title: life  pieces of meat i have seen held and in one case gone on vacation with
text:  steps to rolling the perfect joint posted today looking to enjoy a little bit of relaxation youll probably want to practice the lost art of joint rolling with just  easy steps anyone can roll the perfect joint but enjoy responsibly step  fill the tub step  get the weedthe dark fruit the bush that grows in the shadow of the valley of the shadow of weed the jesters hiccup the liquid daydream fresh from the icecube tray the wisdom tooth of the vegetables ogre israeli nightshade the arizona iced tea of drugs the dad baffler the sweet teen poison the sickly crop of the wind farm the flower the devil dares not pickout of your fridge set it aside step  a filter keeps fire from squirming into your throat and laying its eggs in your brainstem build the filter by pouring a mixture of egg whites and ground hen bones into a filter mold and leave it at your parents house over a long weekend to set step  get your rolling paper by stripping a few inches of skin off the paper wretch with a hot carrot peeler it may take a few tries to get a good swath step  to break up the weed place it on an active fault line in a bowl full of gravel step  once a major tectonic event has ground your weed pound it into a paste using a book about a curious incident step  wrap your index finger in paper and feed the weed paste into your port a chilly sensation means your body has accepted the paste and will pass it on a prickling sensation means your body has rejected the paste and will hopefully pee it out someday step  seal the joint by licking your paperedup finger like a naughty little thing youre filthy arent you step  remove finger twist paper and voilà the perfect joint for any mouth step  dunk the joint in the tub so you arent tempted to smoke it and become insane start over at step one 
  dont get discouraged if you dont get it right on the first try like all things in life practice makes perfect