulilwana?
Ibbuku litegwa Encyclopedia of Social Psychology lyaamba kuti kanji-kanji bantu inga balaba amunyono kubantu mbobeelene limwi, ambweni mumyaka, luzyibo, naa mulimo. Mucikozyanyo, musambazi takonzyi kuba amunyono kumuntu uulaampuwo mumafilimu. Pele ulakonzya kuba amunyono kumusambazinyina uumwiinda.
Mucikozyanyo: Basilutwe bapati bamwi mu Persia yansiku bakali kunyonokela silutwenyina musongo Daniele ikutali mwami. Kutondezya kuti tiibakakkomene, mane buya bakali kuyanda kumujaya Daniele! Pele makanze aabo tanaakazwidilila. (Daniele 6:1-24) Bbuku lya encyclopedia alimwi lyaamba kuti: “Cilayandika kuzyiba kuti munyono upa muntu kuyanda kucisa bamwi. Lunya oolu lutondezya kaambo munyono ncowakajatikizyidwe munkondo izyakali kucitika kaindi.” *
Munyono ulakonzya kupa muntu kutakkomana azintu zibotu mubuumi
Mbuti mbomukonzya kuzyiba kuti mulijisi munyono? Amulibuzye kuti: ‘Sena kuzwidilila kwamweenzuma kulandikkomanisya naa kulandicima? Ikuti mwanookwesu, sicikoloma musongo, naa ngotubeleka limwi waalilwa munzila imwi, sena ndilausa naa ndilakkomana?’ Ikuti mwaingula kuti ‘ndilacimwa,’ kumubuzyo wakusaanguna akuti ‘ndilakkomana’ kumubuzyo wabili, ambweni mulijisi munyono. (Matalikilo 26:12-14) Bbuku litegwa Encyclopedia of Social Psychology alimwi lyaamba kuti “munyono ulakonzya kupa muntu kutakkomana azintu zibotu mubuumi alimwi akuleka kulumba zipego zinji mubuumi. . . . Tumpenda tuli boobo tatuleti lukkomano.”
Tulakonzya kuulwana munyono kwiinda mukuba bantu balicesya ncobeni, calo icitugwasya kubona mboziyandika zintu nzyobakonzya kucita bamwi alimwi akulumba bube bwabo bubotu. Ibbaibbele lyaamba kuti: “Mutaciti cintu cili coonse amuuya wakuzwangana naa cakulisumpula, pele amucite zintu zyoonse cakulicesya akubona bamwi kuti balamwiinda.”—Bafilipi 2:3.
NJIISYO YAMU BBAIBBELE: “Tutalisumpuli pe, tutabusyi mizundano akati kesu, alimwi tutafwidilani munyono.”—Bagalatiya 5:26.
3. AMUBAYANDE BANTU
Ibbuku litegwa Social Psychology lyaamba kuti: “Lukkomano ndobajana bantu mubuumi kujatikizya zilongwe zyabo ndupati kwiinda lukkomano ndobajana akaambo kamulimo wabo, mali, busena nkobakkala naa buumi.” Munzila imwi, kutegwa muntu akkomane ncobeni, weelede kutondezya alimwi akutondezyegwa luyando. Sikulemba Bbaibbele umwi wakaamba kuti: “Kuti kanditajisi luyando, ndili wabuyo.”—1 Bakorinto 13:2.
Tatumukide pe kuba aluyando. Mucikozyanyo, Vanessa wakajisi bausyi ibakali kubelesya majwi mabi alimwi ibakali bacakolwa. Ciindi Vanessa naakajisi myaka iili 14 yakuzyalwa, wakatija aŋanda akutalika kukkala amikwasyi iimbi alimwi amukadumba mwalo mwaakatalika kulomba lugwasyo kuli Leza. Kumane, ambweni kabuli bwiinguzi kumipailo yakwe, wakatalika kukkala amukwasyi umwi iwakali kupona kweelana anjiisyo yamu Bbaibbele yakuti “luyando lulakkazika moyo alimwi lulaaluzyalo.” (1 Bakorinto 13:4) Bukkale oobu, kubikkilizya azintu nzyaakali kwiiya muciiyo cakwe ca Bbaibbele, zyakamugwasya Vanessa kutalika kulimvwa kabotu akutalika kuba aluumuno mumizeezo. Alimwi wakaamba kuti tanaakali kupasa kucikolo, pele naakapona wakatalika kupasa.
