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Description: SCP-8210 is a mid-thirties Caucasian male of average height and build. SCP-8210's anomalous trait causes reality to shift around him to match stereotypes and tropes of action fiction, with a specific emphasis on superhero and comic book fiction. These changes seem to follow a path-of-least-resistance principle where reality is changed as little as possible. The changes have never been observed directly, with those directly affected unable to recall how the change occurred. SCP-8210 has not demonstrated any control over when or how this ability manifests. The uncontrollable nature of the reality shifts reportedly causes SCP-8210 a high degree of annoyance. Evidence suggests that changes are more likely to occur if people, places, objects, scenarios, etc. resemble in some capacity superhero story archetypes. This theorized anomalous trait, combined with SCP-8210's high degree of knowledge of superhero tropes and resistance to containment, makes the acquisition and long-term containment of SCP-8210 exceptionally difficult.
Locations affected by SCP-8210 will typically shift to match a set of stereotypical locations where a superhero would be present. Not all locations visited by SCP-8210 are affected and not all changes will affect the entirety of the location. These changes will revert when SCP-8210 is no longer in the vicinity or otherwise able to consciously observe the location, such as while asleep. Some examples include but are not limited to: The basement of SCP-8210’s residence becoming a large underground cave filled with advanced computers, various nonlethal weaponry, and a heavily-stylized 1960's automobile, all matching a particular theme that varies each time SCP-8210 enters.
• A majority of larger, empty city buildings entered by SCP-8210 becoming abandoned warehouses filled with nondescript and generic wooden and cardboard boxes. These buildings will typically have various long chains and ropes hanging from the ceiling that seem to serve no functional purpose.
A skyscraper having a majority of floors transformed into laboratories or a series of long hallways. The last five floors were transformed into a single penthouse apartment doubling as a headquarters, including a security room receiving camera feeds from every floor, an ornate desk featuring a button-activated trapdoor in front of it, and a large balcony overlooking the city.
Containment cells becoming traditional prison cells. These typically include floor- to-ceiling bars with 0.3-meter spacing and a large padlock.
People affected by SCP-8210 will have their behavior, speech patterns, and outfits altered to match stereotypical characters a superhero may interact with. These individuals will often have their physical abilities and skills altered to match the stereotypical role they fill. Any changes will revert when SCP-8210 is no longer within a certain, fluctuating range of these individuals or is no longer consciously aware of them.
Any changes that occur during the anomalous alterations will remain.1 Some examples include but are not limited to: Foundation MTF members having their outfits transformed into brightly colored tights with matching eye masks. When engaging with SCP-8210, these MTF members have been shown to follow the rules of mook chivalry.2 Law enforcement officers attempting to contact SCP-8210 to handle both real and nonexistent crimes on their behalf. This behavior is often accompanied by a red rotary phone appearing somewhere in the police precinct which will always call the cellphone of SCP-8210 regardless of what number is dialed.
Individuals engaging in coordinated criminal activity having their outfits changed to either brightly colored tights or stereotypical black and white striped clothing.
These individuals will typically either shift their criminal goals to something more absurd or will go about their previous criminal endeavors in an absurd fashion.
Recovery Log: SCP-8210 was first discovered on 03/22/2021. News footage was being broadcast of a bank robbery happening in San Diego, California. The robbers were dressed in matching bright purple long-sleeve sweaters, black pants, black beanies, and black masks over their eyes. They were brandishing bright purple walking canes as if they were assault rifles. Footage showed two of the robbers spraying bright yellow smoke from the canes.
Those who the gas reached appeared to fall unconscious, with many of them tilting back and placing the back of their hand on their forehead first. This was enough on its own to warrant dispatching Foundation agents to investigate.
Arriving agents witnessed SCP-8210 combatting the criminals. SCP-8210 appeared annoyed and was heard complaining and loudly sighing during the fight. The criminals displayed an unusual lack of physical coordination, some tripping over nothing and others accidentally punching their allies with wild haymakers. Each criminal seemed to fall unconscious after falling once or receiving a single punch, kick, or shove from either SCP-8210 or their allies.
