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If the Foundation is alerted to the presence of SCP-7698 while an OME is in progress, VMD operatives are to be dispatched to the area to halt the patronage of SCP-7698 under the guise of a health inspection for the duration of the OME. If alerted after the cessation of an OME, VMD operatives are to be dispatched to the area of former manifestation in order to identify and amnesthatize witnesses. Any individual who consumes any quantity of SCP-7698-2 is to be remotely monitored via Fly on the Wall Drones for the next 12 hours. Any witnesses present over the course of this period are to be treated with Class-A amnestics following the conclusion of the IME. All SCP-7698-4 instances present during an IME are to be intercepted1 before reaching SCP-7698 and brought to the nearest Foundation site for further study.
Standard Issue Searchbots2 are to alert the VMD of content containing keywords connected to SCP-7698 and identify the geographical origin of the IP address under which the content was posted. VMD operatives are to be dispatched to said location and apply amnestic treatment to related individuals as needed.
Description: SCP-7698 is an ice cream van measuring 5m in length and 2m in width and height. It is primarily white in color, with the word “AMONICE” written in red and blue letters on its front, back, and each side. There is an opening on its right side with a collapsible metal awning, behind which is a space resembling a typical food truck interior and populated by SCP-7698-1.
SCP-7698-1 is believed to be a single male humanoid, and will be referred to singularly hereafter, although the possibility of multiple identical instances has not been conclusively disproven. SCP-7698-1 has never been observed outside of SCP-7698.
SCP-7698-1 is caucasian, with black hair and brown eyes, and appears to be between 40-50 years old. SCP-7698-1 wears a white button-up shirt, a red apron, and a blue bowtie. The appearance of SCP-7698-1's lower body is unknown.
When asked, SCP-7698-1 claims to be named “Amon'' and to be the creator and sole proprietor of the Amonice business. SCP-7698-1 maintains a universally friendly and jovial demeanor during social interactions, regardless of the behavior exhibited by other parties. SCP-7698-1 will not acknowledge any mention of SCP-7698’s anomalous properties. Additionally, SCP-7698-1 will not acknowledge any injury sustained to its person and does not appear to perceive pain in any physical or psychological way.
SCP-7698-1 will maintain its baseline behavior up until sustaining a level of injury conducive to terminating non-anomalous humans, at which point it will expire, and SCP-7698 will demanifest prematurely. Injuries will be absent during subsequent appearances.
SCP-7698 can manifest anywhere within the continental United States, typically appearing in urban and suburban neighborhoods. It is unknown if these locations are selected by SCP-7698-1, as recorded statements suggest that SCP-7698-1 either does not remember or refuses to acknowledge previous manifestations. More than one instance of SCP-7698 has never been observed during a given time period, leading to the supposition that SCP-7698 is a singular vehicle. SCP-7698’s location/locations in multidimensional space during periods outside of manifestation are unknown.
SCP-7698 manifestations are categorized as either Output Manifestation Events (OMEs) or Intake Manifestation Events (IMEs). OMEs invariably occur on Saturdays or Sundays at exactly 12:00 p.m. in the timezone of manifestation. During an OME, SCP-7698, piloted by SCP-7698-1, will drive between 8-20 km/h through various streets, playing an instrumental version of the song “Turkey in the Straw” from a speaker on its roof, and stopping for any individuals encountered upon its route. Upon request, SCP-7698-1 will obtain various products from an unknown source below the base of SCP-7698's side opening, and will exchange said products for 0.99 USD. SCP-7698 ceases playing music at 12:30 PM, and will either demanifest shortly thereafter or once all customers present at that time have been served.
Adjacent to SCP-7698's side opening is a multicolored poster containing depictions of the 24 different products that can be purchased from SCP-7698-1 during an OME. The top of the poster reads "CEPHALOPOPS" written in red letters, below which is the phrase "They're Naked and They're Cold!" in blue italicized letters. The products depicted on this poster, designated SCP-7698-2A through SCP-7698-2X or SCP-7698-2 collectively, are quiescently frozen ice confections commonly referred to as ice pops or popsicles within SCP-7698's known range.