Vanessa ucipenga mumizeezo. Nokuba boobo, lino ulikkomene mulukwatano alimwi ulijisi bana bobilo basimbi.
NJIISYO YAMU BBAIBBELE: “Amulisamike luyando, nkaambo ncecaanzyo calukamantano cilondokede.”—Bakolose 3:14.
4. AMULIYUMYE
Sena kuli muntu uutajisi mapenzi mubuumi? Mbubwenya mbolyaamba Bbaibbele, kuli “ciindi cakulila” alimwi ‘aciindi cakoomoka.’ (Mukambausi 3:4) Kuliyumya muziindi zili boobu kulatugwasya kuzibona kabotu zintu ciindi camapenzi. Atulange-lange cikozyanyo caba Carol aba Mildred.
Ba Carol baciswa bulwazi bwamoongolola, syuga, bulwazi bwakubula ŋonzi alimwi akabale muliso kalo kakapa kuti liso lyakulumwensyi libaye. Nokuba boobo, baamba kuti: “Ndilasola kutatyompwa kwaciindi cilamfwu. Inga ndilalyeetezya. Pele ndilaleka kubikkila maano mbondilimvwa akulumba Leza akaambo kazintu nzyondicikonzya kucita kwaambisya nzyondicitila bamwi.”
Ba Mildred abalo baciswa malwazi aali mbwaabede, alo aabikkilizya abulwazi bwamafwuwa, kkansa yakunkolo, alimwi asyuga. Mbubwenya mbuli ba Carol, abalo ba Mildred tababikkili kapati maano kumapenzi ngobajisi. Bakalemba kuti: “Ndaiya kuyanda bantu alimwi akubaumbulizya nobaciswa, eeci cilandigwasya andime. Alimwi buya, ciindi nonduumbulizya bamwi, inga tandilibiliki kujatikizya mapenzi aangu.”
Nokuba kuti bamakaintu aaba bobilo balabuyanda busilisi buli kabotu, tababikkili kapati maano kubuzumi bwabo, pele babikkila maano mbobacibelesya ciindi cabo. Akaambo kaceeci balijisi lukkomano lwalo ndobatakonzyi kunyangwa amuntu uuli woonse. Kuyungizya waawo, balayandwa kapati abamwi alimwi balabakulwaizya bantu bambi ibali mumasunko aasiyene-siyene.
NJIISYO YAMU BBAIBBELE: “Ulikkomene muntu ooyo uuzumanana kuliyumya mumasunko, nkaambo ikuti naa Leza wamukkomanina uyootambula musini wabuumi.”—Jakobo 1:12.
Ikuti busongo bwamu Bbaibbele bwatobelwa, “ncisamu cabuumi kulibaabo babujata, alimwi aabo bazumanana kubujatisya baambwa kuti balikkomene.” (Tusimpi 3:13-18) Sena inga tiimwayanda kukajana kasimpe aako nobeni kwiinda mukubelesya busongo ibuli mu Bbaibbele? Kayi, Sikwaanza bbuku eeli lisetekene, alimwi iwiitwa kuti “Leza uukkomene,” uyanda kuti andinywe mukkomane.—1 Timoteyo 1:11.
^ par. 11 Cibalo caamba makani aakamucitikila Solomoni cilajanika mulugwalo lwa Mukambausi 2:1-11.
^ par. 17 Cikozyanyo cibotu cakaindi cijatikizya Jesu Kristo. Lugwalo lwa Marko 15:10 lwaamba kuti “akaambo kamunyono” basilutwe babapaizi bakaaba Jesu kutegwa ajaigwe.
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