text: Ronnea Stiles Broken BY: RONNEA STILES To my twin Danea 
   
   
   CHAPTER ONE 
     
   ~Queen~ 
     
   His left hand felt so large and cold as it swiftly came across my face resulting in the left side of my face hurting agonizingly. I collapsed to the floor falling out of the chair I landed hard on the hardwood floor. My hair went from bouncy curls to sweaty strands hanging from my head. I scooted back at the sound of his huge size 13 feet stomping and vibrating the ground closer and closer as he progressed towards me. He boisterously yelled, cursed, and screamed at me and swore he'd kill me and I without a doubt knew he would with no hesitation. I kept quickly scooting back more and more until there was no where else to scoot except the wooden door, I hit the back of my head on the door knob making another place that hurts. I squinted to see him still coming towards me loudly yelling , "Yell at me again you little bitch!" Automatically on instinct I responded  
   "Daddy I'm sorry!"  He grabbed me by my hair and dragged me to his room. I kicked and squirmed but his hands were so powerful. "Sorry". I yelled back and forth. He didn't seem to listen or care. He picked me up and threw me on his bed. His dark face and cold pretentious eyes stared me down as he pinned me to his bed. He lifted up my long sway blue dress. I screamed. "Shutup you little bitch!" He smacked me hard in my face as tears rolled down my eyes. Not again I thought. As the feeling of salty tears rolled down my eyes and the feeling of his cold hands on my heated body slowly and aggressively pulling my panties down I repeatedly thought "I need to get out of here". But how? He finished pulling my panties down and started working on pulling his pants down. I could feel his hot and low breath as he was breathing rapidly. I knew he enjoyed doing this from the satisfied look on his face. "Relax baby girl". He whispered in my ear. He start to put his hands down my thigh, every finger of his felt like fire on my skin it burned my insides. I looked around his dark cold room sweat dripped down my forehead. I then spotted a lamp on his dresser as he kissed on my neck. I traced my fingers along the black cord. His breaths were getting louder now as he shoved himself inside of me. I screamed loud in pain before I knew it I picked up the lamp and hit it across his head hard. He screamed in an uproar stumbling back in pain from being hit with the lamp and he fell, in a panic I hurried pulled my panties up and ran out of the house as fast as I could. I ran fast as rain pondered on my skin. I didn't know where to go. I looked to my left I looked to my right but nothing, not a thing was insight. That's when I heard him calling me. "Queen baby girl...Getcho ass back here!" I didn't look back instead I ran faster, that's when I ran across a big church. The rain soaked my body I didn't know where to go. So I walked back to the church I passed. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWO 
    ~James~ 
     
   The church sang and praised loud the whole town could hear us. I bobbed my head, stomped my feet and clapped my hands on beat to the wonderful sound of the music. The church today was crowded my old man was the bishop and I was his son. James Junior that's right that's what they called me. I kept looking around when I spotted Sylvia that girl was a doll she had big brown eyes long and pretty brown hair with smooth caramel skin. She was one of the praise dancers and the good lord knows I'm sorry but I couldn't help myself from staring at her slim body. I suddenly shook out of my dazed thoughts and remembered where I was . "Lord forgive me". I thought, I knew I shouldn't have been thinking those foul and horrendous thoughts while in the house of God but the thought of her body up against mine was vivid in the back of my mind when starring at her. Suddenly that's when the music stopped and everybody sat down "Finally". I thought, "I have time to collect myself". As we sat down my father "Bishop Jones" spoke up by the podium.  "Let the church say amen" "Amen". Said the church. My father was a cocky built man and my mother sat on the right side of him she was First Lady Mrs. Bishop Jones. My mother looked aimlessly and proud at my father. Everyone looked up to him and so did I. One day I hope to become as great of a bishop as my father is. Nothing more good then praising The Lord as much as I can and knowing when you die you'll get into heavens gates knowing you lived righteously that's all I wanted.  "Today we need to praise The Lord... Because I've got a testimony. My son James Jones was accepted to attend.... wait let me rephrase that he got a full ride scholarship to play football at Mizzou !"  The church people cheered loudly in triumph for me and to tell you the truth I was proud myself.  "C'mon up here son". I confidently stood up as everyone watched and clapped their hands I walked slowly to the podium getting a feeling of exasperation from all the welcomes and praises. I smiled at everyone as they looked at me. "Geez... I wasn't expecting my father to put me on the spot so soon". Everyone laughed. "But I will say it was in Gods strength and will to give me the blessing of receiving this scholarship and without God in my life I wouldn't be saying this right now..." Before I could even finish a filthy girl walked into the church everyone gasped and looked at her. She was soaked and her face was beat up her hair was all tangled and rough looking. She looked at everyone then ran out. I don't know what or why but a weird feeling inside of me made me follow her. I chased her outside. Yelling  "Wait!" The girl turned around. I walked up to her to notice behind all that filth she was extremely beautiful. "What?" "What made you leave?" "Everyone was staring at me...what do you want?" "I want to help you". "Do I look like I need help?"  She asked aggravatingly. "Yes you do". I chuckled. She rolled her eyes and turned to walk away until I grabbed her arm. "What?!" "I want to help you". "Leave me alone I don't need your charity!" She then stomped away. I stood there watching her vanish into the night while I got soaked with Gods tears. I didn't know what it was but I was in love. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER THREE 
    ~Queen~ 
     
   It's been two weeks since I've last seen my dad and to be completely honest I miss him I know that's really odd and strange to say but I do, I mean hey at least I got a good meal when I was with him. I was sitting down in this local run down diner waiting for someone to notice me and how I looked and would feel some type of sympathy for me to offer and buy me something to eat. I haven't had a bath and I've got on the same clothes from the night I left my dads house which was two weeks ago. The only thing that was actually clean on me was my teeth and that's only because I stole toothpaste and a toothbrush from a local store the manager saw me and kicked me out but I still kept the things I took. Right now I honestly don't know what to do the only thought that keeps coming into the back of my mind is that boy who I met at the church the chubby light skinned boy. Maybe I could go there and get some help. I know I acted like a bitch and everything but I was angry and acted on impulse knowing I needed the help. Maybe someone like him one of "Gods people" could help me out. That would be a long walk from where I am now but there's a good chance they'll help me out give me somewhere to stay so I need to go back to the church.  ~ Today no one seemed to be at the church the only car I saw outside in the parking lot was a truck that was silver. I started to feel stupid thinking "Maybe I should just go back home." But my old man hasn't found me all this time so I should just keep moving, but where? That's when that boy walked out of the church he looked as though he was closing up. He turned around to see me he jumped a bit as if he were startled but then a slight smile appeared on his face. I tightened my grip up in my face trying to hold a regular but discerning look as he walked over to me. It was daylight and the sun shined down on my dark skin.  "You came back I see ". "I'd like to take you up on your offer could .....you help me?" He looked at me weird I couldn't comprehend what he was thinking. "If I recall correctly you said you didn't need help".  He smirked. I wasn't in the mood so I just rolled my eyes and turned to walk away but before I did he grabbed my wrist. "Wait.... Please I was just joking...I can help you out I'm on my way home right now actually I'm sure my parents will help you there". "I don't know..." "Trust me please there's more creeps sitting around here just waiting to try and get you into their cars but I'm not that person okay. If you honestly want my help then get in, if you don't and want to be obstinate go back to where you came from or stay stranded waiting for one of them to catch you".  He then turned and walked away from me looking serious but sweet I looked around to see who would actually be watching I saw no one, I shrugged my shoulders and yelled "Wait!" I did want his help and so I ran over to his car. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER FOUR 
     
   ~James~ 
     
   I was surprised and somewhat happy to see her again but I had to act natural as the beautiful dark brown skin girl got into my car. I didn't want to seem like a creep but I couldn't keep my eyes off her even after masking the scent of her distasteful smell she was still like art what more could I do aside from stare. I could tell she really needed my help so I prayed to God begging she would stick around. "Are you hungry?" I asked. "Very" "When's the last time you ate?" She lifted up her dress a bit and fixed her hair even though it was all nappy.  "About a week ago". I was astonished did this girl really say a week ago? I just couldn't imagine all the stuff she's been through. I knew she had a story and I wanted to hear it. "What do you have a taste for?" I asked trying to sound calm. "Anything...I just really need a bath". I glanced over at her body trying to get a good look at her and the damage she's taken, but I couldn't really tell what it looked like because her dress was so bulky but she was right she wreaked of outside and dirt I seriously needed to get her to my parents soon.  "I'll tell you what, once we get to my house my parents will take care of you". She didn't say anything but just nodded her head, I rolled the windows down to let some of the bad smell out without trying to seem rude.  ~ We finally pulled up to my house I watched as her eyes got big and her mouth dropped I could instantly tell what she was thinking. She thought my house was huge and I won't even try to stunt like its not, it was big.  "You can get out".  I said to her. She paused for a second and looked at me but didn't move. "I'm sorry. This was a bad mistake". "Wait why?" "I can't go in there smelling like this...especially not looking like this either!" She yelled. She hastily looked in the mirror and attempted to fix her face up in some type of way. I took her hand away from her face grabbed her other one and held them down and made her look at me. All I saw was a girl in need, the longer I stared at her the more I felt the need to help her. She was different from other girls I've met and seen she had this look ... This really desperate look in her eyes and all I wanted to do was help her.  "Look you gotta trust and believe me my family won't care how your looking right now at all. They'll only be concerned with one thing and that's helping you.... In all honesty you look fine to me".  I said with confidence. She sighed and said "Okay let's do it." I got out and came around to open the passenger side door for her, I smiled while watching her get out of the car. We walked to the front door she stood behind me as I opened the door. I turned around to her and said "Don't be afraid". With a smile on my face to help her feel comfortable. That's when my mom came to the door. Her eyes wandered to the girl as we came in she gasped a little in astonishment to how she looked but she quickly fixed her face and then her eyes wandered to me. My mom was a heavy set woman with nice curly hair and light skin just like me and my father. She was very sweet but getting on her bad side is something you don't want to do... At all. "Ummm Baby...who's this?" I didn't even know how to answer that question because I hadn't even learned her name yet.  "Umm...mom this is the girl from about two weeks ago who ran into the church. She needs help". "You don't say...Okay well... has she tried getting connected with her family?" Suddenly that's when the girl stood in front of me and started to speak. "Excuse me ma'am but I'm sorry to come up on you so suddenly. Your son said you could help me. And to answer your question I don't have any family". My mom looked at the girl long and hard. "C'mon in I think I can find you something to wear".  I smiled brightly. I knew my mom would give in. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER FIVE 
     
   ~Queen~ 
     
   The lady walked me around their huge house it was so luxurious, I thought the outside was amazing until I got to look around the inside of it. Their house was the type of house you would see in movies with the perfect rich family who had everything or one you would see in commercials. They must have money I thought they have to, but I just had a real uneasy feeling about all of this for some reason I felt as if I wanted to run out and go back home to my father. I really miss him a lot. I knew deep down inside though that these people where the only good I had left if I wanted to get help.  "My daughter will let you borrow some of her clothes. How old are you again sweetie?" "I'm 16 ma'am ". "Great well my daughter isn't here right now but she's not too much older then you... Hmm you guys look as if you're bout the same shape and size". She said while glancing over at my body. She walked into a huge room and I could tell it was her daughters, she looked through a couple drawers but had finally found some pants and a shirt. "I think these will do for now". She handed me her daughters clothes and walked me to a bathroom. Even the bathroom was huge I just couldn't believe I was in a house like this. "There's towels, soap, and shampoo in the closet... Once you're done getting cleaned off come down for dinner there's a ham in the oven just as we speak". She said while smiling. I smiled at her as she walked out of the bathroom. I couldn't figure it out but I wondered why she was so friendly, I guess I'll save that thought for later I start to take off my dress which I was so happy to do since I'd been wearing it for two weeks straight now. I looked at my body in the body mirror. I had a nice thick body for my age but the only thing was the scars left over from my dad's beatings at home, they stick there on my skin like tattoos. I then looked up at my face, it was smooth and chocolate I had short curly dangling hair that laid down to my shoulders. My old man always said no man would ever find me beautiful and I'd believe him but sometimes just sometimes I think he's wrong. I hastily looked away ashamed of my body and face. I grabbed the towel, shampoo and soap from the closet and started to run the shower water. As I got into the shower the hot water stung to my skin but it felt so good, finally I was starting to feel clean again . 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER SIX 
    ~James~ 
     