Agents disguised as local law enforcement apprehended SCP-8210 at the conclusion of the fight. SCP-8210 came willingly and commented that he was unsure if he would be awarded the key to the city by the mayor or if he would be gently scolded for taking the • • • • • • law into his own hands. All other individuals involved were amnestisized, and a cover story about a flash mob was spread due to the highly public nature of the incident.
Post-Recovery Interview Log Interviewed: SCP-8210 Interviewee: Dr. Harcroft <Begin log> Dr. Harcroft: Please state your name for the record.
<SCP-8210 sighs and massages his temples> SCP-8210: I take it you're not really cops?
Dr. Harcroft: No, we are not. Now, please state your name for the record.
SCP-8210: So, what is this? Are you a minon? A goon? You work for some big bad math teacher or something?
Dr. Harcroft: Pardon me, but what makes you think we work for a math teacher?
SCP-8210: I don't know. I just saw the real geometric symbol on everyone's costumes. There's always a theme. Sometimes it's ice, sometimes it's jungle, this one time it was glowsticks, which was admittedly pretty funny. I figured maybe y'all's theme was math.
Dr. Harcroft: I assure you, we are not in costume and we do not work for an evil mathematician.
<SCP-8210 waves his hands apologetically> SCP-8210: You can't blame me for being suspicious. This kinda stuff has been happening to me a lot lately. So you're not regular law enforcement, but you're not comic book supervillains. That begs the question: who are you guys and why am I here?
Dr. Harcroft: Our organization deals with the anomalous, and we have reason to believe you are anomalous in some way. Now, for the last time, please state your name for the record.
SCP-8210: Jeez, sorry, calm down, will ya? My name's Max Mayfield. So, what are you guys? Is this like Men in Black, but for anything weird instead of just aliens?
<Dr. Harcroft shrugs> Dr. Harcroft: I suppose that's actually pretty accurate. I will say, though, we tend not to kill or destroy as often as Will Smith and Harvey Lee Jones.
SCP-8210: What do you mean, tend not to? That's not making me feel real confident about being here.
Dr. Harcroft: Your presence here is not optional, I am afraid. I can assure you that as long as you do not try to actively harm anyone, you will be perfectly safe. We simply wish to understand what you are and how you do what you do so that we can prevent it from happening moving forward.
SCP-8210: I would actually love that. Honestly, I don't know why this stuff keeps happening to me. It's pretty annoying, though, and if you guys can make it stop, I'd be in your debt.
Dr. Harcroft: How long has this been a problem for you?
SCP-8210: I dunno. I really started noticing maybe a month ago, but who's to say if it hasn't been happening for longer?
Dr. Harcroft: I see. And do you have any idea what triggers these events?
SCP-8210: I don't. They just happen. I'll be going about my normal day, and then suddenly it's not so normal. My basement looks like a cheap knockoff of the Bat Cave. I tried to go out for some drinks with my buddies one time and wound up in a bar fight where every table and chair shattered into pieces at the slightest touch. I've never seriously gotten hurt or anything, but it's just all so stupid, you know? I remember watching Adam West's Batman growing up.
Did you ever watch it?
Dr. Harcroft: I am familiar with it, but I can't say I've ever actively watched it.
SCP-8210: I did. When I was a little kid, it would be on TV sometimes. One episode a week, and then you'd have to wait. Same bat-time, same bat- channel. SCP-8210 chuckles. I remember taking it so seriously. The drama, the dangerous traps, the villains, all of it felt very real and serious to me. I came back to it as an adult, and let me tell you, it's all so fucking stupid. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love that shit, but there's nothing serious about it.
It's stupid but in a funny way. Well, I guess I used to love it I should say. Once I started living it, it stopped being funny.
Dr. Harcroft: I see, I see. Let's get back on track. I have some more questions for you.
<The camera feed is lost for 0.5 seconds. When it resumes, Dr. Harcroft is now dressed in a full police uniform and sports dark aviator sunglasses and a thick mustache.> <Dr. Harcroft bangs his fists on the desk.> Dr. Harcroft: Who do you think you are, taking the law into your own hands?
