title: blog if donald trump pardons me i would be honored to serve as secretary of agriculture
text: email the majesty of nature is aweinspiring and dont worry weve got plenty of those monkeys with the giant red asses  were not going to leave you hanging wondering when the swollen red asses are going to show up heres one monkey ass to start this list of beautiful nature photos off right  elsewhere in nature the blue whale is the largest animal in earths history even bigger than the dinosaurs and if you think we blew our entire redassed money wad on that first one then you are seriously mistaken  the alaskan wood frog has the amazing ability to freeze in winter and thaw itself out when the weather gets warm again it sounds like something out of science fiction and while it isnt a hulking red monkey ass its still an impressive example of the power of evolution  no way wed skimp on monkeys with bulbous red buttocks thats not how we treat our readers when we promise inflamed red monkey asses we deliver in spades feast your eyes on these remarkable specimens  more monkeys with beaconlike red asses are coming up but in the meantime here is the hummingbird moth at first glance youd mistake it for a bird but its actually an insect that happens to look like a hummingbird which is pretty cool if you think about it  once again its time to behold red monkey ass and this time theres a whole gaggle of monkeys with blindingly bright asses but this isnt the end of the red assfest no siree this we promise  chimpanzees are our closest cousins in nature with an almost humanlike intelligence they sadly were not blessed with a brightred ass but are smart enough to use simple tools like sticks to catch termites you cant help but wonder about humanitys place in nature when you see a creature so similar to us  weve got a real showstopper of a red ass on deck but first lets do our due diligence and check out the galápagos tortoise it can live over  years incredible  here we go this monkey has a truly huge red ass much bigger and redder than any ass weve seen before we are fortunate to share a planet with a bloated red miracle as beautiful as this monkeys breathtaking ass red monkey asses are nature at its finest and we hope youve had your fill of them