text: "FBI! Hands in the air, asshole!" Lisa stormed down the hall with her firearm raised in both hands. She glanced briefly at Johnny as he scooted backward across the floor and propped himself up against the exterior wall of the kitchen.
  
  "He's…in there—"
  
  The Red Boar fired again and the bullet crashed into the back wall of the kitchen. Lisa darted around the corner and fired two shots.
  
  Close behind her were two Kilomeas and a half-wizard and all three of them summoned attack spells to help cover her against the Red Boar.
  
  "Drop the weapon!" she shouted. Two more shots were fired and spewed plaster and wood chips in every direction.
  
  The scarred gray magical roared and fired more shots before he finally switched to flinging spells.
  
  "Get him!"
  
  "Shit, duck!"
  
  "Lady, watch out!"
  
  Johnny grimaced as he clapped his hand against the bullet wound in his belly. The hallway was slick with his blood. That sounds like Yarren and Percy. How'd they get here?
  
  The glass coffee table shattered under someone's weight.
  
  "Fuck! Ev!"
  
  "I said hands up!" Lisa shouted again. She launched another fireball at the Red Boar and he bellowed when it struck him in the opposite shoulder. "Don't make me—ah!"
  
  She catapulted toward the hallway and skidded across the floor, clutching her left shoulder.
  
  "Lisa." Johnny tried to shout it, but it wouldn't come out any louder than a low mumble.
  
  Without noticing the dwarf bleeding out on the floor, she raised her service weapon from where she had landed and fired again.
  
  The Red Boar roared and flung aside the Kilomeas storming toward him. Evan summoned a dark spell of crackling, electric-blue light that glanced off their adversary's massive chest and sent him reeling into the armchair. The intruder launched a red bolt of sizzling light into the half-wizard's gut. Evan hurtled into the white leather couch and almost knocked it over.
  
  "What the hell?" Luther raised his head off the floor, blinked, then struggled to his feet. "Rex. Rex! Wake up! There's—" The smaller hound leapt away from the Red Boar's flailing legs as the magical pushed himself out of the armchair. "Shit. Johnny! Johnny, where are you?"
  
  The hound's wild barking snapped Rex out of his groggy sleep. "Holy shit. Kilomeas, bro. Those ungrateful hairy bastards!" He launched himself at Yarren and tackled him as the Kilomea unleashed a shot of strobing copper light. It went wild and crashed into the ceiling instead of the gray magical stampeding through the suite.
  
  "The gray guy!" Lisa shouted as she flung another fireball. "The big guy, Rex!"
  
  "What? Oh, shit." The larger hound leapt off Yarren's chest and spun to snarl at the Red Boar. "Damn, he is big."
  
  Barking madly, Luther darted beneath launched spells and their adversary's huge feet to snap at the guy's heels. Percy's next magical attack cracked against the side of the gray magical's face and thrust him back. He crashed into the armchair again and landed halfway in the seat with one leg dangling over the armrest.
  
  "Johnny! He has your knife!" Luther leapt onto the Red Boar's thigh and clamped his jaws down around the blade's handle. With a vicious jerk of his head, he ripped the blade free and blood sprayed all over the armchair and the living area.
  
  The large magical roared and slapped at the hound, but Luther had already leapt away. "Johnny! Johnny, where are you? I have your knife!"
  
  "Get him, bro!" Rex shouted, snarling and barking.
  
  "Who?" Luther whipped his head back toward the Red Boar, and the blade pierced the inside of the magical's thigh.
  
  "Fucking dog!" He swatted at Luther and barely missed the hound's head, and Lisa fired another fireball at the intruder.
  
  "Who you calling a fucking dog, bozo?" The hound whipped his head back again and stabbed their adversary in the calf before he darted away, his jaws fixed firmly around the blade's handle. "Did anyone teach you manners?"
  
  The gray magical rose from the armchair and stumbled forward, trying to walk on his injured legs. Luther ducked and spun in a circle. "Seriously, has anyone seen Johnny? This is his."
  
  Yarren launched a fireball at the Red Boar, who ducked wildly and fell to his hands and knees on the floor.
  
  "Luther, watch out!" Rex shouted.
  
  "Huh?" The smaller hound whirled with wide eyes, and the blade sliced across the enemy magical's already scarred face. He bellowed, clapped one hand to his cheek, and swiped at Luther with the other. "Hey, back up, two-legs. What the hell?"
  