   My dad had just gotten home and my mom and I were all in the family room discussing about this mysterious girl.  "She can't stay here". Said my dad. I started to get a little angry. "Why not? I told her we would help her". "Son we can find other ways to help her but her living with us isn't one we know nothing about this girl and I'm not putting my family in danger". "Dad you can tell she's just a kid! We're supposed to be Gods people but we can't even help her!" My mom got into my face. "You better watch yoself now...your father is right we know nothing of this girl I'm sure there's other ways". "Like what?!" "We can give her enough money for her to spend a coupla nights at a hotel until she can get ahold of her family". "Dad she said it herself she has no family". "Son she's 16 years old she had to come from somewhere". "James hunny let your father and I discuss about this matter and maybe God will give us some strength, but right now you should go check on her. I told her to come down for dinner she should be ready now". I rolled my eyes now irritated at my parents but I listened and left the family room. I walked up the steps and went to the guest bathroom where she was. I opened he door and immediately she jumped, I startled, forgetting to knock before I came in I saw her with a white towel wrapped around her body. My eyes got big I was embarrassed now so I hurried and closed the door. As I was walking away the door opened up. "You can come in if you want". She said with a smirk on her face. My body most certainly wanted to walk into the bathroom with her but I knew it wasn't right. "No it's fine I'll wait out here...sorry for busting in on you like that I should have knocked". "It's ok...I'm putting clothes on now...thankyou". "No problem... I'm James by the way". "I'm Queen". What a beautiful name I thought. We both stared at each other for about a minute until I shook out of my daze. "Well....I'll be downstairs dinner is ready". I then hurried down the steps. For some odd reason this girl has all of my attention.  ~ We were in the middle of praying, me, my mom, dad and my sister when Queen came into the eating room. Everyone stared at her. She looked twice as gorgeous now that she was all cleaned up.  "Grab a plate and join us". My mother said. I watched her in astonishment as she piled greens, dressing, salad, ham, potatoes, and Mac and cheese all onto her plate. She then sat down and started gobbling her food down. Everyone was looking at her crazy, her head hadn't even lifted for just a second but I think she felt us staring because she suddenly stopped and looked up with food stuffed in her mouth. I chuckled a bit. "There's always seconds". My sister said. I never understood my sister she always had a snobby attitude. She was a 20 year old brat. She had short sandy brown hair was thick in size and was lighter then everyone in the family.  "It's fine I'm full". I could see in Queens face that she was lying, but even I wouldn't want to eat either if I had a girl staring me down as I ate.  "My clothes look like they fit wonderful on you...you can keep them". I was surprised at how nice my sister was acting I was afraid she'd be more sarcastic. Queen looked at what she was wearing then looked up at my sister and smiled. "So umm what's your name?" My father asked. "Queen... My name is Queen". "Queen where is your family?" "I...my mother died when I was 10 and my father..." She started to move around aimlessly in her chair. I could tell she was starting to feel uncomfortable.  "I'm sorry to hear that...come again though what did you say about your father, I didn't quite understand you?" She looked somberly at my father. "I should go". She got up, everyone watched her as she did. Why was she leaving? "Wait Queen you don't have to leave dear...we can give you some money so you can sleep at a hotel". "This was really nice ma'am but I'll just leave". My mother rolled her eyes as Queen left the table and pointed them towards my father. "What? I asked her two questions". "Bishop Jones where is your God at...you see this poor young girl has no where to stay". My mom got up and followed Queen. Me, my dad, and sister all looked at each other until I got up and started to follow mom.  ~ When I had gotten to the door Queen and my mom where just sitting down on the front steps talking. I didn't want to intrude so I just listened in on their conversation. "Hunny you can stay here for as long as you want okay....we also have a church you can come to too". "I ain't real godly ma'am ". "Oh dear! Its okay I wasn't so godly at first either until I met my wonderful husband Bishop Jones 45 years ago...I'm sure you'll find all the help you need there". "Thank you..." "I tell you what...I'm going to give you 200 dollars and you can do whatever you need to do with it just please be safe and careful and come to church". "Ma'am I can't take your money...you've already done enough by feeding me letting me use the shower and clothing me...really I just can't." I watched as my mom giggled and wrapped her arms around Queen. "Child please take the money I can tell you need it more than I do..." That's when they both turned around to see me. I stepped back a little when Queen and my mother got up. "Well James baby since you're here you can take Queen up to a hotel". "Yea sure...are you ready now?" Queen nodded her head. My mom winked at me as we walked to my truck. I was jovial to see my family helping Queen out. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER SEVEN 
     
   ~Queen~ 
     
   It was almost midnight now and the boy James was driving me to a hotel. I never believed in God but these people where big on him. Bibles and bible scriptures wandered all throughout their house, they prayed at dinner, and even Mrs. Jones prayed to me about him I could tell they were the real deal. I don't know maybe there is a God, I still couldn't fathom that she really gave me 200 dollars. They wanted me to come back to their church but I knew I wouldn't I think she knew it too just deep down. I was going to take the money and try to find a job and buy more clothes. I don't have time for church or for whoever this "God" was. James interrupted my thoughts. "We're almost there". "It's fine take your time...I've always loved long drives". He turned and smiled at me then turned his eyes back to the road. "Thankyou for helping me out...I've never met people so friendly before". "Don't thank us...thank God he's the one who's blessed us to help you and other people". "Where does this God live?" James laughed but I didn't understand why.  "Oh wait...you're serious aren't you?" I gave him a dumbfounded look. "Umm God is the creator of this world called heaven...that's where he lives". "Have you ever visited him before? Can he help me?" James pulled into a hotel called ROADSIDE INTERNATIONAL hotel. He parked in the parking lot, turned off his car and stared at me.  "I've never visited God before and don't plan on it for awhile...but yes he is able to help you...but if you truly want him in your life you should come to the church get saved and good things will come your way". "How do I get him to talk to me?" "Let's see...well you can pray...that's the only way". "I don't know how to pray". "Well okay umm.... how about tomorrow I come pick you up bright and early in the morning and I can take you to church so you can get a feel of God". "I can't go". "What why not, thought you wanted to get close to God?" "I don't have any church clothes...and I need to start finding a job". "I can help you with that just please come to church with me that's all I ask." I couldn't say no to this boy I mean he's helped me all this time and I needed him to help me meet God. "What time do I need to be up?" "Sunday morning worship starts at 10:30 so I'll be here at 7 to bring you clothes to get dressed". He smiled brightly at me. James had curly brown hair and smooth light skin, he was a lil bit on the chubby side and I noticed he had this scar on the back of his head.  "I'll be up then". "Ok, now let's get you checked in". "Wait...you're not staying?" He looked at me with shock. "Oh...umm that wasn't part of the plan...and I doubt my parents will let me". "Why?" He tapped on the steering wheel. "I'm an 18 year old boy with a beautiful young girl staying at a hotel now that doesn't sound very godly at all does it". I couldn't help but smile. Nobody has ever called me beautiful but curiously I wondered if he was just saying that. "Do you really think I'm beautiful?" "Yes...very". That's when I leaned over and kissed him on his cheek. His cheeks turned red and he turned away all embarrassed it was kinda cute . "Thank you so much James...I'll be up in the morning...but I can check myself in". I got out and started to walk into the hotel. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER EIGHT 
     
   ~James~ 
     
   I watched as she walked into the hotel. I couldn't believe she didn't know how to pray or who God was, why was this girl so mysterious. I can still feel her kiss stained to my cheek it was soft and smooth. For some reason I couldn't stop thinking about this girl. God why did you bring this girl into my life? I knew God wouldn't tell me the answer I would have to figure out myself. I started to head back home, I couldn't wait until tomorrow ~ I knocked on her room number door. A minute later she opened it. All she had on was her bra and panties. I started to get hot so I quickly turned away. "It's ok...you can look at me". "No Queen that's not right..I can't...please put some clothes on". I heard her make a sound and suddenly that's when she pulled me inside and closed the door. I handed her a long black dress that my sister had along with some red flats. She looked at the dress then sat it on the bed. "I can't go to church". I stood up and turned the other way. "Why?'' "I don't wear this...it's very nice and all but it's not me". "You don't have any other clothes though". "Listen you guys are really nice for taking me in like this and I appreciate it but I have to go". I turned to face her. I couldn't stop staring at her pink bra and panties, she had scars on her stomach. She noticed me looking and covered herself with her cover. "I'm sorry". "It's fine...please I'll come to church some other time...you have my word". "Sure...you're always welcomed". I turned and started to leave when she grabbed me.  "You can stay longer if you want". "Do you want me to?" She shook her head. She sat down on her bed and patted her hand on the bed indicating that she wanted me to sit down. I sat down only inches apart from her. I started to get a little uncomfortable this girl was so beautiful I didn't want to say anything wrong or dumb. "Tell me about yourself". "Eh...well let's see...I'm the bishops son as you've probably noticed...I work lots in the church..." She stopped me from talking by grabbing unto my hand. "No I mean tell me about you...not what you tell everyone else". No one has ever wanted to know me really so I didn't quite know how to answer Queens question. "I'm just a church boy". She giggled and started to fix my tie. She stared me in my eyes for awhile before she leaned over and kissed me on my lips. Her lips were nice and smooth but I didn't know if I should kiss her back. She put my hands around her waist and got on top of me. "Queen.." "It's ok". She started to kiss me more aggressively now and I couldn't help my body it was like instinct I just grabbed unto her and started to kiss her back. We did that for awhile until she grabbed at my pants and started rubbing on my almost hard dick. I knew this wasn't right and I barely know this girl so I had to put an end to it.  "Stop please!"  I pushed her off me lightly and she laid back on the bed as I began to stand up. "What what's wrong?" "Queen you don't know me". "So you don't want to?" "Believe me I really do it's just it's not right". "I thought you would want it in return from all the stuff you've done for me". "Queen you don't owe me anything I just honestly wanted to help you...you shouldn't feel like you have to pay me in sex...you're really worth more than that". She stared at me for a small second then got up and rubbed her hands through her head. "I'll see you around". She walked into the bathroom and closed the door. I now felt as if I was the bad guy, but I didn't want her to feel like that's what I wanted because those weren't my intentions at all. So without hesitation I left the room. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER NINE 
    ~Queen~ 
     
