title:  Secret Service Just Killed The Fun: No Open Carry At The GOP Convention
text: Despite a petition calling for guns to be allowed at the upcoming Republican National Convention in Cleveland, Ohio, accumulating more than 46,000 signatures, the Secret Service has killed what many see as the perfect scenario for natural selection to do its job. This masterful piece of trolling started as a tongue-in-cheek statement about how  responsible gun owners  are allowed to place everyone at risk everywhere else, yet enjoy safety from armed maniacs whenever they congregate   but the right wing began to take it seriously, demanding that their rights not be infringed.On Monday, the killjoys in the Secret Service announced that attendees will not be permitted to carry their Confidence on their hips at the convention   no matter how badly quite literally everybody (even Donald Trump) wants it.Secret Service spokesman Robert Hoback explained that  only authorized law enforcement personnel  working with the agency will be allowed to bring their weapons inside. Individuals determined to be carrying firearms will not be allowed past a predetermined outer perimeter checkpoint, regardless of whether they possess a ticket to the event,  Hoback told The Hill, explaining that everyone else will have to leave the Second Amendment freedumbs at the door.This, of course, was a huge disappointment to people who really wanted to see how this sort of thing would play out, with some even suggesting crowdfunding an open bar just to help things along.     We must take a stand. We cannot allow the national nominating convention of the party of Lincoln and Reagan to be hijacked by weakness and political correctness,  the hilarious petition reads.  The policies of the Quicken Loans Arena do not supersede the rights given to us by our Creator in the U.S. Constitution. This is a direct affront to the Second Amendment and puts all attendees at risk,  the petitioner writes in his attempt to create chaos simply by allowing violent, gun-obsessed Republicans to be themselves.Despite the clearly satirical nature of the petition, Donald Trump stands behind it, though he wants to  read the fine print  before his supporters are allowed to carry guns   which is probably a good idea. The RNC, of course, jumped on the chance to evade any responsibility for the very, very bad idea it would be to allow right-wingers to carry guns into what will almost certainly be a volatile environment: The Republican Party has been and will continue to be a staunch supporter of the Second amendment,  said convention spokeswoman Kirsten Kukowski.  It is in our platform and is strongly supported by our candidates.The Republican National Convention is a National Special Security Event which means the Secret Service is the lead agency and we will defer to their planning as it relates to safety and security of the convention. This may seem surprising to hear from us, but the Secret Service should reconsider. If the people want Republicans to be able to carry their guns at the convention, they should be allowed. After all, we have to deal with them in restaurants, grocery stores, schools, hospitals, and anywhere else guns should not be allowed. It would be nice for them to experience what they force the rest of us to deal with on a daily basis for once.If someone is hurt or killed, it s just the  price of freedom.  Isn t that what they say whenever a child dies in a completely preventable shooting?Featured image via Dallas News