  In the hallway, Johnny had managed to pull himself to his feet and supported himself on the half-wall into the kitchen. Grunting with the effort, he slapped his hand down on the tranquilizer gun. The bag of pastries toppled and spilled all over the counter and kitchen floor when he whipped his modified weapon off the granite. He turned and struggled to step down the hall to get a clear shot into the living area.
  
  "Luther!" Lisa shouted. "Get out of there!"
  
  "Why is everyone yelling at me, huh?" Luther trotted around the Red Boar and skittered sideways when the huge magical swiped at him again. "Hey, hands off, bud. Johnny! Johnny, where the hell are you?" When he turned, the blade in his mouth buried itself in the Red Boar's pectoral muscle and was ripped out again. "This guy's lost his mind!"
  
  With a roar, the wounded magical reared back on his knees and lunged at Luther and the knife.
  
  Johnny squeezed off all four remaining rounds in the tranquilizer gun in quick succession. The loud pop wasn't nearly as satisfying as the echo of a regular pistol, but the shots found their marks in the Red Boar's neck and chest.
  
  "Fucking dwarf!" The intruder snarled and pushed shakily to his feet. "I'll rip your—"
  
  His wide glowing eyes rolled back in his head. One massive foot came down on the area rug with a thump before he fell like a giant sack of bricks. His chest landed first and the shattered glass of the broken coffee table crunched beneath him and his scarred face followed with a muffled thud. A snort escaped him before he sagged completely.
  
  "Whoa." Luther stepped away from the unconscious magical, his tail straight up in the air. "Holy shit, guys. He's bleeding." The hound sat, and Johnny's blood-stained utility knife clattered to the floor when he licked his muzzle. "Was that me?"
  
  "Good work, boy." The dwarf grunted and staggered against the far wall of the living area. His back thumped against it and he slid to the floor with a groan, leaving a thick streak of blood behind him.
  
  "Johnny." Lisa hurried toward him, limping and clutching her left shoulder. "Oh, jeez. He shot you."
  
  "Thanks, darlin' although that's a given at this point."
  
  "I tried to get here as fast as I could. I'm so sorry."
  
  "I ain't—"
  
  "Those fucking assholes set me up too." She batted his hand aside and pulled up his shirt to get a better look at the wound. "They told me they were delivering a package this morning and instead, Kellen had me standing out front with a huge damn target on my back. I have never in my entire career spent so much time convincing state police officers I'm exactly who I say I am."
  
  "Police?" Johnny grimaced when the soft, tingling warmth of Lisa's Light Elf healing magic did what it could for the bullet wound. The pain and a searing heat quickly followed.
  
  "Yeah. Someone hacked into Stephanie Wyndom's fake records and gave her an open arrest warrant on top of it. I doubt they picked up that it was all fake, but it held me back almost half an hour—"
  
  "Darlin', I appreciate the healin' attention. And the recap." He removed her hand from where it hovered over his wound. "But I ain't sure either of them's gonna do the trick here."
  
  "Shit, Johnny. The bleeding's still bad. I thought I could do more."
  
  "Naw, this should do until we get some bandages or somethin'."
  
  "This might help." Yarren stepped toward them down the hall and slid his hand into the breast pocket of his uniform work shirt, which was dotted with a few flecks of the Red Boar's blood and had one sleeve ripped off at the shoulder and dangling by a thread in the armpit. The Kilomea pulled out a small, nondescript packet and hunkered down to offer it to the dwarf.
  
  "What's this?"
  
  "Somethin' we like to keep on us in the yard," Percy grumbled as he dusted glass shards and plaster off his shirt. "A lotta guys get hurt on the job, and it doesn't exactly go over well with the higher-ups when they get so many reports. Rocky gives ʼem out like candy. It's a Kilomea family secret or some shit."
  
  "I ain't takin' drugs, fellas."
  
  "Neither do we." Yarren ripped the top of the packet open and nodded at Johnny's bleeding gut. "You gotta pour it on."
  
  "Shit." The dwarf took the packet and upended it over the wound. Silver-white powder poured out and instantly sizzled and sparked occasionally as it mixed with his blood and soaked deeper into the bullet hole. "Aw, shit!"
  
  "Yeah, it packs a punch, huh?" Evan joined them, holding the wadded end of his shirtsleeve against his bleeding nose. One of the half-wizard's eyes was blue and purple and almost swollen shut. "But it gets the job done."
  
  "If there's still a bullet in there, you should go to the hospital," Percy suggested.
  