   I sat there on my bed feeling real dumb. I just couldn't believe James had left me there without wanting to touch me. I didn't know what his problem was but I didn't like it. I walked back into the bathroom and started to run my fingers along the roots of my hair. I had dark hair with loose z like curls. I needed to find a job today and I also wanted to stop by home to pick up some clothes. So I started to get dress and put on the clothes James sister let me have.  ~ I wandered around the streets as people looked at me. I kept walking down the dusty dirt road until I approached my beat down one story house. It had holes on the outside of the house and the grass was a yellowish green. There were no leaves on any of the four old trees outside my house. I was hesitant to walk in. I didn't want to encounter another beating from my father but I had to get some clothes. Before I walked in I took a long deep breath and put the 200 dollars in my bra. I then start to walk slowly to the front door. As I walked I wondered did my old man miss me or even think to himself that I maybe hurt? I sighed and opened the screen door the front door was unlocked. As I walked in the wooden floor made a screeching sound. "Dad it's me...Queen" But I didn't get a response. So I started for my room. I walked into my small green room which was my favorite place to be. After all those beatings I'd go right into my room and sit on my small twin sized bed and think what I did to make him so angry at me. I didn't have time for that now though I had to hurry and get my bag and clothes before my father came. I opened up my drawers and stuffed as many clothes and shoes in my blue duffle bag as possible, I hurried and ransacked everything until I found everything I needed. That's when all of a sudden I heard his voice. My heart start to race to the sound of his voice sounding like horses on a track it was beating so loud I thought it would beat out of my chest. I had to think and act fast so I grabbed my pocket knife that was hidden under my pillow I kept with me ever since my mama died. I started to slowly proceed toward the hall with the knife in my right hand behind my back. "Queen?" My dad had found me. He was 6'9 and weighed almost 300 pounds. He wasn't fat though my dad was very muscular. He was dark chocolate with rough curly hair.  "Daddy". "Where you been? I been looking all over for you". "I found a new place to stay". I lied but I knew I couldn't stay here. I could tell my dad was sober because he wasn't angry in fact he looked very sad at me. He usually beats me only when he's been drinking. "Where at?" "A better place...I just can't live here no more daddy". "Why baby girl?" I didn't know what to say. He walked over to me and pulled me into his embrace. I slowly put the knife into my duffel bag. He kissed me on my forehead and held me tight. I remember when there use to be times I loved my dad's big bear hugs but now I hate them.  "I don't want you to leave baby girl."  "I know daddy but I got to go". He let me go and solemnly looked at me. "Did I hurt you again?" I hate that my dad could just forget what he's done to me so fast. His beatings were like scars they were on my body and in my head I couldn't forget a thing.  "No daddy...I just have to go". My dad shook his head like he understood. He walked over to me once again and gently kissed me on my lips. I moved my face away in shame then walked out the house. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TEN 
    ~James~ 
     
   Church had finally ended and everyone started to fellowship. I walked around trying to find my parents, in reality I really wanted to see Queen here, I wanted her to know I was sorry. As I walked I accidentally bumped into Sylvia. Her bible had fallen down, she bent over to pick it up I couldn't help but stare at her ass. It looked nice and round in that tight fitted knit skirt she had on. She got up and smiled at me. Sylvia had a beautiful smile, overall she was just a beautiful girl. "I'm sorry bout your bible". "Don't apologize to me...apologize to him". She pointed her index finger towards the ceiling. We both chuckled. "I will most certainly make note of that". "Good...today's lesson about keeping hope in God was wonderful...I wish my father was as good as yours". "Well...I'm sure he is". She gave me a slant smile then fixed her long hair. "We should maybe go out sometime". I gave her a weird look. "To discuss about the upcoming play of course, duhh!" "Ohhhh yea! You're right...the play". She giggled at me a little. That's when her parents called for her to leave. "Well I bests get going now...so I'll call you later tonight". "Great and I'll answer". I smiled brightly at her as I watched her walk over to her parents.  ~ We closed up church, now only my father, mother, sister, and me all sat down in the church. My sister Caroline started to speak. "I knew that girl wasn't gonna show up...she was probably just some sneaky girl who was good for getting money out of people". "Caroline Shutup! You don't know anything". Everyone stared back at me with a stunned look on their faces. "Oh well excuse me I'm sorry James for talking about yo lil thieving girlfriend". She snickered. I rolled my eyes now angry. "Well I just hope the girl enjoys that 200 dollars I gave her". My father kept quiet and I wondered why. "She promised me she will come to church...mom this girl really needs help". "Hunny I can't give her help if she doesn't want it". "Why are you so interested with that girl?" I looked over at Caroline.  "I'm just trying to do Gods will and get her closer to him". That's when my father then interrupted me. "That's good son I love hearing that from you but it's like your mother said if she doesn't want to receive help then we can't give it to her...all you need to worry about is playing football and staying close to God yourself." "Dad it's the summer I don't need to trip off football". "How do you expect to be the best if you don't practice?" I hated when my father spoke about football like that, always wanting me to be the best and for me to be perfect. If I ever looked average on the field or wanted to look average he gets mad. I couldn't deal with my father, I'm tired of him telling me what to do, I didn't even like football but I played it so much I just became great at it. Now my father wants me to become an NFL player, something I think he wanted to do but couldn't. Only thing is that path just wasn't for me, my dad was a good man but that was only when it came to The Lord he honored and praised but he never came to realize how much he thought anything I did wasn't right, and today I just didn't have time to hear him criticize me about my actions. I got up and started putting my jacket on. "Where do you think you're going?" "I'm leaving dad...I don't have time for this". Before he could even put the words to say "Get back here" together I had already walked off. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER ELEVEN 
    ~Queen~ 
     
   My summer wasn't going as planned but then again nothing ever did. It was about midnight now and I still wandered the streets with only 50 dollars left in my pocket. I still needed to buy more clothes and shoes on top of that for the last two weeks I've had to find new places to live, but now I couldn't afford to go to another hotel I seriously needed to save my money. It was pitch dark and I was walking with one huge suitcase in my right hand. I placed my left hand in my pocket, and let the cool summer breeze flow enjoying the wind I spotted a small ranch style diner called BURGER&FRIES DINER. I needed to find a job immediately so I walked in. Instantly as I walked in people looked in my direction and started to stare at me. It only held a few tables and mostly white people where around. I watched people indulge in their burgers and chew their fries like it was freshly made delicious gourmet food. That's when a blonde haired man walked up to me. "You looking for something girl?" "Yea is this place hiring?" He looked around the diner and then said "This ol' beat up joint" then looked back at me and chuckled. "We ain't looking for no help girl... So you might as well run along somewhere else". He then spit next to my foot. I jumped back before it touched me and started to walk away. As I walked away some man from the bar cocked his head towards me. "You looking for work girl...I can find you some place to work". I turned sideways to get a better look at him. He was tall, caramel skinned, and astonishingly very handsome. I needed a job so I walked over to him. "Go ahead and sit on down". I sat down on a stool right next to him.  "Go on and sit ya stuff down too get comfortable". "Now why would I do that...you trynna rob me?" He chuckled a bit and so did I. That's when he asked one of the waitresses to come over. "Yes Mr. King". I thought to myself he had to be well known around here for the waitress to know his name. "I will have my regular...also get this beautiful lady one as well". "Well how old is she?" They both looked at me. I fixed my hair and dress. "18...I'm 18". "You got an I.d.?" "I lost it". Mr. King and the waitress looked at  me. "Well I'm sorry but I can't serve you without an I.d." "Hold on... Sheryl listen now you know me I'm a well respected man around town and I would never give alcohol to a minor if she wasn't of age I wouldn't have made the request now would I?" "Yes Mr. King but..." He cut her off. "Sheryl Just get the drinks". She looked frightened, then she walked away.  "Well you sure must be well known". "I own a few clubs". He looked me up and down from my head to my toes. "Oh really what kinda club?" "I would love for you to work for me...I can get you anything you need". "I need a place to stay". "That's not a problem". He smiled at me, I smiled back. I honestly didn't know if I should trust or listen to this man but I needed help finding a job and a place to stay so any help right now was the best. The waitress brought two shots out Mr. King and I chugged them down. It was so strong I choked a little I even thought I was going to vomit for a minute. He laughed at my facial expression. "Damn what is this shit?" "Hennessy...now let's get out of here". "Where are we going?" "My place...It ain't like I'm gonna hurt you I don't bite."  He smiled then picked up my suitcase. I knew it was really risky and iffy for me to follow him but looking at my current situation I did anyway. We walked outside to a brand new black Pontiac he opened up my door and I got in.  ~ As he drove he asked me questions. "What's yo name?" "Queen". "That's a beautiful name...you can call me Cam". "Cam why you being so nice to me?" "You needed help so I want to help you". "What do I have to do?" He looked over at me but didn't answer my question he just stopped the car at a nice ranch style house.  "C'mon in". He got out and so did I, grabbing my suitcase I followed him into the house it was very beautiful on the inside. Very neat and nicely kept up as if he had a maid. I walked around as he followed behind. "Cam you never did answer my question". I turned around and he looked at me. "God you're beautiful...how old are you really?" "16". He stared at me for a second then walked into this huge bedroom I followed him in. He sat down on his bed as I stood up in front of him. "About that job...You can work for me at this club I own as a dancer". I chuckled.  "What kind of dancer?" "C'mon on over here girl and I'll show you". I was a little hesitant because he reached out and started grabbing me by my hips but I needed this moneyso I gave in a little. He laid me on his bed and began to kiss me.  
   "Cam I don't want..." "Shh". He started kissing me again then he looked at me closely.  "You want this job don't you?" "Yes I do...but I thought I was going to dance". Cam got up and walked around his room.  "Where's your family at girl?!" "I don't have nun". I sat up in his bed. "Leave". "What why I need the job?!!" "You can't do nothing for me". I stood up then headed towards the door. He watched me as I stopped. I had no place to go or stay and right now this random man was my only hope. So I turned myself around walked over to Cam and started kissing him. I put my hands down his pants slowly rubbing his dick as he started getting hard. "Damn girl you sure want this job don't you?" I nodded my head as he gently laid me back on his bed.  ~ I woke up with my hair everywhere and Cam standing over me.  "You been sleep for years girl...don't you get rest?" I chuckled as he sat down and gently rubbed his hands through my head.  "What time is it?" "6...pm". I got up out of shock from what time he said . "Relax girl you don't start working until tonight...I promise I'll help you get whatever you need and that's what I'm going to do". "Do you do this to all the girls that dance for you?" He chuckled and looked me in my eyes. Cams skin was like milk chocolate and his eyes where hazel as ever. I couldn't believe I had slept with this man I just met. "Only if their as beautiful as you...and no your the first". I smiled even though I knew he was lying. "Cam I've never danced before". "That's alright...men like newbies". He got up and walked out. I followed him to the kitchen as he was fixing some strawberries. I then spotted some bacon on a plate as I went to grab it Cam pushed me really hard. I fell to the ground with a loud thud.  "That's not for you!" I got up dusting myself off. "I'm sorry". "You get fruit you have to keep your body nice...and what's all those scars I saw on your stomach huh?!" I stepped back as he charged for me. He grabbed my arm really hard. "They've always been there... "It's disgusting you have to take care of yourself...I know a plastic surgeon who can fix that...please go and clean yourself up". I backed up slowly then walked upstairs. For some reason I was beginning to regret what I had done.  ~ It was around midnight and I stood in a dressing room full of strippers. Cam had a thing for young girls, they all laughed and walked around half naked while I stood by the mirror looking at my body in this all lace bathing suit. It was a one piece and it showed off all my ass. To tell you the truth I was extremely nervous. I didn't know what to do at all. That's when suddenly Cam barged in yelling for girls to hit the floor and go make him some money. He spotted me and walked over to my direction. "You look beautiful". "Cam you've done so much for me...but I can't do this...this is not me I'm not feeling it". His face scrunched up and he looked at me. He put both his hands on my arms. "Baby you look beautiful...all you're doing is dancing to get you some money...I said I would help you". "I know but...". He stopped me by kissing my lips he then grabbed something out of his pocket and told me to close my eyes and open my mouth. I did as he told, he placed something on my tongue and told me to close my mouth. "Now let it dissolve baby girl and in a few minutes you won't worry about anything". I shook my head then walked upstairs.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWELVE 
    ~James~ 
     