You think you're better than us? You think you're tough? I bet you're not so tough under that mask.
SCP-8210: Jeez. I'm not even wearing… You know, I was really hoping this wouldn't happen.
<SCP-8210 stands up and approaches the door. Dr. Harcroft pulls out a police baton and blocks SCP-8210's exit. Dr. Harcroft swings the baton and misses, striking the table instead. The baton bounces off the table and hits Dr. Harcroft in the head, causing him to collapse. SCP-8210 shakes his head, pats down Dr. Harcroft, retrieves the Doctor’s ID, and exits the room.> <END LOG> Incident 8210-1: Initial Post-Recovery Escape <Security camera footage shows SCP-8210 exiting the interview room and slowly walking down a hallway. Lights flash and an alarm siren blares.
3SCP-8210 shakes his head as he continues walking down the hallway.> <SCP-8210 enters Site 230's cafeteria. 36 Foundation agents were present at the time.> SCP-8210: God-fucking-dammit. Are we cool, or does this have to be a whole thing?
<Foundation agents stand up, surround SCP-8210, and raise their fists.4One of the agents later identified as Bartholomew Rodriguez speaks.> Agent Rodriguez: We have you surrounded. It's over.
SCP-8210: We have you surrounded. It's over. Blah, blah, blah, whatever.
Let's just get this over with.
<Each agent approaches SCP-8210 one at a time to fight him while the rest engage in shadow boxing. SCP-8210 dispatches each agent with minimal effort.5> <An agent sporting full tactical body armor, later identified as Agent Laura Watson, kicks in the cafeteria door.> SCP-8210: Oh what now?
<Agent Watson draws a large hunting knife and performs a series of flips, cartwheels, and backflips toward SCP-8210.6Agent Watson stops approximately 3 meters away from SCP-8210. Agent Watson tosses the knife between her hands several times and performs a series of stylized slashes and stabs.> SCP-8210: Ugh. There's always one.
<Agent Watson makes multiple attempts to stab and slash SCP-8210.
SCP-8210 backpedals and narrowly avoids the attacks. Agent Watson slashes across SCP-8210's face, creating a small cut under SCP-8210's right cheek. A Single drop of blood rolls down SCP-8210's face, which he wipes off with his finger.> <SCP-8210 winces and recoils.> SCP-8210: Alright, you got your one good hit in.
<SCP-8210 clears his throat> It's my turn now.
<SCP-8210 uppercuts Agent Watson. This seems to stun her, and she stumbles back. SCP-8210 follows up with a series of slow, weak punches which nonetheless all connect. Agent Hernandez reacts as if the punches packed significant force. After a second uppercut, Agent Hernandez collapses to the floor.> <SCP-8210 spends the next 5 minutes removing Agent Watson's body armor and helmet and donning it himself. The armor is noticeably large for SCP-8210. SCP-8210 successfully exits Site 230 without raising the suspicions of any of the agents, doctors, and other site staff that he passes.> Addendum 8210-R: Recontainment Attempts Multiple attempts have been made at recontaining SCP-8210. The longest successful containment of SCP-8210 at present time is approximately 4 hours. Below is a summary of various attempts. Several have been left out in favor of highlighting unique attempts that best demonstrate the potential risks and difficulties associated with recontainment and long-term containment efforts.
SCP-8210 was successfully apprehended by Foundation agents and placed in a cell. During a brief glitch in the security camera observing the cell, it was transformed into a traditional barred cell as described previously in this document.
An agent slowly walked past while whistling, allowing SCP-8210 to grab the agent, slam his head against the bars, and retrieve a large brass key from the unconscious agent. SCP-8210 swapped clothes with the agent, bound and gagged him using the agent's undershirt and socks, and successfully exited the facility. The agent was discovered grunting through his gag approximately 2 hours later.
SCP-8210 was unable to be located on-site and security footage showed SCP-8210 walking around a corner and disappearing.
MTF Pi-1 "City Slickers" was dispatched to San Diego, California to recontain SCP-8210. Upon engaging with SCP-8210, MTF members had their clothing transformed into pinstripe suits and fedoras. Audio recordings indicate that the MTF members spoke with an exaggerated Bronx accent during this time.
