title: they said what find out what miles teller kelly slater and meghan markle have to say
text: i had a garage sale today and a number of people came and bought stuff most of them left here are the ones who are still sticking around  the guy who bought my lamp 
  i expected the guy who bought my lamp to leave after he bought my lamp but he did not leave he sat down on my lawn and started reading the newspaper i went up to him and asked him if he needed help with anything and he said nope been saving my appetite all day i didnt really know what that meant but someone had a question about my foosball table at that moment so i didnt have time to get clarification on that  the couple who didnt buy anything but spent a lot of time browsing my box of national geographic sand then got in their car and took a nap 
  these people seemed really into my national geographic s so i was pretty surprised when they decided not to buy them i was also surprised when instead of leaving they just got in their car and started napping theyre still asleep and theres a little postit on their window that says wake us up when its ready  the old woman who bought my vacuum 
  when the old lady who bought my vacuum offered to pay for my vacuum by vacuuming my house i thought it was a little odd but also kind of nice my place is a little dusty these days and definitely could use a good vacuuming so i said yes i wish that she had left after she finished vacuuming my house she is now in the kitchen and has been vacuuming the same corner for the last  minutes plus she keeps chiming in on how to make the pasta sauce i have to admit she did a pretty good job cleaning my house though i dont know how to ask her to leave without sounding rude  the lady who bought a plate a fork and a knife 
  i assumed this woman bought these items for her own home but its been three hours and she is just standing by the front door sneaking peeks at the kitchen through the window this is becoming stressful  the kid who bought my toaster even though i told him it was broken and then handed me a list of his allergies 
  when this kid asked me how much i wanted for the toaster i was upfront about the fact that it was broken but that didnt matter to him he bought the thing for  cents and then handed me a list of allergies he had now he is sitting out on the lawn along with the guy who bought my lamp and i think theyre working on a crossword puzzle together i really dont think i have enough ingredients to make food for all these people also there are a lot of allergies on this list  the older gentleman who brought a raw steak to my garage sale and then bought a coatrack 
  i dont know why the old man who bought the coatrack brought a raw steak to my garage sale after he purchased the coatrack he placed the raw steak in a dish to marinate then put it in my garage fridge i asked him what he was doing and he said gotta marinate this bad boy for dos horas compadre buon appetito he is still here and his steak is still marinating overall id say the garage sale itself was a success because i made about  but it ended hours ago and all these people have not left yet and i dont know what to do