   "Jesus is Lord". Sylvia repeated. She smiled at me brightly as her hands were holding her script. It was just her and I practicing for our upcoming play in July. I felt exhausted and had enough of practicing so I sat down in one of the front rows of the church. Sylvia came over and sat down next to me, her long hair was pinned up in an up do and she had two long beautiful curls hanging down in front of her face. She had a real nice classy pink dress on she just looked all around gorgeous today.  "I can't help but say...I've noticed you've kept your eyes on me all night". Shit really, I thought, was I that noticeable. I chuckled. "Well.. I'm sorry it's just that I can't help but notice a beautiful girl."  Her eyes twinkled a bit then she smiled. "You really are very charming...it's so funny because my mom was literally just talking about you". "Really what did she say?" Sylvia crossed her legs, and looked at me closely smiling. "Well she said it'll be real nice if you and I got together, like really isn't that just funny?!" We both laughed a little . "That is funny but you know what honestly I'd be hono..." Before I could even complete my sentence Queen out of no where walked into the church she looked just the same as she did on the first day I saw her but the only difference was this time she had on some very short shorts and a bra. I stood up quick, and Sylvia did as well. "Wait...what were you gonna say?" I out of no where instinctively just pushed Sylvia out of my way. I saw her face flush red. I ran over to Queen and grabbed her, holding her close to me as if she were a child that got hurt on the playground. "What's happened to you?!" Queen looked up at me with blood slowly dripping from her lip she was shivering. I immediately took off my jacket and gave it to her, I helped her sit down. Sylvia walked over to us, her hands were crossed over her chest. "James honestly you can't keep picking up the pieces for this girl...all the church people are talking!!" "Sylvia please I don't want to hear this now just run and go get some tissue from the bathroom become useful!" She huffed and puffed loudly while she marched off to the back, which I hope she was going to the bathroom. I sat down next to Queen as she started to talk. "I'm sorry to barge in on you again like this...but you were the only person I thought of...and I saw the church lights on so I automatically figured you were inside". "Oh baby please don't be sorry you did the right thing...I'm gonna help you". She looked up at me and tried to smile but I could tell her mouth was hurting. "Queen who did this to you?!" "A guy I met...you don't know him". How could anybody do this I thought.  "Where in the living hell is this guy ,huh where is he?!" "Settle down... I'm fine I have you now". She laid her head on my shoulder. I grabbed her and put my arms around her as Sylvia came back. Her mouth dropped when she saw us. She threw me the tissues. "I better get going now it's real late". She then stomped off, her heels click clacking on the hardwood floor as she walked away.  "What's her problem?" Queen asked. "I...I don't know...let's get you to my house ok?" Queen shook her head and we both got out. For some reason I really liked this girl and I wanted to be that hero she never had.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER THIRTEEN 
    ~Queen~ 
     
   I really liked James a lot even though we haven't spoken since the day he rejected me. It was something different about this boy it was kinda odd that he didn't want sex from me so I was starting to believe that he just honestly wanted me for me. I knew he was the only person I could count on helping me. Cam saw me eating a burger earlier today and he beat the shit out of me, it's just hard trying to eat healthy when I haven't eaten a good solid meal since I left James' house. Cam was right though he did promise me money, at first getting money from these men was hard but after all the drinks and Cams dissolvable candy he gave me every night got into my system I let loose and was able to make 500 dollars just in one day. Although I had to give Cam 300 of it, it was still more money that I'd ever gotten by myself. James had opened the passenger side door of his car for me and I got in, he soon walked around got in and started to drive. I began to wipe off my lip and fix up my hair. "Where are your clothes at?" "A safe place ....you can take me back to". James pulled the car over and looked over at me like I was insane. "Let me get this straight some guy just beat the shit out of you and you honestly just want to go back?" I didn't say anything he sighed and kept driving. "Queen I'm not mad at you I'm just trying to help you but you're making that real difficult...and what about church you haven't even showed up?" "I've been busy". "Yea I see that ...". "I'm sorry I've just been working...trying to make ends meet ya kno?" "No I don't know Queen I don't know your lifestyle...where's your family huh?" "My mom died remember I told you". "What about your dad you never mentioned him". "He's... dead as well". I lied to James but my dad was dead to me now, dead as he'll ever be. "Geez I'm sorry that's happened to you...losing both parents is immensely hard to deal with I can't imagine". "It's not that hard once you think about it". "What do you mean?" "Nothing...I'm just hungry". "Don't worry I'll get you some food". James then started driving again and pulled into a jack n the box and went in to get me some tacos. I sat there in the car still waiting on him. ~ "Shh". It was about midnight as me and James crept into his huge house trying not to make a sound. I was honestly surprised he was sneaking me in. He held my hand the whole way and I followed him through the the house as we walked up the steps to his room. As I walked into his room I noticed he was very organized and neat. Green and blue was everywhere and his room was like a little house. It had a bathroom in it, couches as if you were in the living room, and this big platinum screen tv. His room was seriously just amazing. I plopped down on his bed. He stood up and took his shirt off. He was a little chubby thang just like I liked.  "You trying to show me something?" He smirked. "Maybe". He then walked into the bathroom. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER FOURTEEN 
    ~James~ 
     
   I stood in the bathroom about to take my pants off when Queen just walked in. She had her shorts and bra on her curls fell all in her face she really looked adorable.  "Just a minute". "No need to stop because I'm here...continue". I looked at her as she smiled at me. "I need to take a shower though Queen". "So do I."  She smiled then began taking her shorts off she was just in some red lace panties. My body was already starting to get hot.  "Queen I don't think..." She walked over to me and started kissing me. I didn't know what to do so I kept my hands to my sides. "Touch me". She said. I looked her in her dark brown eyes and then wrapped my arms around her smooth small waist and started kissing her more. "Let's take a shower together". She whispered. I took a deep breath then shook my head. We both began to take our clothes off. I stared at every inch of Queens body, she was very slim and thick, immediately I was on hard she laughed a little then walked into the shower. I followed behind and started to let the hot water rinse our bodies. I pinned her up against the shower wall, her hands wrapped around my neck, good thing my shower was large. She then wrapped her legs around my waist and started to kiss me.  "Damn!"  I said repeatedly. She stopped to chuckle and kept kissing me. I really wanted to put my dick inside her but I knew this wasn't right and especially since I didn't have a condom with me. "Go ahead and put it in". She said. I stopped kissing her and looked up. "I gotta get the condom first it's in my room".  She looked at me.  "We don't need one". That's when she let go of me and knelt down in front of my dick. The hot water was soaking her body and hair up. I didn't know what to do so I laid back on the shower wall. She had grabbed my dick and start to suck it. This was the best feeling in my life I'd never gotten my dick sucked before but I didn't want to make it obvious but I also couldn't stop making slight grunts once she started moving up and down circling her tongue around my dick all the way to the top. I really wanted to fuck this girl right now. Queen was so damn beautiful and I wanted to be her man only thing is I didn't know if she wanted that back, but now wasn't the time to think about that so I stopped her and turned the shower off. "What's wrong baby?" "Let's finish in my room". She nodded her head, we left the bathroom I turned to face her then instantly she pushed me on the bed and leaped on top of me. This girl was driving me crazy. I grabbed unto her ass as she started to grind on me. "You like that baby?" She asked. All I could do was squint my eyes lick my lips and nod yes. She then grabbed my dick and was about to put it in her before I stopped her. "Wait...Ummm... I've never done this before". "You're a virgin?" I was so embarrassed but answered honestly.  "Yes". She just smiled then grabbed my dick and slowly put it inside her she began to move in an upward motion as a slight moan came from her mouth. She then started to grind and bounce on top of me, she felt so good on the inside, all I kept thinking about was all the blood rushing to my dick. "Queen..baby...I'm about to cum". She kept bouncing and grinding and going faster. That's when I hurried and pushed her off me then I started to cum everywhere. She sat up and started to laugh. I did too a little. I couldn't believe I just lost my virginity to Queen.  ~ I immediately changed the sheets and now we were just laying there. Queen turned over the opposite way as she slept I couldn't stop thinking bout this girl. I think I was in love in fact I knew I was in love from the moment I got a good look at this girl. I James Michael Jones was in love with Queen a girl I didn't even know the last name of. I chuckled then turned over wrapped my arm around her and went to sleep.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER FIFTEEN 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   It had to be about four in the morning when I woke up lying next to James. Shit I thought. I had to get out of here, theres no way this boy could like me I was no good and his life is already perfect. If he was to get involved with me I'd ruin everything for him. So I quietly got up found a shirt of his on the floor, some sweat pants in his closet and put them on. Then I grabbed my stuff and snuck out of his house. I knew I had to go and never come back.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER SIXTEEN 
   ~James~ 
     
   I opened my eyes already smiling hoping to turn over and see Queen but she wasn't there. Instantly my heart beat went down slower and slower. "Where the hell could she be?" I got up quick and rushed to put my clothes on, grabbed my keys off my night stand and ran down the steps straight for the door until my father stopped me. "Where are you going James?" "I...to the store". He gave me a skeptical look. "Alright son be back though before 6 Sylvia and her mother are coming over for dinner".  I instantly rolled my eyes. "Dad really?" "Son I think it'll be really nice if you and Sylvia got together". "Dad if I wanted her I could have her trust me I don't need help from you guys trying to play match maker." That's when I brushed passed him and walked out slamming the door behind me. I had to go find the girl I wanted and that was Queen.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER SEVENTEEN 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   "Baby I'm glad you came back...you know I love you...you make me the most money". Cam said while holding up my chin as if he were my father and I his crying daughter. I nodded my head and opened my mouth as routined. Cam placed the candy in his mouth then slowly kissed me putting his tongue around mines as it dissolved in my mouth. He stopped kissing me after the candy fully dissolved then smiled. "You're beautiful and I'm going to take care of you...just stop leaving ok?" "Yes Cam". I smiled brightly at him and turned to walk away he smacked my ass as I headed up the steps ready to dance. I slowly walked up the stairs my hands to my sides wearing pink laced panties. My curls bounced everywhere as I walked in high heels. The lights were dim and young girls half or fully naked danced all they could while men grabbed and touched them. As I was walking to find someone to dance on an old man grabbed my wrist. He held out a 100 dollar bill. I faked a smile and walked over to him. "Hey baby". He said with a slick but perverted smile and look on his face. I've noticed the more you talk to these men and make them feel loved for that moment the more money you get. I could feel the dissolved candy doing something because I started to feel calm as if I was floating on clouds or walking on water. My world stopped and it was just me dancing as if no one else was in the room. I slowly touched all over the man trying to be flirtatious then slowly turned around and bent over in front of him facing forward. I slowly grinded on his crotch then did a split right in front of him. He started to grab my ass really hard and to tell you the truth I didn't like the feeling but I thought "Do what you gotta do to get this money." I turned to face him dipped low to the floor then back up and started dancing. "Take them clothes off for me baby." He said. I shook my head no. "I gotta see more cash baby". He pulled me closer to him and started to feel on my boobs and butt. That's when he handed me another 100. I knew this man had money so I did exactly what he asked. I smiled then took off my panties and started to bounce my bare ass on him. He was beginning to get hard that's when Cam came over. "Shows over." The man tried to stand up but Cam gave him a look the type of look your mother would give to you in a store if she told you not to touch something but you do it anyway and she catches you. So the man sat right back down. Cam tugged on my arm hard pulling me away. I hurried and grabbed my panties. "Damn Cam I wasn't done...you fucking with my money!" Cam backed me hard into the wall. He stared me down. "Listen I can make you more money...but I need you to do something for me".  His grip on my arms loosened, now we were just face to face. "Baby I'll do anything for you". He smiled as I started to laugh. My world was getting blurry.  "There's men whose willing to pay you 500 dollars". "Okay great so where they at?!" "Baby listen to me....you one of my prettiest girls and I love you...I helped you out now it's time for you to help me, okay." "Cam baby what you asking me to do?" "To do a few things for me...you'll have your own private room and they'll treat you nice I'll make sure of that". "You want me to fuck them?!" "Baby...I promise please it's fast money I'm giving to you." I rolled my eyes.  "What...fuck no!" Cam pushed me back into the wall.  "Stay right here I'll be right back". I stood there for about two minutes then Cam came back. He had a shot in his hand. "Here drink this". He handed the shot to me, I swallowed down the liquor quick it was so strong. "Now baby....please just do this not for me but for the both of us..I promise I'm going to make something big out of you". Cam was the only person whose ever really cared about me. He gave me money, clothes, food, and a place to stay. So I believed him when he told me he was helping me.  "Do you love me?" Cam smiled. "Of course baby of course". "Alright...well where is this guy at?" "He's in the back in a special V.I.P. Room he's got big money". "Ok... Then let's go". "First put this face mask on he has a big fetish for mask". I laughed then put the mask on.  ~ I walked into the V.I.P. Room there was only a big red couch that looked like a bed and a man with a mask on sitting on the couch. He was very cocky built and light-skin. No wonder he paid to fuck I thought. My eyes where getting smaller and smaller and everything around me seemed to blur out as I walked up to him. He instantly started talking to me.  "You have a sexy body." I watched his eyes as he traced my body from bottom to top. "How old are you beautiful?" "I'm 16". "A lil young girl I see but you got a real nice body baby... what you gone do for me?" "Anything you want". "Turn around for me". He said. I stood there for a second then turned around as I did he sat up and started feeling on my butt, he was breathing harder and harder with almost every feel. I could feel his breath hitting my back, that's when he turned me around stood up and kissed me on my lips. I tried grabbing his face or side but he put my hands right back down to my sides. "Don't do anything baby". I nodded my head yes as he loosened up his pants grabbed my hands and put them down into them, he made my hands start rubbing on his dick to make it hard. When it got hard he stopped me and sat down on the couch. "Get on up here girl...let me see how pretty you are". I was kinda curious to see how this mysterious man looked. I got on top of him and started rubbing on his dick continuously as I sucked on his neck. He kept smacking my ass which was turning me on and I instantly started to tongue kiss him.  "Shit". He whispered. I laughed then looked at his all black mask.  "Why don't you take your mask off". "Sure babe how about both of us at the same time?"  He insisted on doing so, so I nodded my head yes got up from on top of him backed up turned away from him then took my mask off. "You ready?" I asked. "Yea I'm ready baby turn yo sexy ass around". I turned around, my heart jumped out of my chest at the sight of who it was. The mans face flushed red. I stepped back hastily to the wall almost falling. How could he do this? I couldn't believe I was about to fuck James' dad. The preacher the man whose supposed to be a holy man and help people to get closer to God but in reality he was just sick.  "Please don't tell my son". He jumped to the floor and got on his knees beseeching back and forth for me not to tell James. A tear ran down my eyes.  "I...won't". That's when I ran out the room running into Cam he tried to grab me but I was able to brush passed him. I couldn't believe this, I can't trust anyone. I ran out of the club with no intention where to go and kept running.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER EIGHTEEN 
   ~James~ 
     