Depiction of SCP-7698-2A advertised on the side of SCP-7698 All SCP-7698-2 varieties are depicted as identical in shape, possessing a rounded top and four parallel rounded points jutting from its base3, and encasing a wooden tongue depressor meant to serve as a handle. The majority of SCP-7698-2's edible component is comprised of ice interspersed with artificial flavoring and coloring. Two spheres composed of grape-flavored bubble gum are partially embedded in the ice of SCP-7698-2, presumably meant to resemble eyes. Above these spheres, a complex abstract design is encased in the ice. This portion is composed primarily of saltwater taffy, although molecular imaging has identified trace amounts of seminal fluid within the substance. Based on genetic sequencing, the fluid is believed to originate from a currently unknown species of mollusk. The significance of the design, if any, is currently unknown, as SCP-7698-1 responds dismissively to any questions regarding the topic4.
SCP-7698-2 varieties primarily differ in the flavor of the ice and taffy components, as well as the layout of the taffy design. All SCP-7698-2 varieties possess flavors typically found in non-anomalous ice pops5. Each SCP-7698-2 variety has a name displayed below its depiction on the poster. These names are alliterative and consist of said variety's flavor followed by a common English name, such as Cherry Charlie and Lemon Lucy. Based on recorded statements, SCP-7698-1 seems to be under the impression that SCP-7698-2 instances depict characters that are widely known amongst the general public, and it has implied that each character has a distinct personality.
Any human who ingests over a certain proportion of an SCP-7698-2 instance6, hereafter designated SCP-7698-3, will experience several anomalous alterations to their anatomy and behavior over the following 8-10 hours, culminating in the creation of a single SCP-7698-4 instance.
Though their appearance varies between instances, SCP-7698-4 largely resemble ammonoid cephalopods. They are capable of hovering as high as 8m above the ground due to a network of ventricles containing hydrogen gas within their shells. They propel themselves through synchronized undulations of their 10 tentacles. Captured specimens live indefinitely without needing to eat, drink, or sleep, and exhibit no desire to engage in said activities. To date, no SCP-7698 instances have displayed behavior that would suggest sapience, but they do possess self-awareness and moderate emotional complexity, often behaving socially with both each other and standard humans. There are currently 211 SCP-7698-4 instances in containment.
Intake Manifestation Events occur in the same location as the previous Output Manifestation Event, transpiring approximately 11 hours after its cessation. By this time, most SCP-7698-3 instances resulting from the previous OME will have exited their place of residence by any means necessary and subsequently completed their transformation into SCP-7698-4 instances. During an IME, SCP-7698 travels along the same route as it did during the previous OME. SCP-7698 does not play music during an IME, instead emanating a 34-55kHz warbling noise7. SCP-7698-4 instances are attracted to this sound, and thus will congregate into a swarm trailing behind SCP-7698 as it travels.
Upon reaching the end of its original route, SCP-7698 will halt, and SCP-7698-1 will reach through SCP-7698’s side opening with an abnormally large butterfly net8, which it will use to capture any adjacent SCP-7698-4 instances using broad scooping motions.
Once all SCP-7698-4 instances in the immediate area have been retrieved, the net will be retracted, and SCP-7698 will demanifest.
Addendum 3834.1: Initial Specimen Report On 07/08/2016, at 17:44 EST, the Veil Maintenance Department received an automated security alert regarding an anomalous medical phenomenon located in ████████ General Hospital in ████████, New Jersey. The subject of said anomaly was a 12yo male named █████ ████, but will be referred to as SCP-7698-3.1 or “the subject” hereafter. Following this alert, SCP-7698-3.1 was covertly detained by Foundation operatives and escorted to Site-83 for further study. At the time of its initial arrival, the subject had undergone significant physical alterations that greatly inhibited its capacity for speech. However, the subject displayed no signs of mental impairment, and was thus able to understand and coherently respond to questioning when provided with a means of producing text. Upon preliminary interview, the subject described the purchase and consumption of an ice pop dubbed “Green-Apple Gary” from an ice-cream van labeled “Amonice”. It was through this interview that Foundation personnel were first informed of SCP-7698’s existence, although SCP-7698 itself was not encountered until 08/21/2016.
The following is a compilation of research documents derived from the ongoing case study of SCP-7698-3.1 and related/resultant anomalies, led by Senior Researcher Dr.
