title: climate change has already altered nearly every ecosystem on earth
text: email 
  why does everyone think that presidential campaigns are about issues when anyone over the age of consent knows they are all about sex but it says a lot about the lasting power of viagra that this is still the case when we have a couple of seventyyearolds on the ballot  for an election lasting more than four years please call your doctor  
  in last weeks newspaper there was a report on the tenth or eleventh woman i have lost track to come forward to say that donald trump made suggestive and inappropriate advances to her during a golf tournament that took place about ten years ago 
  the woman in question is jessica drake who during her press conference announced that at the time of the tournament she was working in the the adult industry thats what people magazine calls porn for wicked pictures the th century fox of gang banging when the randy donald kissed and hugged her in his room 
  trump was already in his pajamas when she knocked on his door together with two friends normally in the adult business when three porn stars knock on your hotel door its considered foreplay 
  when trumps effusive greeting of miss drake did not lead to more snuggling let alone the suggestion to preview some of her work on the hotel television he offered her  to satisfy his suite dreams 
  drake again demurred saying that the next morning she needed to get back to los angeles for work by that point in her career she had already notched screen credits for extreme doggie and fornocopia i would mention other titles but as they say at the new york post  this is a family newspaper 
  that rejection prompted donald to offer jessica an early morning ride of shame on his trump airliner back to la which still didnt turn the trick    
  then last week in the presence of her lawyer gloria allred the perry mason of many cases against bill cosby miss drake tearfully repeated in primetime her shock and dismay that mr trump had tried to take liberties with her reputation which after all includes the  adult video news award for the best double penetration sex scene in her classic work fallen 
  drake said she was coming forward now to stand in solidarity with the other women trump has manhandled although there were suggestions that her outing was timed to coincide with the launch of drakes new online store where devoted viewers can purchase such classics as her guide to bdsm for beginners among other titles 
  normally scenes such as the one i am describing would be consigned to john oliver monty python or saturday night live  but in the new normal of presidential politics even miss drake gets a respectful hearing on the issues 
  for example the next day the huffington post reported woman says trump sexually assaulted her offered her  for sex 
  the deadpan new york times wrote ms drake who appeared saturday with the womens rights lawyer gloria allred said mr trump had hugged and kissed her and the other women without permission 
  the headline in new york magazine read adult actress jessica drake details trump assault blasts him for uncontrollable misogyny 
  look i have no doubt that trump is a pig who routinely gropes and propositions women but since when does the press in a presidential election have to source its stories in the adult industry    
  sadly the answer to this question dates to winter  when bill and hillary clinton figured out that unless a presidential candidate has a sexual storyline few of the voters will pay much attention to their positions on nuclear disarmament or welfare reform 
  during the  super bowl the clintons appeared on a halftime special of  minutes to deny jointly bill that allegation is false  that he had ever had an affair with gennifer flowers who lived in little rock arkansas when bill was governor and often out jogging 
  in this vaudeville performance hillary played the straight man adding you know im not sitting heresome little woman standing by my man like tammy wynette at least she didnt reference the eagles 
  only in  under oath in a sworn deposition did bill admit to having a year affair with ms flowers but neither her allegations in  nor his lying about it cost him the election that year 
  just the opposite clintons wanderlust might have won him sympathy among the voters no strangers to sexual boredom who found they had more in common with a softshell baptist bill than an uptight protestant george hw bush 
  nor did clintons impeachment in  for lying about his affair with monica lewinsky under oath in the paula jones case hurt his postpresidential career worth  million  or the electoral prospects of his wife in  
  but it did turn sexuality into a mainstream presidential campaign issue which is one of the reasons why this years race seems only to be about sex    
  no doubt the clintons do find some delicious irony in trumps groping charges as payback for what they view as the republican use of sexuality to impeach bill in  and in  for the gop plan to make his many adulterous affairs fair game for their campaign soundbites cut to an online image of the white house and over it a fading picture of bill smoking a cigar with the caption here we go again 
  without the pageantloving casino operating donald trump as the republican nominee in  hillary clinton could well have been vulnerable on the sexual front with bills mistresses steady fodder for negatives ads and the many allegations from his scorned lovers that hillary organized the slutshaming 
  instead of the  election turning on hillarys marriage to hugh hefners doppelgänger the storyline that has played best in the media is donalds secret life as a groper 
  the press actually has given trump a pass for his adultery which produced all those wonderful children but zeroed in on his groping in part because he confessed to it on an nbc videotape and also becausethink of ratingsgropers belong in the same basket of deplorables as child abusers and others lurking on subways crowed elevators or near schoolyards 
  best of all for the clintons politically anyway is that the charge of groping is impossible for trump to refute even denying it sounds sleazy 
  and it colors all aspects of the campaign to wit the new york times headline when at gettysburg trump outlined his vision for america donald trump pledges to heal divisions and sue his accusers    