   Sylvia and her mother were over for dinner again. June is almost over and I still haven't heard from Queen in almost two weeks. I kept thinking was I terrible? Was my stroke game not good enough? It was my first time but by the way she moaned my name I could tell she liked it unless she was putting on an act. Maybe the people from the church were right. I don't know what's wrong with her or what she has going on, I had to stop thinking about her.  "James hunny...what are you thinking about?" My mother asked. It was us 5 at the table. Sylvia, her mom, my mom and dad, then me.  "Oh nothing I was just...". "He was probably thinking about that nasty girl Queen". Everybody's heads looked up at Sylvia. She had a snobby look on her face.  "Really Sylvia are you that jealous!?" She stood up. "It's not about me being jealous it's about you choosing that girl over me! I've known you for 10 years and you literally just met this dirty girl and you're already head over heels for her always thinking about her!" I stood up too now. "I do not! There's plenty of other stuff I have to think about so don't think you know everything and just because I'm not thinking about you 24/7 doesn't mean I'm thinking about Queen...and don't call her that she's not dirty!" "Calm down both of you!" Both of our mothers shouted. "No mom no Mrs. Parker I have something to say...it seems like everyone has something against this girl and knows literally nothing about her! She needs help and I'm going to help her all that I can...isn't that what church people are supposed to do isn't that what we were told and taught to do!?" "Oh really James Church people! you can't be serious you're only thinking about being with her I'm not stupid!" I didn't say anything I just walked over to Sylvia and got into her face. "Geez ya know what Sylvia you're right you're absolutely right! I'm in love with that girl who you call dirty and nasty ! And I don't love you and I never will!" She smacked me in the face as hard as she could, I balled my fist up ready to hit her back but as I was about to let my anger out on her my dad beat his fist hard on the table. "That's enough you two! This was supposed to be a nice family dinner!" Mrs. Parker stood up as Sylvia began to cry leaving the table.  "We're going to go...this situation seems to be deeply intense and heated right now". She followed behind and grabbed Sylvia and they walked out. We all watched them leave, I was heated I couldn't believe Sylvia would say something like that. I grabbed my keys off the table as my dad started to speak. "Where do you think you're going?" "I'm leaving". "No you're not sit back down son!" My dad stood up sternly with an intense look on his face so I knew he was extremely serious so I sat back down at the table. "Hunny dear please calm down". "No baby we need to talk about James and this girl...son ever since this girl has come into your life I've barley seen you pick up a football or ever write your skits". "Dad I honestly don't care about stupid football or skits! I've never cared you did and have always expected above and beyond out of me it's always been what you wanted!"  "Son you better calm your behind down! You don't know what your talking about its never been just what I wanted it's been about this family and staying together. Which this girl is jeopardizing she's trouble and she's going to bring you down!" "Really dad what happened to always treating people nice and the way you want to be treated huh or did that just fly right out the window of you guys' heads!?" "James dear your dad and I just want the best for you...you've gotten a scholarship son why would you mess that up?" "Because mother I've never wanted this shit!" My mother and father both looked shocked. "The day you think you can cuss your mother out like that is the day I'd kill you! Now you listen to me and listen well before I hurt you!" My mother was now crying and I felt horrible because I'm the reason why. "If you see or even speak to that girl and I find out you are out of this family! Do you hear me? That girl is dangerous and she's not a child of God she will bring hell in your life which will bring you down!" My chest felt like it was going to cave in. I didn't understand why everyone else saw Queen as this big fuck up. I thought everyone was a child of God I really started rethinking my dad's faith in God. When I'd seen that he was finished I rushed to get my keys and walked out of the house. I just couldn't deal with this shit anymore.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER NINETEEN 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   I'd been sleeping in small motels for about a week now ever since the whole situation with James' dad went down. I still couldn't believe that his father was like that, he gave off this genuine impression that he was all godly and wanted the best for people when really he wanted to fuck and bust a nut in teenage girls. I sighed and put on some blue jean shorts and a blue tank top. I then wrapped my hair into a small bun. I was real hungry so I went to get some food. I left out of the motel with my big suitcase and started walking the streets. Most of my clothes were still at Cams house, to be honest I did love that man he was the only man who ever looked out for me. I know James is just as good but he's too good for me, his life is too perfect aside from his fucked up dad. I didn't want to mess up his life I wasn't dumb and naive I knew that's what people thought when they saw us together they thought I was a problem. I walked with my left hand in my pocket and the other one holding my suitcase when a familiar Monte Carlo pulled up on the curb next to me. It was my father, he got out walked around and leaned his back on the passenger side door of the car. He grabbed a cancer stick from behind his ear then lit it up and began to smoke it. "I've really missed you baby girl". "I've been working daddy". "Baby girl I want to apologize for all that I've done... I miss you and I want you back home with me". He stared at me but I couldn't look up at him in eye to eye and keep a straight face because I'd break down.  "Daddy I can't come home". "But why not.... don't you love me?" The wind started to blow my hair to the side.  "I do daddy... I love you a lot". "Then come home with me please...I promise to treat you better. You're the only one I have left since your mother left us". "She didn't leave dad she died!" "Baby I know". "You killed her remember! You beat her so badly don't you remember that! Huh how can't you not remember this stuff!?" He looked away shamefully at the thought of his actions. My heart began to hurt as the thought of the day my mother was beat to death by my father replayed in my head.  "Baby girl I want you to come home! I love you and I promise to be a better father". "You can't do nothing for me". I started to cry as my daddy brung me into his large and warm embrace as he always did in emotional moments like this between us. This time he held unto me so tight and for so long it was the first time in life I actually felt like he meant it. There was something about this hug. "Baby come with me please I really love you and I promise I'm going to take care of you". I looked up at my dad. "You promise?" "Yes baby girl". I grabbed my suitcase and got into his car. I really wanted to believe my dad and everything he said, hopefully he's not going to hurt me anymore. Even though he did beat my mother to her last there was also bad in her. She always complained and kicked him out, she would steal from us, and one day he got angry and just couldn't control his self. I forgave my daddy though and I even forgive him now, because he is my father.  ~ It's been two weeks since I came back home and it was great, it was now the beginning of July.  It felt good to be in my bed my father and I had just got done eating a great steak dinner. He was actually being very friendly. Now I laid in my bed as my father sat on the end of it.  "Love you baby sleep tight". "You too". He gave me a kiss on the forehead, turned the lights off and walked out. I turned over and went to sleep. ~ I woke up to the smell of alcohol all over my face. When I opened my eyes there my dad was standing over me pouring alcohol all over me. I pushed him back and quickly jumped up. He'd obviously been drinking. I knew and had a thought that everything felt too good to be true.  "Come here you lousy bitch!" "Daddy leave me the hell alone!". He ran over and grabbed me by my hair and banged my head hard into the headboard. I screamed in pain, as I felt my head start to bleed. I fell back on my bed as my daddy started taking my shirt off.  "Stop...please". I begged but he took my shirt off he then picked me up and carried me into his room. He threw me on his bed. I was so weak I couldn't even fight back.  "Where you get this huh?!!" Barley able to look up I used the little amount of strength I had to see my dad holding 800 dollars.  "That's my money!" I tried forcing myself to get up but he punched me in my face and I fell to the ground. Blood started to come out of my mouth. He picked me up grabbed me by my neck and slammed me into his glass mirror. Tears rolled down my face as I fell hard back unto the ground glass falling and sticking into my arms. I screamed hard and loud in excruciating pain.  "So you won't tell me where you got it huh ?!" My dad picked me up once again punching me in the face one last time. I could feel my face beginning to swell from his hard hits. That's when he took his pants off then mine forcing himself inside of me. I screamed loud from all the pain. That's when my world went black and my eyes closed. ~ When I woke up my face was down on the hard concrete I got up and looked around. My arms were all bruised up but someone had cleaned the wounds. I had my suitcase lying next to me. I hurried to look inside to see if I still had my 800 dollars but I didn't. I screamed loud in anger at the sight of not seeing it then began to beat on the suitcase. My body ached horribly but not as bad as my heart did. Why did I trust my dad? He took my money and left me in the street. I only had two dollars left in my pocket so I walked to a pay phone and dialed James' number. "James?!" "Hello?" "James this is Queen". "...I haven't heard from you in like a month". "I know I'm sorry but..... I need you could you please come pick me up?" "I'm at the church where are you?" I looked around at my surroundings I didn't know exactly where I was. I looked up to see a street sign. "Parkway". "How the hell did you get down there!?" "James please?" I heard him sigh. "Are you hurt?" "No...". "Well then I'm sure you're fine since you haven't talked to me for this long...you obviously don't need my help anymore". I began to hang up the phone until he started talking again. "I'm on my way just stay there". "Thanks James!" He hung up the phone, I stood there and waited.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY 
   ~James~ 
     