SCP-8210 easily dispatched several MTF members after first asking if "this could be done another day". After the third MTF member was dispatched, one of the MTF members shouted, "Let's get outta here, boys!" prompting the remaining members to flee.
Agents lured SCP-8210 to an abandoned warehouse where they then planned to apprehend him. This attempt was disrupted by anomalous alterations to the warehouse and interference from an individual calling themself "The Embezzler".
The warehouse was transformed to include a maze, multiple large television screens with attached speakers featuring The Embezzler, and a Rube Goldberg machine that, upon completion, would have released a large collection of nickels, dimes, and pennies weighing a combined total of over 10 tons. Agents became trapped in the maze upon entering the warehouse and having the doors automatically shut and lock behind them. SCP-8210 successfully exited the maze and stopped the machine approximately 0.5 seconds prior to its completion.
SCP-8210 reportedly held out his hands and told agents, "You're welcome," before exiting the warehouse.7 SCP-8210 was successfully apprehended and contained at Site 230. During containment, Site Director Johnston had a conversation with Doctor Evelyn Grace regarding a reduction in Doctor Grace's salary. This incident is believed to have resembled a "damsel-in-distress" scenario and activated SCP-8210's anomalous ability. A more complete overview of Incident 8210-2 is available in this document.
• • • • Incident 8210-2: Security Log <Security camera footage shows the cell containing SCP-8210. A guard approaches the cell, looks through the glass window of the cell door and reacts with shock.> Guard: What? Where is he?
<The guard proceeds to open the cell and enter. Once the guard has reached the back of the cell, SCP-8210 steps out from the right corner behind the door. He calmly approaches the guard and karate-chops the back of the guard's neck. The guard collapses to the floor.> <Security cameras and audio recording devices sitewide experience simultaneous failure for 3.2 seconds. Upon resuming function, a majority of Site 230 and its personnel are unchanged with the exception of Director Johnston’s office and the surrounding area. Director Johnston is now dressed in a bulky red outfit, golden cape, a stylized black military general cap, and two large golden shoulder pauldrons resembling lions. Dr. Grace is now dressed in a blue blazer, blue dress pants, and a low-cut blouse. A name badge hanging around her neck identified her as Lucy Lebeaux, a reporter for the “Foundation Tribune”. All Foundation personnel within a 30-meter radius of the Director’s office are now clad in bulky red outfits matching Director Johnston’s.> <Several of the altered personnel entered the office and proceeded to tie up Dr. Grace with a large length of rope by running around her with it until it covers the length of her body.> Dr. Grace: You’ll never get away with this, Doctor Destruction.
Director Johnston: With an exaggerated German Accent I already have.
Oh, minions!
<Director Johnston snaps his fingers. One of the costumed Foundation personnel, henceforth referred to in this document as minions, produces a bandana and gags Dr. Grace. She is pushed out of the room and out of view of security cameras by several minions.> <Director Johnston returns to his desk and activates the PA system.> Director Johnston: Why, hello there SCP-8210, or shall I say, Max Mayfield? That's right, I know your secret identity. I take it that you are here to defeat me and to rescue your precious Lucy Lebeaux? Such a silly reporter, sticking her nose where it does not belong.
<SCP-8210 buries his face in his hands for several seconds.> SCP-8210: Aw, come on! I'm guessing I won't be able to leave unless I deal with you first. You can hear me, right?
Director Johnston: That's right, my little wunderkind. You are in my lair, the lair of Doctor Destruction. There shall be no escape this time. Muahahahaha!
Go, my minions. Destroy this dummkopf.
<SCP-8210 makes his way through the site while grumbling to himself. After 2 minutes, 4 members of site security reach SCP-8210 and point assault rifles at him.> SCP-8210: Are you guys yourselves? I really don't wanna fight anyone I don't have to.
<One of the guards, later identified as Security Officer Daniel Bronson, steps forward.> Officer Bronson: SCP-8210, cease all anomalous activity and return to your containment cell immediately.