Leonard Owens. Included is a transcript of the Observation Logs recorded by Dr. Owens over a several-hour time span following SCP-7698-3.1’s acquisition. For the purposes of safety and security, the subject was fastened by the torso to a semi-erect standard hospital bed for the duration of the research process. Due to the inviability of verbal communication, a keyboard connected to a text-display monitor was provided, and the subject was instructed to record any notable subjective experiences through this medium. Dr. Owens observed SCP-7698-3.1 remotely during this time, utilizing live camera feeds from multiple angles and a two-way line of both auditory and typed communication. Transcriptions of SCP-7698-3.1’s messages have been presented in blue.
Preliminary Observations: The tongue of SCP-7698-3.1 has increased in width and height by approximately 500%, fully obstructing the mouth and preventing closure of the jaw. The tongue’s entire surface area is a light- green hue. Discoloration resembles staining caused by typical ice pop consumption, but cannot be removed through conventional means. Subject exhibits emotions and behaviors that would be expected of humans under such conditions. Cooperation with research personnel has been achieved through the promise of a cure9.
BEGIN LOG: 07/08/2016, 19:40:00 EST 19:40:01: SCP-7698-3.1 is transported into Observation Chamber B-19 by two assistant researchers. Subject’s eye expressions suggest worry.
19:40:32 Keyboard and display monitor are introduced to the subject. During this process, the subject starts to rub its hands against both of its cheeks while wincing.
19:41:14: Assistants exit the chamber. Subject begins to type with his right hand while continuing to rub its left cheek.
19:41:27: I have the worst brain freeze ever 19:41:43: I never understood why it’s called brain freeze, it's more like the roof of my mouth 19:41:58: I always hated it. Can you make it stop? Like with painkillers or something?
19:42:04: Dr. Owens verbally declines this request, but assures the subject that his ultimate intention is to negate these symptoms.
19:43:37: Skin on the left and right sides of the subject’s cranium begins to indent in certain areas, forming shallow crevices. Subject appears to be unaware of this, and continues cheek-rubbing behavior.
19:47:49: feeling light headed 19:48:08: also tongue is tingly 19:54:33: Ten adjacent papillae on the tip of the subject's tongue begin to enlarge and rearrange into a ring formation.
19:59:26: super dizzy 19:59:51: brain freeze getting better at least 20:01:43: Enlarged papillae begin to elongate.
20:02:12: mostly just tingles now 20:08:19: Cranial grooves coalesce into a distinct spiral pattern on each side of the subject’s head.
20:12:35: air feels thick 20:13:11: feels like water 20:13:44: feels like floating 20:14:50: Growth of 10 frontal papillae is arrested at approximately 25cm in length. The resulting structures resemble muscular tentacles. They have shifted into a ring formation upon the tip of the tongue. An indentation in the tongue develops in the center of said ring.
20:15:23: feel like floating 20:15:46: feel like foating 20:16:26: feel like floating 20:23:13 Tongue indentation has progressed into a spacious cavity connected to the tongue’s surface by a sphinctered orifice.
20:24:39: wait, I need to get to school 20:24:47: can we stop 20:24:54: Dr. Owens replies that it is Saturday, and the subject becomes visibly agitated.
20:25:16: but i have to get to schoool 20:25:27: supposed to meer up with freinds 20:25:35: Assuming these statements to be in reference to future school attendance, Dr. Owens begins to assure the subject that upcoming absences will be excused due to resulting from a medical emergency, but stops upon receiving the subject’s next message 20:26:04 no no np no need get to scool !
20:26:13: Subject’s fine motor coordination starts to rapidly deteriorate.
Enlarged frontal papillae begin to twitch at sporadic intervals.
20:26:22: gotta join yhe school 20:26:46: gota join the shool 20:27:29: gptt jpin th schol 20:27:53: Subject’s upper body vibrates forcefully. Two pustulant sores develop in parallel on the left and right sides of the subject’s tongue.
20:28:44: :cnt flot alne 20:29:37: fgh;lloiyttfhglppp;;;t 20:29:55: Further written communication is deemed inviable. Dr. Owens orders assistant researchers to remove the text display module and affix a Portable fMRI Complex10 to the subject.
20:30:23: Subject begins to violently spasm, hindering the fMRI’s attachment and activation process. Tongue sores rapidly swell in size while enlarged papillae twitch with increasing frequency and strength.
20:31:14: fMRI Complex is activated. Initial readings reveal several anatomical aberrations, including the permeation of the external spiraling grooves into the skull, pressurized gaseous pockets within the intracranial space, and severe damage to the cerebral cortex from the resulting compression. Neurological activity resembles that of a grand mal seizure.