   I pulled up on the curb to see Queen, she looked very tired and weak. I got out and opened the door she looked around then got in. I got back into my car and proceeded to drive when I noticed Queen shivering. "You want some heat?" She shook her head as I turned the heat on. It was very quiet until she start to speak. "I'm sorry bout last time..." "It's fine nothing that I'm not used to". "It's not that I want to hurt you James...it's just we have two lifestyles". I stopped the car and pulled over into an alley. "What fucking! Is that your lifestyle!?Because that's all you ever want to do when you come around...then you just up and leave!" "James you don't know me! Like at all I'm not the girl you need". "Well excuse me I'm sorry for falling in love with you". I placed my head on the steering wheel when Queen grabbed my chin and made me look into her dark brown eyes. She then gently kissed my lips. Her lips were soft and moist.  "You don't need to love me". "I can't help it". "You're this godly boy and I'll fuck your life up". "Why do you think you will?" "Because God doesn't love me...that's why all my life I've been so fucked up! Ever since I was a child nothing has changed!" "Queen God loves you he's just not going to make your life perfect you have to try and be a better person". "You don't know shit about having a bad life so don't tell me God loves me cuss he doesn't!" I couldn't believe Queen was saying this. "Queen God does love you he just doesn't love the stuff you do!" "Oh what the hell! He's never loved me he's put me through so much shit...you don't know nothing about me you church boy!" "You right I don't so why don't you tell me huh!?? You got all these bruises over your body but you never tell me who's hurting you...you must like getting hurt because you keep going back to that same person!" "Fuck you". Queen got out as rain started to pour from the sky. I followed her. "No don't you walk away from me...that's all you know how to do!" "James just leave me alone!" "No I won't! You're always dragging me into your mess then call me to pick you up! I'm tired of picking up all the fucking pieces for you!  "You don't have to do shit! You choose to!" "Yea because unlike all the boys you fuck I'm the only one who gives a fuck about you! But fine I'm done picking up all the pieces for your shitty ass life! Go back to being a hoe!" I didn't even realize what I was saying until I heard Queen gasped. A tear ran down her face as she stared me hard in my eyes. That's when she balled her fist up and punched me hard as ever in my face. "God isn't for everyone and he sure isn't for me! No one will ever love me and it's all Gods fault! You think you the shit because you have God well fuck you and God... I'll go back to being a hoe I'm sure your father knows all about it!" She then ran off into the rain. I felt like shit. I couldn't believe I just talked so bad about Queen but what really stood out from what she said was about my father. I didn't understand what she meant and to be honest I couldn't deal with Queen anymore. She wanted to leave so I had no choice but to let her go. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY ONE 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   His tongue moved around in circles around the outside and inside of my pussy. I grabbed his head as his hands pulled my legs closer into his face, he was trying to keep me from moving but I couldn't help it, it felt so good. I was so aroused by his movements my head fell back making me look up at the ceiling from this magnificent feeling. His tongue moved faster and faster as more and more moans escaped from my mouth. Soon my legs started shaking and my body became weak as I came and squirted all into Cams mouth. He caught and licked all of it up, when he was finished he pulled his head from under the covers and plopped down next to me. He leaned his head back on the head board then lit himself a square. I slowly moved down to lay my head on his chest. "You liked it?" "Yea, a lot ". "Baby if those scars on your body don't heal you getting plastic surgery okay, I'm serious about that ". "Ok". "What's really happening everytime you come back you got new scars on you it's disgusting to look at ". "I told you I got into a fight". "Well baby girl I'm gone teach you how to fight because apparently who you fighting keeps beating yo ass!" He chuckled as I got up from the bed. "That's not funny Cam". "I'm only kidding baby, you know I love you... Now come on over here and sniff some of this yayo."  I looked over at Cam as he cut a small white rock into four sets on his table. After he finished cutting the lines he got a straw and snorted two lines of it up. I knew this wasn't right but with the way I've been feeling I needed something to distract my mind. So I walked over to the table, he handed me the straw I bent down and snorted the last two rows of the stuff. Instantly I felt my body relax.  "See baby, I told you this that good shit". I laughed really hard. We both sat there laid back and smoked a square. ~ I laid next to this random man as he started to put his clothes on.  "You sure know how to move them hips of yours baby girl". I smiled and sat up on the bed. The man stared at me for a while as he was getting dressed. He was as white as snow with sandy brown hair , and real skinny with tattoos covering his chest.  "I'll definitely be seeing you again". He grabbed his jacket, handed me 300 dollars then walked out. I sat there staring at the money as tears rolled down my eyes. Why was I doing this? I know I'm better then this but I need the money. I felt empty and weak. All I really want to do right now is lay next to James in his bed but I knew me and him were done for good. I could tell by the way he talked about me. He was right though, every word he said was right and I hate that it is. I turned over and cried even more. My heart felt like it was constantly getting stabbed at and I couldn't stop the person who was stabbing it. I didn't like this feeling. I hurried and got up to take sum of those pills came gave me, I swallowed them quick, and got back into the bed and slowly drifted to sleep . 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY TWO 
   ~James~ 
     
   I laid in bed staring up at the ceiling throwing my football in my hands. I tossed it back and forth still thinking about what Queen said. I honestly wanted to know what she was doing and how she was doing. It's only been a week since I've spoken to her but it feels like years. I stopped playing with the ball and stared off into space. I wanted to know what she meant and was talking about when she mentioned my father, or maybe she was just mad and saying things out of emotions. Either way overall I was confused about everything and I wanted to know answers. What I really want is to redo everything with Queen, especially what I said to her. It wasn't me it wasn't my character, I was just pissed! I feel stupid, I lost the girl I love. I guess I need to let it go nobody approves of her anyway and it's probably best if I get back to practicing football, school starts in a month. I got out of bed and started getting dressed so I could go outside and practice. Later on today I'm going to take Sylvia out to dinner. I also need to apologize to her, maybe she is the right girl for me. She is classy, respectful, and pretty. I sighed and kept getting ready to go outside. ~ Sylvia's hair was down and curled up into a million complicated swirls. She had on a black tight fitted dress that showed off every inch of her slim body. She really couldn't look any more beautiful. I sat across from her at the table in a booth with a suit on, as we both looked through the menu.  "This is really nice". "Yea...but Sylvia I honestly want to apologize to you for everything I said. I was going through a lot and I was really heated and took my anger out on you." "It's ok...I honestly understand". "Do you really?" "Yes I understand you like that dir....Queen very much". She then gave me a fake smile. I looked down at my hands.  "Actually that's why I brought you here tonight I wanted to tell you I really do like you. It took me a minute and I had to think about it but now I've realized, you're the girl for me". I then looked up and stared Sylvia in her eyes . "I...I really don't know what to say". "Don't say anything...just know I'm really happy you let me take you out and glad we're here together". She blushed a little then started playing with her napkin. "Honestly since we're confessing to each other my feelings for you haven't changed...but I just need to know you aren't going to go back to that girl". "Believe me I'm not...she's long gone...I guess you and the other church people were right". Sylvia reached over and grabbed my hand. "Yes they were right, church people are always right hunny...but it's okay because she was unholy and not right for you". I shook my head ok, as the waitress approached the table.  ~ Later on that night after leaving the restaurant Sylvia and I walked around my neighborhood just talking. It was nice out. "This is...sort of romantic". Sylvia said. "Well I'm happy it is to you". She stopped walking and turned to face me. Her hair blew with the light wind.  "Kiss me."  I was surprised to hear her say that but yet it still made me happy. So I did, I leaned in and kissed Sylvia's lips they were soft. She gently held unto my neck as I grabbed unto her small waist and continued to kiss her. She kept kissing me slowly putting her tongue into my mouth. It felt as if our tongues were dancing around together like ballerinas.  "You want to go inside?" I asked her. She looked me in my face for a good minute then shook her head yes. My parents weren't home tonight and I really did want to have sex with Sylvia. So we went inside of the house and walked to my room. She sat on the end of my bed and I sat next to her. I pulled her closer to me and we started to tongue kiss again. I slowly put my hands up her skirt gently touching and rubbing the inside of her thighs. She started to kiss me more fiercely as I slid a side of her panties to the other side and slowly rubbed my fingers along her clit. She started to moan as I rubbed faster. Her pussy was getting wetter and wetter as I kept rubbing it faster. I took my hands from under her dress and laid her down on the bed taking her dress off. When I finished I took my pants off. I got in the bed and started to kiss her, I was kissing her lips then moved down to her boobs kissing and sucking on them. Her boobs were nice and big, but that's when she suddenly stopped me. "I've... I've never done this before". I was stunned by what she said, I actually thought Sylvia wasn't a virgin. "It's ok...I'll be slow and gentle until you get the hang of it."  I got up to get a condom off of my night stand. I hurried to put it on, then came over to the bed and gently opened Sylvia's legs. I started to slowly move up her body, getting ready to put my dick inside of her. She flinched as I slowly put myself inside of her, she tightly held unto my back as I was slowly stroking inside of her. I was starting to increase my speed so she pulled and held onto me even tighter. "Slow down". She weakly moaned but I couldn't control myself and I started to go faster, her pussy was really tight and wet around my dick and I was loving it. I kept moving faster and faster as my dick moved in and out of her as she screamed my name loudly back and forth. That's when I came, I then pulled out and moved to the other side and laid next to her in the bed. She then out of nowhere rolled over on top of me and whispered "I love you" into my ear. I don't know if it was the moment, by instinct or even how good her pussy felt whichever one it maybe I don't know but I whispered back and said, "I love you too". ~ Sylvia and I were a thing now, my parents loved it and so did the people at church. It was July now and I hadn't even thought of Queen once. Everyone was right about her, she wasn't the right girl for me. Sylvia was, I knew that and had no problem with it now, everything started to go back to normal. I was practicing football more and worked harder on my skits. Life was good.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY THREE 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   I held unto Cam as he carried me into his house. He took me to his room and laid me on the bed.  "You need to get some sleep". "No Cam! Please C'mon give me some stuff". I sat up on my knees in the bed as he stood up beside me. "Ok this is it though, alright only for tonight". Cam grabbed the coke out of his pocket sitting the bag on his table he opened it and started cutting up the lines. I got out of bed and walked over to him after he finished cutting 4 lines, I sniffed the first row. "That's it". "No! Cam please". I begged Cam, he sighed and sniffed a row for himself. "You need to stop asking for this shit...gave it to you only for one time so you could get your self together...this shit can and will seriously fuck you up". "C'mon you said it yourself, you gave it to me. What did you expect to happen?"  Cam didn't say anything, I took his shirt off and started to kiss all on his neck and smooth caramel chest.  "C'mon let's make love". Cam smiled as I took my shirt off. "You know how to make me happy". Cam got up and laid on the bed, I hurried to sniff those last two rows. The coke flew into my nose making it sting. I started to feel weak but calm. I slowly walked over to Cam, as I was moving closer he started to become blurry. Soon my chest began to burn, it felt like someone was stabbing me. I tried to hold unto the table but I fell hardly to the ground. I heard lots of movement and yelling, then my world went black. ~ I woke up in a white room. I looked around coming to notice I had I.Vs in my arms. What the fuck happened I thought. That's when a tall blonde lady came into the room. "Thankgod you are awake!" "What...why am I hear?" "Try to relax sweetie...you've been out for a week now, your body isn't fully...how do I say operable yet". "What...what do you mean?" "Well you were brought in because you overdosed on cocaine hun...now we've called your father and he should be able to pick you up when you're ready to leave..." I cut her off. "I'm ready to go now!" "Relax... Please relax now it's very important that you and your father agree on checking you into rehab to get you clean and make sure this doesn't happen again...you shouldn't be doing that stuff it's not healthy for you or the baby ". "What are you...what do you mean a baby!?It...it was an accident. I need to make a phone call". I tried to get up but she held me back down. "Sweetie you're almost 3 months pregnant...You need to relax...if it wasn't for the man who found you on the street you wouldn't be alive...I need you to understand that you really need help". "Okay....I just need to make a phone call". She sighed and pointed to the phone then walked out. I couldn't believe I'd overdosed and that I was pregnant. I needed to call James.  ~  An hour passed as I heard footsteps coming towards my room. I was putting my clothes on as my dad walked in. "Shit" I was hoping it was James. He looked angry. "I can't believe this!" "Dad I already have someone coming to get me...just go home". "No you look a mess!" He closed the door then bum rushed me into the wall. I grabbed his hands as he tried to choke me. "Leave me alone!" I pushed him. "Or what?!" "I'll tell them what you did to me and mom!" He pushed me again and grabbed my neck pushing me hard into the wall. I tried to fight him back. He somehow managed to grab ahold of my neck and started choking me. His hands were wrapped around my neck hard gripping tighter and tighter like an anaconda suffocating it's prey. I struggled and squirmed trying to get away but he was too strong. My fathers eyes were black and all I saw in them was hell. I started to feel my self fade away, but right at the last second James swings open the door, his face was In shock complete and utter awe. He immediately jumped into action, he ran over and knocked my father into the ground I fell as I started coughing to catch my breath. I watched in agony as my father and James fought. I screamed for help as tears fell from my eyes, security and staff rushed in and broke them up. All I could do was sit there and cry. ~ After security came my father left and James took care of me. He was taking me back to a hotel. "Is that the man whose been hurting you?" I didn't say anything. James pulled the car over into an empty car lot and turned the engine off. "Tell me! Is that the man whose been hurting you and putting those bruises on your body ?!" I shook my head as tears fell from my eyes. "I'm pregnant". James eyes became big. "Is...is...it mines?" "No it's my fathers". "What.. But I thought you said he was dead?!" "I lied...I didn't know how to tell you...it's been my dad all this time...I fucking overdosed on coke and I didn't even know I was pregnant!" "I can't believe this...is the baby ok?" "Yes but James I don't know what to do with a baby...I barley can take care of myself...I don't know what to do. My life has always been shitty, now there's a baby coming and its life will be shitty because of me as its mother. I'm so fucked up, my life is fucked up, everything just so fucked up!" James didn't say anything he just leaned over and held me tight. I pulled him tighter and started to cry in his arms. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR 
   ~James~ 
     