  "No." Johnny grunted and forced himself to watch the rest of the Kilomea healing powder penetrate his gut and spark all over his insides. When it finally stopped, so did the bleeding. He glanced behind him at the smear of blood on the wall and shook his head. "The bullet went through."
  
  "Still, that's a lot of—"
  
  "No hospitals. I ain't fixin' to lay up in a damn bed with a bunch of docs for humans tellin' me what I can and can't do with my own damn self. How long does this stuff hold?"
  
  Percy and Yarren glanced at each other. "Long enough to stop the bleeding so you can get to a hospital. Probably longer if you take it easy for a few days."
  
  "Sure. Right after I finish what I started." Johnny braced a hand against the blood-smeared wall behind him and pushed to his feet.
  
  Lisa reached toward him. "Johnny, I don't think—"
  
  "I know you don't think it's a good idea, darlin'. That don't mean I ain't doin' it." A wave of dizziness washed over him to join the dull throb in his gut, and he swayed before he steadied himself against the wall again. "I suppose I oughtta get a bigger suitcase and start carryin' my damn first-aid kid with me."
  
  "Ooh, yeah, Johnny." Rex padded toward his master, stepping delicately between chunks of plaster and the shattered glass. "Like the one you have at home, right?"
  
  "That's a good one." Luther hopped onto the Red Boar's back to cross the living area, then trotted toward Johnny and the others. "There's some real good stuff in there. We love it. Thanks for leaving it open and—what?"
  
  Johnny raised an eyebrow and glanced back and forth between his hounds. "You've been sniffin' around in my med kit?"
  
  "Well, when it's there…" Luther sniffed dutifully at the streak of Johnny's blood running down the wall.
  
  "Yeah, we thought you wouldn't mind. Otherwise, you would have put that stuff away all the time. Hey, Luther. What were those treats in there we liked so much?"
  
  "I don't know, man. I can't read. The white ones. Long white ones."
  
  "Yeah, they taste like shit when you chew ʼem but you feel real nice afterward."
  
  "Jesus." Johnny shook his head. "How long have y'all been helpin' yourselves to my painkillers?"
  
  "What?" Lisa asked having missed half the conversation.
  
  "Oh, that's what they are?" Luther turned in a tight circle and tried to nip his own tail. "They're good, Johnny. Nice and mellow."
  
  "You left them out after the pup got sliced by that hog, remember?"
  
  The dwarf closed his eyes and sighed. "And regular folk with half a brain don't stop to think whether a couple of coonhounds have a tolerance built up."
  
  Lisa set a hand on Johnny's shoulder and frowned in concern. "I'm completely lost here, Johnny."
  
  "Yep." He nodded toward the Red Boar who lay face-down and bleeding in front of the armchair. "The sonofabitch drugged my hounds. He assumed it'd keep ʼem down for the count long enough for him to take me out. The damn hounds will eat everything."
  
  "He gave us a big handful, Johnny," Rex muttered.
  
  "It was awesome for like five minutes." Luther sat and licked his muzzle. "Then not so much. I think I threw up somewhere but can't remember if I cleaned it up, though."
  
  "Yeah, well now, y'all learned your lesson about takin' pills from a stranger." With a grunt, Johnny staggered across the living area, his boots crunching across broken glass and plaster.
  
  Staring after the dwarf with wide eyes, Yarren leaned toward Percy and muttered, "Who's he talking to?"
  
  "His dogs. I think."
  
  "I wouldn't have pegged him for a crazy."
  
  Percy shrugged. "Yeah, me neither. But he took a bullet to the gut. The dwarf's as tough as shit."
  
  Johnny stooped to snatch his utility knife up and grimaced at the flare of pain in his belly. He ignored it and approached the Red Boar sprawled on the floor. The blade's handle was still sticky with the gray-skinned magical's blood, but it didn't slip in the bounty hunter's clenched fist. He stooped over the Red Boar's scarred face and growled, his breath quickening. "You picked the wrong dwarf, motherfucker. Now, you're payin' for it."
  
  "Johnny?" Lisa stepped toward him. "What are you doing?"
  
  "Makin' sure this piece of shit don't squirm his way out of gettin' what's comin' to him again."
  
  "Okay, I don't think that's such a good idea right now. Especially with our…company."
  
  He looked up as Cody inched down the hallway with his camera, David close on his heels with the boom mic lifted and outstretched toward the living area. Phil peered around the corner, his eyes wide as he took in the destruction and the blood spatters. Todd panned a second camera around the hotel suite littered with bullet holes, chunks of plaster, glass, and the overturned couch.
  