20:32:06: Subject suddenly goes completely limp and ceases movement.
This is accompanied by fMRI readings indicating an abrupt transition into an entirely comatose state.
20:32:11: Dr. Owens orders the measurement of vital signs, prompting two assistants to retrieve heart-rate and BOL monitors.
20:33:23: As assistants are preparing the heart-rate and BOL monitors, neurological activity abruptly resumes, though it is relegated to the cerebellum and spinal cord. fMRI readings suggest that electrical impulses are emanating from the subject’s tongue and radiating through the central nervous system.
20:33:34: Lateral tongue sores simultaneously burst, expelling pus across the immediate area. Embedded within each former sore site is a complex eye with a violet iris and an oblong pupil. Enlarged papillae begin to move in full undulating motions.
20:33:39: Subject flails violently in what appears to be an attempt to escape its restraints. Several cracking sounds can be heard within the subject’s torso. Assistants move hectically around the chamber, appearing unsure of how to respond to the subject’s abrupt surge in activity.
20:33:45: Dr. Owens exits the remote observation room and enters the experimental chamber wielding a syringe containing an intravenous sedative.
Papillae undulations become synchronized and start to increase in frequency.
20:34:03: Sedative is administered into the subject’s right shoulder. Initially there is no noticeable effect.
20:34:46: Subject’s bodily movements start to slow and weaken, but the enlarged papillae continue to increase in speed.
20:34:57: Subject ceases thrashing and places both hands on the sides of its head.
20:35:00: Subject decapitates itself with an upward jerking motion. Its arms and body go limp immediately after this, but its detached head remains elevated, hovering about 2m above the ground. Enlarged papillae continue to undulate synchronously, propelling the head away from Dr. Owens and the assistant researchers, all of whom watch in motionless silence.
20:35:51: The subject’s head reaches the opposite wall and proceeds to bump into it repeatedly. Assistants look to Dr. Owens, who shrugs.
Observational study is concluded.
End Log Subsequent Research Findings: Following the conclusion of the transformation process, SCP-7698-3.1’s headless body displayed no vital functions. Post-mortem autopsy revealed several broken ribs and severe organ trauma, which is believed to be the result of the subject’s forceful thrashing against its restraints. The body decomposed at a typical rate and exhibited no anomalous properties.
To date, SCP-7698-3.1’s head, designated SCP-7698-4.1, remains alive and alert. The skin, cartilage, external cranial muscles, and original eyes decomposed at a typical rate, resulting in an exposed skull, while the tongue and brain displayed no signs of decay. SCP-7698-4.1 becomes visibly stressed when in the presence of Dr. Owens, often attempting to flee or hide from him. However, SCP-7698-4.1 exhibits no such aversion to other humans and is receptive to physical contact with personnel who it is familiar with. This led to the incidental discovery that scratching the former “chin” of SCP-7698-4.1 causes it to excrete a viscous stream of green-apple flavored saltwater taffy from the orifice between its tentacles. Similar properties have been observed in all subsequent SCP-7698-4 instances.
Footnotes 1. It is preferred that SCP-7698-4 instances be collected alive and without serious injury.
Biological-grade Remote Electrical Tranquilizers (BRETs) have been found to be more effective than chemical tranquilizers.
2. Comprise 75% of VMD-operated webwide programs, utilized for non-anomalous digital information.
3. SCP-7698-2 instances are often significantly misshapen compared to these depictions, possibly due to improper storage.
4. ”I don’t know, maybe a tattoo or something” verbatim is by far the most common response, although other responses have been elicited by asking in unconventional ways.
5. For a complete list of flavors, see supplementary document 7698.F.
6. The exact percentage necessary varies depending on the portions consumed and the height and weight of the individual.
7. This frequency range is inaudible to non-anomalous humans.
8. The netted portion is 2m in diameter. The maximum length of the shaft has not been determined.
9. Dishonest statement permitted under the Civilian Medical Anomalies clause of current Ethics Committee Guidelines.
10. A cranium-encasing network of magnetized metallic mesh capable of detecting and recording neurological activity within a user’s brain and upper nervous system in real time. This technology was first developed by Foundation personnel and has yet to be approved for public dissemination.
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