   I didn't know what to do all I could do was hold Queen. Her light sobs touched and ached my heart, I didn't know how to help her. I couldn't think of which part was worse, her overdosing and discovering that she's pregnant, or that she's pregnant by her dad. All of it was just too much, I knew Queen had a story but I didn't know it was this deep. She lifted her head from my chest and looked up at me, her curls were all tangled together and her eyes were so low I could barley see them. She looked so jaded I didn't know how to help. She sat up in my car and tried to fix her tangled hair. "I'm sorry for getting tears all on your shirt". I looked down at my shirt, large wet tears stained it. "It's ok really this shirt is old anyway". Queen just gave me a fake smile. "Now you know my story...now you know everything". I didn't say anything I couldn't think of a response I just looked at her. "My baby's gonna have a prostitute as a mother whose so fucked up and doesn't even know how to take care of herself unless it's sex. Ha! Sounds like a great thing to tell her". She started to laugh, I still didn't know what to do or say. I didn't know how to help heal her heart from all the pain it's been through.  "She's gonna love me! Her prostitute ass mother! She's gonna come to me and say hey mother how do I get a job and my response is going to be oh baby all you gotta do is just open your legs and take the best offer you get that'll do the trick! open your legs and everything will be ok. Or, or one day she's going to ask whose my daddy mommy and I'm going to say oh hunny it's your grandpa, yea I know sounds bizarre but he's also your father too...! I hurried to stopped Queen from saying any more as she started to sob loudly, tears from her eyes flowed down her face like hard rain on a stormy night. I grabbed her but she pushed me away.  "Just stop! Stop it!" Queen quickly rushed and got out of the car, I got out to catch her. The wind outside was blowing hard.  "What do you want me to do Queen, I'm here ok I'm trying!?" "Leave me alone! Haven't you noticed I'll fuck your life up don't you see that!? Don't you see what I'm doing to you already?!" "It doesn't have to be like this, I can get you help we could go to the cops". "Cops! Cops will never believe some whore!" "You're wrong your not a whore I don't care what's said about you. Queen you're a beautiful and smart girl and your father, your father he's a sick minded individual just like the rest of the men who use you! If I would have known that was him in the room I would have broken every bone of his, because you don't hurt people. Especially the ones that I love". Queen walked over and she started to kiss me, I immediately kissed her back. Out of no where she suddenly stopped kissing me and turned around walking back to the car to get inside. I followed behind her, but she didn't get into the front seat instead she sat in the back seat. So I did as well. We began to kiss again, she then got on top of me and started rubbing on my dick. "Queen... Please stop". I knew this wasn't right and so did Queen but she kept doing it anyway , she kissed me more and more on my neck then reaching her hands down she pulled my pants down. She then took off my boxers and started to jack off my dick, I grabbed her. "Queen please stop". "Isn't this what you want!?" The grasp of her hand around my dick became harder as she was pulling her shorts and panties down while trying to get on top of it. She started to bounce.  "Queen...I don't wan..."  She shut me up as she rode me moving her hips and butt cheeks. I grabbed and pulled her closer holding unto her real tight. She moaned as I saw tears fall from her eyes. I didn't know what was going on. She moved faster and faster, I was trying not to enjoy this.  "Queen...please stop". She kept going faster as more tears were falling from her eyes. "No daddy you like to see me cry remember?!"  She stuck her tongue down my throat still bouncing on top of me more and more. I could feel my self inside of her almost ready to cum. I knew none of this was right at all so I hurried and pushed her off me. I couldn't deal with Queen I didn't know how to help her. She stared at me as I was pulling my pants up.  "Please hurry and get dressed". "What's wrong don't you like fucking me huh, don't you like hurting me!?" That's when she punched me hard in my face. I grabbed her hands as she tried to do it again. She was going crazy.  "Queen you have to go!" She loosened her grip then put her clothes on. "Send me away! Like everyone else does!" I didn't know what just happened but I couldn't deal with it either. After she finished getting dressed I got out and opened the door for her. "I'm sorry Queen you're right I don't know how to help you". She shook her head and wiped her face. "You never could". I pulled my wallet out, I had 300 dollars I handed it to her. She took it. "Thanks". She walked away slowly. I rubbed my head, it was hurting from all the thoughts roaming around inside moving fast like a whirlwind. So I just got back in my car and sat there.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   I fixed myself up in a local bathroom, it was about 4 in the morning now. I needed to find a real place to stay, I couldn't keep going to hotels. I needed to save my money. I started to walk the late hot and windy streets. Nothing could make the pain deep in my heart fade away, I really don't think anything could make it disappear. I had to leave this place, I had to get out I needed to disappear. I touched my stomach and sighed. I started to wonder did Cam leave me here all alone in that cold hospital, did he dump me out on the street in a panic after I overdosed. I shook my head, I won't win no matter what I do. A dark car pulled up to the side of me. The window raised down and I peeked inside. A white man sat behind the wheel, he was at least in his late thirties.  "Can I do som'n for you girl?" "Nah...just looking for a place to stay". "How bout' you get on in and I'll take you back to my place, you can stay there". I looked around wondering if I should get in the car, the worse thing he can do is leave me for dead rather then kill me. I sighed and got in.  
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY SIX 
   ~James~ 
     
   The dinner table was extremely quiet I could even hear my thoughts over everyone's forks hitting their plates trying to pick food up. Everyone was silent my father, mother, and sister all ate their dinner quietly. I just couldn't take the silence anymore so I started a conversation. "Mom and dad I need to talk ". My mother looked up from her food. "Yes hun anything". I aimlessly looked around the room as my family stared and waited for me. "I have to help Queen". "The sneaky little girl."  My sister tried to mumble. "Shut the hell up Caroline!" She got quiet as my father stood up. "Son now listen..."  I cut him off. "No father you need to listen to me you all do! I won't keep sitting here and hurting myself. God has spoken to me and he wants me to help Queen...do you guys have any idea what this girl has been through?! Her father rapes her and now she's pregnant by him and she feels like the only way she can get money is by selling her body!" "Oh my!" My mothers face was dumb founded. My dad quietly sat back down not saying a word. "I don't know about you guys but God brought her into my life for a reason, he wants me to help her and I am going to! But I can't do that without you guys help please mom, dad I beg you...support me and let me help her". My mothers face still looked shocked. "What about Sylvia, I thought you guys were together...but listen son...Son I already told you what needed to be done...that girl is trouble...her life and situation is something we cannot help. God can and will lead her on the right path himself". I was shocked at the words that came out of his mouth. I couldn't believe my father could say such a thing.  "Dad c'mon please I love this girl I can't bare to see her like this...she has a baby on the way". "Son please stop, you're only going to hurt yourself and make your life miserable trying to fix something you can't... A girl like her doesn't want help. Your mother and I tried before it's just not possible." "Mom?" My mom just stared. "Hunny you've got college and your life ahead of you...yes I know it is very misfortunate for that girl and the way her life's been but we can't and aren't the right people that God wants to help her...I'm sorry". I stood up. "Yea I figured you all would say that...I'm really starting to question all of your faith in God! All of you are going to go to hell!" I rushed and stormed out of the house. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN 
   ~Queen~ 
     
   I abruptly woke up from my sleep, in a tremendous hurry to get out of bed and raced to the bathroom as vomit was rising from my stomach and filling my mouth, I made it to the toilet at the last second discharging everything from my mouth into it. I heard the door behind me being opened, I hurried wiped my mouth so I could turn around to face the white man named David I had just met a week ago.  "What the hell is this?!" "Nothing...I.. I'm sorry I'll clean it up". I got up but as I was about to leave and head out of the door he stepped over and stood in front of me. "Where do you think your going?" He started to move closer towards me. "No..Nowhere". "Get on your knees!"  He forcibly pushed my head down guiding it to his crotch. I tried to force my way up but he pressed my head down harder. So that's when I grabbed his dick and gripped on it hard. He instantly jumped up in the air and pushed me hard to the ground with enough force to make me slide on the floor. I fell making a loud thud I tried to get up, but he was already standing over me and punched me hard in my face. He then pulled me by my leg and dragged me to the front door kicking me out. I sat there on his porch bleeding, I think it was about midnight or at least close to it. He opened the door throwing my stuff at me.  "Get the fuck outta here you loose ass bitch!" I picked up my stuff hastily as he closed the door. I ran to the door and banged on it screaming"I have no place to go!"  He didn't answer at all. "Fuck!" I yelled loudly. I cleaned myself up then started to walk the streets once again hoping to find somewhere to stay.  ~ I had been walking for about a hour now, the street I was on looked familiar as if I'd walked it before, that's when I came across the church. The outside lights were all off, but I had no one to go to or any other place to go so I walked up the stairs to knock on the door and see if anyone was there no one answered I looked around making sure no one saw me I tried to push the huge church door open to see if the door was unlocked, surprisingly it was. I slowly walked in just in case someone actually was still here, as I walked around I caught sight of the alter, I walked up to it. I stood there for a minute I looked up and saw a huge statue that looked like it was of Jesus standing high next to the huge church walls. I walked over to a pillar and sat my stuff down in it then returning back to the alter. I didn't know what to do so I kneeled down and sat there. I didn't know why but tears immediately began to fall from my eyes. "God...Jesus...whichever one hears me I really just need you to listen. I'm sorry I'm so so so sorry. I don't understand what I've done wrong to deserve any of the things that have happened in my life but I'm begging you to please forgive me for what ever it may be?! Please just forgive me! Everything I've done up to this point please God please! I beg of you. I don't want this anymore I don't want this lifestyle I want a better one not only for me but for my baby, I want you God I need and want you in me and my babies life! I know I sound like an idiot because I don't know how to pray but God if you can hear me please I am on my knees and I give myself to you." I stood up to see if anything had happened or changed but out of nowhere something inside of me made me fall back to my knees. Tears came flowing down my face again more and more as I laid on the floor of the church grieving to God for forgiveness.  "God!!... listen please listen! I need you I want you, I want to feel the same happiness you bring to people's lives like James I want to be on a better path. God I'm sorry I won't do this stuff anymore I don't want to get around anymore I really want to live, I want a good life for me and my baby, I want to be there for my baby! So God please send me a sign a message or something so I can know your real and can hear me please!!" I was starting to feel angry and disappointed nothing happened at all not a single thing no sign had come. I angrily began to beat on the ground as hard as I could hurting myself with every hit to the floor.  "God tell me Please! Please Lord I give myself to you!" Suddenly I heard a voice tell me to kneel, I thought someone was behind me I turned around to see no one was there but I heard the voice again tell me "Kneel down and close your eyes" so I did, I kneeled down and closed my eyes. After telling me to kneel down the voice told me. "Now pray and ask for forgiveness and for your deepest desire". "Lord please, please forgive me and all the wrong I have done in my life, please take away all of this horrible pain I've held onto for all of these years from all of these men that have used me, I need you I need you here with me, I need you in my life I'm truly and finally ready for you lord". Still kneeling down my hair began to fall into my face, the tears coming down my face felt like water falls I screamed as loud as my lungs would allow me but still nothing happened, I started to cry even more, thinking I knew it no one wants me not even God wants me. "This is my last attempt Lord.... I know I'm not the best of people or children of yours in the world and I haven't walked in your shoes trying to follow your footsteps like everyone else who have you in there life but I want to now and I'm ready, I'm ready to give myself to you, I'm ready to give my everything please God I'm ready to give my all!" Suddenly I felt as if something had hooked onto me and was tugging hard on my body, all I could do was fall out. I could feel everything from head to toe as my spirit and body began to heal, my legs were no longer tired and I felt strong. I no longer was aching anymore and my heart, my heart no longer had pain or hate in it. That's when I heard the voice return again and it told me to say Jesus has saved me. I did exactly what I was told. "I am saved". I knew it had to be God because I felt free, I felt cleansed and I felt reborn or renewed the feeling felt sensational. I'd never felt such warmth before, I stayed in the church the whole night. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT 
   ~ James~ 
     