SCP-8210: I can't control this. I guess you guys didn't know. I can't make this stop on a whim. If I could, then I would and this bullshit would never happen.
Whatever's happening, the only way I've ever made it stop is by playing out the scenario. Why don't you put those guns away and let me pass?
<The guards do not respond nor do they lower their weapons> SCP-8210: Look, I take it you guys have some serious stuff locked up here, right? Stuff that's way more dangerous than me? And I doubt having a supervillain on site is very helpful. Why don't you let me take care of this before this mess spirals out of control and something dangerous gets out?
<There are several seconds of silence during which none of the present individuals move.> Officer Bronson: Alright, but we are gonna be with you the whole time, and it's straight back to your cell after this.
SCP-8210: I wouldn't join me if I were you. Superheroes always work alone or with other superheroes, so it might mess things up. For all I know, I'm supposed to be giving a speech about working alone right now.
Officer Bronson: Who's to say we don't count as superheroes? Plus, we know where the Director's office is and can guide you there.
SCP-8210: You guys definitely are not superheroes. Look, there's no way I'm letting you shitheads come with me. The only way I've avoided getting myself and others seriously hurt is by playing by the rules of the genre. I don't make those rules. I just follow them, so sorry, not sorry, out of my way.
Officer Bronson: If we have to work within the genre, then maybe we're good to go. Every superhero has normal people who sometimes help them, and the help always comes after an argument where the superhero refuses help. Maybe this could be one of those situations where the story shows ordinary people can still make a difference. I think this fulfills those genre expectations.
<SCP-8210 throws his hands up in defeat.> SCP-8210: Dammit, fine. You win. Let's go.
<SCP-8210 and the 4 security officers make their way through the site toward Director Johnston's office. Ten minutes go by without any interactions with other personnel.> Officer Bronson: It's quiet. Too quiet.
<At that moment, the lights go out around SCP-8210 and the 4 security officers.> SCP-8210: You fucking idiot.
<The lights turn back on. SCP-8210 and the 4 security officers have been surrounded by 15 minions armed with assault rifles.> Minon 1: Drop the weapons.
<The 4 security officers slowly place their assault rifles on the floor.
SCP-8210 and the 4 security officers place their hands behind their heads while the minons retrieve the weapons. One of them pokes SCP-8210 in the back with his rifle.> Minon 13: Move it. The boss has a lot to say to you folks.
<SCP-8210 and the 4 security officers are led at gunpoint to Director Johnston's office. Once inside, a majority of minons exit, leaving behind only 2. Director Johnston is sitting behind his desk facing backward.> <Director Johnston slowly spins around his office chair to face them.> Director Johnston: I've been expecting you, SCP-8210.
<SCP-8210 shows high levels of frustration and attempts to pull his own hair out.> SCP-8210: Oh my fucking god, are you kidding me? That little spin thing was probably the most cliche thing that's happened to me since this all started.
Now, can we fight and get it over with, Doctor Destruction?
<Director Johnston wags his finger.> Director Johnston: Not so fast, mein little boy blunder.
<Director Johnston retrieves a large remote with an antenna and a single red button from beneath his desk. He gestures to his office window. Outside, Doctor Grace is tied up and hanging upside down over a pool of bubbling liquid.> Director Johnston: Let's not make any sudden moves, or else your precious Lucy Lebeaux dies.
SCP-8210: Jesus, fuck. Let me guess, boiling acid? When did that even get here? I mean, I've never met that woman in my life, but let's maybe not kill people, okay?
Director Johnston: Who are you to tell me what to do? You are my prisoner, SCP-8210.
<SCP-8210 turns around, grabs the 2 minons, and weakly shoves them.
Both minons are pushed much further than would be expected before collapsing.> SCP-8210: Alright, guys, let's arrest him or whatever and get this over with.
<Two of the security officers present retrieved the assault rifles from the minons. They point the rifles at SCP-8210. They each use one hand to rip off their suits, which are shown to be fake, velcroed pull-off outfits. All 4 are shown to have been wearing minion outfits underneath despite the minion outfits being substantially bulkier and larger than their outerwear.> Officer Bronson: Sorry, kid. Turns out the real trope was that your new allies secretly worked for the bad guy the whole time.