  Johnny pointed at Cody and snarled. "Turn that shit off."
  
  "Keep rolling, Cody." Phil slipped around the confused Kilomeas and the half-wizard. "We're keeping this going, Johnny. This is great. Seriously good stuff. A raw look into the way Dwarf the Bounty Hunter fights and defeats his targets. We have the whole scene."
  
  "I said turn it off!" Yelling triggered another flare of pain through Johnny's gut. "What I'm fixin' to do next ain't somethin' anyone's gonna get on camera."
  
  "Johnny, don't." Lisa shook her head.
  
  "Oh, you mean like evidence?" Phil ruffled his unruly hair and nodded sagely as he gazed around the room. "We already have plenty of that."
  
  "What are you goin' on about?"
  
  The director gestured toward Cody and Dave. "We've been filming since you walked into the suite with breakfast. It looked like a big bag, too."
  
  "Sure is," Luther said from the kitchen. "Johnny, did you bring all this for us?"
  
  "Don't ask, bro. Just eat." Rex licked the spilled crumbs on the kitchen floor.
  
  "Yeah, good thinking. Ooh. Is this jelly?"
  
  Johnny turned stiffly to face Phil and the rest of the crew still filming for their damn show. "You listened in on the whole thing?"
  
  "Sure." The man smirked and spread his arms expansively. "We may be a small indie crew, but we don't skimp on quality equipment. That mic could pick up sound in the bedroom from out in the hall if we wanted it to."
  
  Lisa shrugged. "They were crowded around the door when I got here with our…backup. And thanks for that, by the way."
  
  Yarren nodded. "I have to admit it was a little weird to get your call. But I'm glad I answered."
  
  "Yeah, so are we."
  
  The dwarf glowered at the unconscious Red Boar. "All right. This ain't the day for killin' this bastard. Maybe his cellmate in max can find a reason to do it instead."
  
  Lisa exhaled a small, relieved sigh. "I'll call it in."
  
  "Uh-huh." Johnny delivered a swift kick into the side of the gray magical's head and elicited only a guttural wheeze from the Red Boar's hulking form.
  
  "Johnny."
  
  "That's the least he deserves, darlin'. Go ahead and call. Does anyone have a spare weapon on ʼem?"
  
  Yarren and his work buddies glanced at each other with vacant expressions. Lisa rolled her eyes and headed to the open door into the hall. "I'll be right back."
  
  Johnny nodded at the Kilomeas and pulled his wallet from his back pocket. "If I hand you fellas a few bills, can one of y'all run out and grab somethin' to tie this bastard up with? Rope's fine. Heavy chains are better."
  
  "Sure, man. Yeah." Evan stepped across the mess to take the few hundred dollars the dwarf held toward him. "Anything else?"
  
  "Whatever looks like it'll be fun to keep this big fucker down with while we wait for the FBI's cleanup crew. I think you'll know it when you see it."
  
  "Sure."
  
  "I wouldn't mind one of y'all stickin' around in case this shithead wakes up before we're ready."
  
  "I'll hang out." Yarren crunched across the living area and grasped the overturned leather couch to haul it upright again. "It's the least we can do."
  
  "I appreciate it."
  
  Lisa returned to the room, slipping between the film crew still rolling Johnny Walker's latest catch. She slid a new magazine into her pistol and handed it to the dwarf. "Here you go."
  
  "Thanks, darlin'."
  
  "I hope all those rounds stay right where they are."
  
  "Don't you worry yourself about it. I ain't usin' this unless it's the last option. But I'm lookin' forward to when this bastard opens his eyes and sees the wrong of end of this barrel first."
  
  "Right." She watched him stagger toward the righted couch, and a fresh wave of blood seeped from the bullet wound in his gut. "Johnny, you're still bleeding."
  
  "It ain't nothin' I can't handle, darlin'. It's fine."
  
  "Evan," Yarren called over his shoulder as he sat beside the dwarf.
  
  "Yeah?"
  
  "Grab some gauze rolls while you're out."
  
  "Sure thing. Call me if you need anything else."
  
  The half-wizard took another wide-eyed glance at the destroyed living area, then snuck past the film crew to slip into the hallway.
  
  Percy stood on the far side of the living area with his huge, hairy arms folded. "Sorry about the mess in here. That's gonna be one hell of a cleanup bill."
  
  "It ain't on my dime." Johnny snorted. "The FBI's frontin' the whole bill."
  
  "Well, that's helpful."
  
  "Sometimes, yeah."