     
   In two weeks I'll be going off to college. I've been getting everything ready for when I take off. Honestly with everything that I've been going through I'm ready to leave. I sat on my bed next to Sylvia. I really liked this girl and I felt bad for cheating on her. I haven't heard from Queen in a good month, I didn't know if that was good or bad.  "What you thinking about?" Sylvia asked. I looked at her shrugged my shoulders then grabbed her hand, she smiled and kissed me. She then got up and fixed her hair. "I'll see you tomorrow...ma has her new boyfriend over and they want me to come for dinner". "Have fun with that". She nodded her head yes then left out of my room. I laid back on my bed starring at the ceiling thinking about college.  ~ I pulled into IHOP's lot then got out my car. It was around midnight and I was starving. I walked in and found a small table towards the back of the restaurant and sat down. I Immediately started flipping through the menu. I studied the menu hard when the waitress came, she asked me what I wanted to drink. I looked up from my menu in aghast as I saw Queen standing by me. She had a job.  "Wow...Queen it's good to see you". She just smiled with her pink apron on.  "Hi...". "Since when did you start working?" "A coupla weeks ago...it was time". "I'm happy for you". She smiled brightly. "I'm happy for myself too...now what can I get you?" "I'm sorry... I'm just...it's like wow". She laughed I did too. I studied Queen hard specially her small round baby bump.  "You're getting big". She looked down at her stomach and rubbed her belly.  "Yea I am...in another month I'm going to go find out the babies gender". "That's exciting...I'm heading to Mizzou in two weeks". "Congrats...I haven't been to school in almost a year...I'm not really that smart". "No don't say that...you're beautiful and I know you'll get a better job than this and you'll see". She smiled.  "I got saved James...I'm not doing those things anymore I'm going to be there for my baby". I couldn't believe it, I was honestly really happy for Queen. She had found God this is what I wanted for her. "Queen you don't know how happy I am for you that's good that you have God now". She shook her head. That's when someone in the back called for her. "I'll see you around...good luck in college I'll bring you a water back". I didn't want her to leave but she needed to make her money, the right way. So I just nodded my head. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER TWENTY NINE 
   ~Queen~ 
     
     
   I walked the dark late night streets leaving from work. I'd saved up enough money to live in a motel for a little while, but today I needed to see my father. I needed to finally let him know that I've forgiven him for everything he's done but also that I'm going to leave for good. I wanted to be like James and get out of St. Louis which is exactly what I needed to do, especially for the sake of my baby that's going to be born soon. I thought about my life as I was walking "I'm not going to live like this for long, everyday God opens a new door for me". I know I need to walk the right path to get to where I want and need to be in life and here is were it starts, going back to where it all started. Back home where clean bed sheets turned into bloody sheets and memories of heartbreak and pain. Where my father rapes me, how he wakes up the next day not remembering anything of what he's done to me, but me I remember it all. Every fight, every struggle to over take him, every second and minute of every time. Looking at the scars that are left on my body remind me everyday of those times and the dreams I have at night turn into nightmares that will forever and always linger in my mind, but my soul, my soul is what's left of me. God has healed it and it no longer needs love from sexual perverts. I took a deep breath then smiled as I had arrived to the house, I could hear classical music playing as I walked up and opened the dingy screen door. I sighed a little before walking in, loud classical music still playing, I heard it coming from the dining room.  "Dad?" The music still playing as I walked slowly down the hall. I was wondering "Why was this music so loud?" Boxes of stuff where everywhere all around the house, and nothing even seemed to be here anymore. What was going on I thought? "Dad?!"  I asked again, but still I didn't hear a response or anything, that's when suddenly I heard a loud gun shot making my ears ring. I fell hard to the ground ducking for cover. I covered my ears with my hands as I was ducked down In a position school teachers would make you get in if it were a tornado drill, I didn't hear another shot after the first. That's when I felt this ache, this huge ache in my heart that soon spread and caressed my whole body. I became weak at the thought of what I believed happened and what that shot was from, and used for. I quickly got up trying to block the image of what I already knew was there. I fled down the hall into the dining room to see my fathers body in the floor stale and lifeless he was lying on the ground with the gun right next to him, blood began to ooze and leaked onto the floor like a gallon of spilled milk from his head. I rushed over to him and kneeled down as tears fell from my face. I lifted his head up and placed it on my lap, blood soaking all over my blue jeans. I held unto my father, screaming and crying.  "Whyyyyyyyyyy?!?! Why God why?!?!??" I pulled him up more bringing him closer to me. Why, why did he do this?! Right when I was going to tell him I forgive him for everything that's happening! He didn't have to do this I could have gotten him help!  I couldn't do anything else but cry and scream more and more seeing my father like this, his eyes were rolled to the back of his head. I stared at him for almost ten minutes screaming wake up, wake up I forgive you, I forgive you !! I stopped screaming and got up still crying, I had to leave, the longer I stayed here the harder it would be for me to leave. I laid my father on the ground and kissed him on the lips and hugged him one last time. I walked down the hall then ran out the back door when I saw police cars and an ambulance approaching my house. I ran fast down the street not looking back as my tears were rolling down my face and my pants still drenched in blood. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER THIRTY 
   ~James~ 
     
     
   I was upstairs in my room still packing my things into baskets and huge boxes when I suddenly started to hear loud consistent banging noises, it was coming from the front door. I left my room to see who it was, as I walked down the steps I saw my mother opening door. She started to scream in horror of what ever was in front of her as she opened the door. I quickly ran down the stairs to see Queen standing there breathing hard and panting as if she'd just got done running a marathon, I noticed she was completely covered in blood. My father and sister also came to see what was going on because of all the noise from my mother screaming. They both moved in front of me to see who was there. Everyone stood there surprised with their faces stuck in shock, I immediately popped out of my trance of astonishment and pushed past everyone to run out and hold Queen. She fell into my embrace as I wrapped my arms around her.  "James....James my dad he's, he's d--e--ad. He sh--ot h-im--sel-f!" I could hardly understand what she was saying, all I could hear was mumbles.  "Queen baby what is it?" She held unto me laying her face on my chest, I could feel her tears running so I hugged her tighter. That's when my father yanked Queen away. She fell hardly to the ground .  "Dad what the hell! She's pregnant?!" "Young lady you need to leave NOW!" Anger began to arise in my body, as I watched Queen struggle to get up. I fiercely and angrily charged towards my father punching him in his face. He fell to the ground with a loud thud ,I rushed him again before he could get up from the first hit. I started punching him over and over again he pushed me off of him and grabbed ahold of my hands. I fell backwards landing on my back as my mom and sister broke us up. "Stop it!" They both were yelling back and forth. We both stood up, my fist still clenched and ready to fight.  "Dad I love this girl and you're not going to kick her out I won't let you!" "James baby listen to your father please!" "No to HELL WITH THAT AND WHAT HE HAS TO SAY!"  My father tried to charge at me but my mother stood in his way and stopped him. I went over to Queen and grabbed her.  "Queen you can stay here". "No you can not! The girl is dangerous look at her!" "My father just killed himself! Don't you have some type of heart! Huh bishop Jones!!?! Or should I say client! Huh remember just a month ago you wanted to have sex with me!!" Everyone mouths dropped. I was confused and I didn't know what to think. My father got quiet but Queen kept talking.  "There's nothing Godly about you! Your just like all the other men, which is disgusting! You're just like me! You cheat on your wife you play like you're this good man when really in secret you pay prostitutes like me to fuck! Oh you're no better then me! Why huh?!? Why do you try!? James, James I love him why do you want him to leave me alone so bad?! Because I'm trouble, because I'm dirty?! What is it huh??! Because I thought God loved everyone and just because we make mistakes doesn't make us monsters. For once in my life I feel love and that's because of James...James loves me and I love him... If me leaving has to help him then sure I'll leave!" Queen headed for the door. I couldn't even look my father in his eyes. My mother and sister sat there and cried. My father tried to comfort my mother but she pushed him away and smacked him as hard as she could in his face.  "You disgust me! I can't believe you did this to that poor girl! You weren't trying to help her. You were trying to protect yourself! Lord please forgive me because I made a big mistake letting that girl walk out my sight the first time". I looked at my father and just shook my head. My father started to cry when the door shut. I ran out the door to chase Queen. She was running fast.  "Queen wait!" I tried to catch up with her but she began to run faster. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER THIRTY ONE 
   ~ Queen~ 
     
     
   I had to catch my breath. I was breathing heavily trying to suck in as much air as I could while bending over and placing my hands on my knees to rest. It was dark out and I was leaving tonight. James's car pulled up to the curb on the side of me. I sighed and got in. "James you have to stay away from me... I'm trouble, remember?". "Queen that's not true. You aren't trouble...why didn't you tell me about my father before?" "I knew it would hurt you and your perfect little Brady bunch family". "I can't imagine everything you're going through right now...your father he's what...what's happened?" "I walked home today and he shot himself". "I...I'm so, so, sorry baby". I wiped my eyes as I held James's hand. We looked eye to eye.  "James I'm ok now I've finally found God and I'm going to start a new life...you need to start yours and go to college and become something...I'll catch up behind trust me". He didn't say anything instead he brought me in close to him and our lips touched, I hesitantly pulled back at first but then I gave in and I grabbed unto him and continued kissing him, our tongues touching. James made a slight grunt and grabbed unto my hips tighter, I bit his bottom lip as he kissed me more aggressively.  "James...I love you". James stopped kissing me and stared at me for awhile. Honestly this was my first time ever telling someone I loved them and I actually meant it.  "I love you too Queen". "James I love you so much I have to leave..." James sat back and sighed. He shook his head like he understood. "James I love you and one day we can catch up with each other and be happy and I'll be ok and then we c..." James cut me off.  "I know Queen...I love you". James and I kissed one last time then I got out of his car. I knew this was just the beginning and one day James and I will meet again. 
   
   
   
   CHAPTER THIRTY TWO 
   ~James~ 
     
     
   Four years later 
   "Let's toast to my boy getting drafted into the NFL!" My family and friends all screamed in joy and excitement, so I laughed and smiled too. I walked over to the crowd while everyone had drinks in their hands. I had been drafted to the DENVER BRONCOS. Everyone in my life has moved on, Sylvia got married once she turned 19, we didn't last long with the whole long distance and different colleges thing now she lives in Minnesota. My mother and sister smiled at me as I walked slowly to the crowd. A lot has happened these past four years. My mother divorced my father and he left somewhere, we haven't heard from him since. I still go to church and when I retire I'm going to become a pastor. My sister has two kids both are boys and a husband named Joseph. My life was going on track, I didn't plan on ever becoming an NFL player but I'm good at it and the money is great. I finally reached the front. I smiled at everyone as I started to speak into the mic.  "I am just so thankful to be here in this spot with my family and friends all supporting me. Most of all I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for God...God has brung me so much gratefuln..." That's when a pretty, beautiful woman walked into the room. She was thick, her hair was long and curly and her dark skin glimmered. She had on this long tight black dress showing off every inch of her perfect body. My mouth dropped. "Queen?" "James?" 
   ~THE END~ 
   
   
   Publication Date: August 22nd 2017 https://www.bookrix.com/-ple6aeb000a8945