  for its mudslinging i am sure the trump campaign has spent many long hours brainstorming how to tar hillary as a lesbian but even that innuendo has fallen flat despite the rumor mongering that shes in a boston marriage with her assistant huma abedin whose husband anthony weiner is otherwise distracted in high school chat rooms 
  several of bills former lovers sally miller dolly kyle and flowers have tried to play up bills pillow talk that hillary prefers the nighttime company of women but none of these allegations have gone further than infowars or the supermarket press  hillary hit man tells all  
  nor have outofwedlock children a staple of the  campaign as was chanted to grover cleveland  ma ma where  s my pa  gotten much play in this years presidential race 
  trump and his casino gumshoes have put considerable effort into tracking down the rumor that danney williams is bill clintons illegitimate son by a little rock prostitute named bobbie ann williams 
  trump invited danney a sympathetic man to the third presidential debate as if to press on bill a scarlet letter despite williams looking very much like president bill the story got no more traction than did the news that malik obama the presidents shunned halfbrother is supporting trump he too got a debate invitation to sit in the box presumably marked shame 
  also in the dustbin of history are the allegations that flowers aborted bills baby in  and the whispering campaign a great political standby when proof is elusive that chelsea is the product of an affair between hillary and her then law firm colleague webb hubbell 
  the williams and hubbell stories come with some convincing internet similarities at least in the photographs although in both cases politically this rumor milling whiplashed against trump as voters have only equated such tawdry allegations with his birther past something that has stuck as campaign mud    
  technically birtherism doest directly involve sex although it lingers on its fringes as it speaks to barack obamas illegitimacy his foreign allegiances and possibly disputed paternity including the claim that frank marshall davis was actually obamas biological father another subterranean creed of trumpism 
  again the documentary proof is a series of lookalike photographs as close as the internet gets to dna that davis was an american communist works well in the campaign as it suggests the origins of obamas political genetic code 
  ironically for all his efforts at smear trump came out the loser in the debates when hillary nailed him to birtherism which has become a convenient code word for trumps racism misogyny and intolerance of immigrants especially muslims 
  nor in response did trump have any luck in linking the birther movement to clintons  campaign when according to donald consiglierejournalist sidney blumenthal delighted in the suggestion that barack was born in kenya 
  instead the debate claim only made trump look disingenuous clinton got a pass on what her campaign may or may not have insinuated in  and at this point no one cares but voters do remember trump as the imperial wizard of birtherism    
  republicans can only blame themselves for wanting to divide the electorate in  along lines of sexual preference or deviance although this strategy was based on hillary being the democratic nominee and anyone other than trump standing for the republicans 
  had the gop nominee been carly fiorina jeb bush or john kasich clinton inc might well have been vulnerable to possible storylines about infidelity illegitimacy and rape cue up the paula jones description of bill during a business meeting exposing himself in a little rock hotel and settling her lawsuit for  
  instead the republicans went with the polyamorous trump who in addition to three marriages has bragged on morning radio about his success with young women and who since  has been leering at miss universe contestantsa bit like austin powers  shall we shag now or shall we shag later  
  with trumps resumé of creepy perversion you might have thought that the republicans would drop sexual misconduct from the electoral playbook instead they doubled down to make the case that both clintons if elected would turn the white house into a strip club 
  not only did the clintons shrug off such innuendo but in response they said in effect if they did it would be to cater to the likes of players such as donald j trump leisure suit and open collar optional    
  for the momentand i cant see anything changing in the last days of the campaignthe accepted wisdom of most front pages is that donald trump has groped as many women as tiger woods has watched pole dancing in vegas even the gallery of their women looks about the same 
  conversely few voters seem to care that bill might have forced himself on several women or that hillary helped to cover up his brutality thats a narrative of the s which is perhaps the last time austin danger trump read the newspaper  ive been frozen for  years ive got to see if my bits and pieces are still working  
  for most voters in  names such as kathleen willey or juanita broaddrick are as lost in time as nan britton who just before the  election bore a love child with then candidate senator warren harding 
  britton and the child got republican hush money and a sad little house in asbury park new jersey after harding won she was invited to the white house but their affair so to speak was kept in the closet    
  if you think about elections as political sitcoms in  the kennedys had to run as rob and laura petrie on the dick van dyke show  complete with twin beds long flannel pajamas and prudent kisses on the cheek to say goodnight even if the jfk reality show would make trump bill clinton and tiger look like apprentices at adultery 
  come  only something that resembles modern family and a desperatehousewives reality show can crack network primetime and who better to put on air than the clintons with their dallas like money communal sexuality and more illicit storylines than csi  
  for more than twenty years bill and hillary have been bringing us seasons of lust affairs ididnothavesexwiththatwoman vince foster travelgate foundation slush funds basement servers commodity trading whitewater bosnian snipers paytoplay benghazi lost emails and the like and the ratings only continue to go up 
  sure the apprentice was fun for a few episodes but the sameness of insulting young people grew tedious how is that supposed to compete with bill making a pass at huma while her husband goes to prison for airing his junk and chelsea finding out about her real father next on the clintons