<Director Johnston pushes the button on his remote. Doctor Grace slowly lowers toward the boiling liquid.8 > Director Johnston: I warned you, and now you must face the consequences.
<SCP-8210 lunges at Director Johnston. One of the security officers fires at SCP-8210 and hits his torso. SCP-8210 falls to the ground.> SCP-8210: Oh sweet Jesus, oh fuck, that fucking hurts! God-dammit! You fucking shot me! What the fuck? I've never been hurt during one of these.
Oh, sweet Jesus, oh fuck, oh fuck.
<SCP-8210 tries to stand, but stumbles and falls. SCP-8210 attempts to stand again, and this time is successful.> Director Johnston: I admire the fight in you, SCP-8210. Most others would have given up. What keeps you going? Why do you still fight?
SCP-8210: Jesus-fucking-Christ, this hurts, but I gotta finish it.
<SCP-8210 holds up one finger as if to request Director Johnston waits.> Just give me a moment. Ah, fuck. I gotta make the speech, I'm just a little out of breath.
<SCP-8210 takes several deep inhales.> Okay, okay. I fight because I gotta, right? And I know I'll be fine because heroes always power through wounds like this and only collapse once they're safe and the fight's over. Maybe its the adrenaline from the gunshot, but I think I'm actually enjoying this for once. We gotta make the most out of life, right? Did that come out right? Aw, fuck it, who cares.
<SCP-8210 charges at Director Johnston, leaps over the desk, and tackles him to the floor. Agents fire at SCP-8210, but miss and instead shatter the office window. SCP-8210 grabs the remote from Director Johnston and throws it at one of the agents. The remote hits the agent in the head, causing him to collapse. SCP-8210 leaps out of the window while a second agent fires at him. The agent misses, but a stray bullet hits the rope holding up Dr.
Grace. The frayed rope manages to hold long enough for SCP-8210 to jump over the pool of boiling liquid, catching the falling Dr. Grace as he does so.> Dr. Grace: My hero.
SCP-8210: Whatever.
<SCP-8210 drops Dr. Grace on the floor. He looks down at his bloodstained shirt and feels around.> SCP-8210: Whaddaya know. Hey Lucy, what do you weigh?
<Dr. Grace giggles> Dr. Grace: Now, you can't ask a woman a question like that, lover boy.
SCP-8210: I, uh, yeah, I think that would be assault if I tried anything, but anyways.
<SCP-8210 bends over and picks up Dr. Grace with ease.> It's just that I've never been to a gym in my life.
<SCP-8210 drops Dr. Grace again. He proceeds to pat himself down around the location of his previous gunshot wound. Camera footage shows no sign of injury.> Dr. Grace: Will I ever see you again?
SCP-8210: I sure fucking hope not.
<SCP-8210 walks off and around a corner. Security cameras and audio recorders sitewide fail for 10 seconds. Upon resuming function, all anomalous changes from SCP-8210 appear to have reverted to normal.
SCP-8210 was no longer on site.> « SCP-8209 | SCP-8210 | SCP-8211 » Footnotes 1. For example, any injuries sustained during the alteration will remain.
2. Behavior exhibited by enemies and combatants in fiction where individuals act in a way that best serves the story and will allow the hero to stand a fair chance of succeeding. The most famous example is the set walking patterns of enemies in Super Mario.
3. Records show that no personnel nor automated system activated any alarms.
4. 14 agents present were confirmed to have firearms and/or nonlethal stunguns on them at the time. None of them chose to make use of them in any capacity.
5. All 36 agents were unconscious upon recovery, but none of them had sustained any injuries sufficient to cause loss of consciousness.
6. Agent Watson has not demonstrated this level of acrobatic talent before or after this incident.
7. Local businesses since the incident have reported small but statistically significant descrepencies in their quarterly revenue reports since this incident. "The Embezzler" has been labled as a potential Person of Interest and has not been apprehended at this time.
8. It is estimated that it would have taken approximately 30 minutes for her to reach the liquid at her rate of descent.
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