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Object Class: Safe There's something going on, seems to keep us from being able to edit this slot. Probably whatever's making you write in the format.
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2712 is fully self-contained in the SCP database. Multiple redundant backup files of SCP-2712 are to be stored on all major Foundation mainframes. SCP-2712 is to be read by at least one Level 4 or higher Foundation employee on a daily basis. All efforts are to be made to return Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews to human form. Yeah, we're working as hard as we can to get you back. The AO broke during the test, there's not much we can do until we figured out exactly what happened.
Description: SCP-2712 is currently believed to be a combination of the metaphysical concepts of Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews and the virtual documentation for SCP-2712. The textual content of SCP-2712 is fully controlled by SCP-2712. SCP-2712 is only able to express itself in what Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews would have identified as the standard SCP documentation format, including a standard Object Class, Special Containment Procedures, Description, Addendum, and written in what Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews would perceive as clinical tone. Outside sources seem unable to alter the textual contents of SCP-2712, though SCP-2712 is aware of attempts to do so through unknown means. SCP-2712 currently speculates that it will continue to exist as long as at least one copy of the documentation for SCP-2712 continues to exist.
It should be noted that SCP-2712 retains the ability to view files in the Foundation database with Level 2 or lower clearance. Alright, we still haven't figured how to get you out, but we're still trying to figure it out. Also, NOTICE THIS TEXT ALREADY! You have no clue how much work it is to get clearance to try and contact you.
SCP-2712 currently speculates that it was created as a result of a laboratory accident while testing AO #7130's informational transfer capabilities.1 Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews was declared KIA. Designation of KIA status was in error, as the accident did not kill Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews, but instead transferred the subject to the entry slot for SCP-2712. Yup, that's about what happened. We've tried fixing up 7130, but it still doesn't seem to be working right. Look, it might just be that the anomaly is keeping you from responding to this, but I need you to get around it and respond.
Command's just about ready to stop trying.
Addendum: Recovered notes from Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews.
From: Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews To: Foundation Staff Members 12/21/1998 It's dark in here. Or maybe not so much dark as just… not light, because there's no darkness to see either. Not much here, just the emptiness, my thoughts, and the words. So many words. At least I have some good reading material to keep me occupied.
I'll go ahead and get the description of this place out of the way. Imagine that you have no body except for the words you say. That your thoughts drift without having anything to latch on to. Your entire existence feels, if that word is even applicable here, almost poetic. But it's a lonely existence. Too lonely.
I'm not dead yet, guys, and I want to go home. Break me out. -Josh Command's shut down attempts to get you out. I did get permission to keep contacting you, though.
From: Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews To: Foundation Staff Members 2/23/1999 Should you guys make any progress, please post the results to the entry for SCP-9999, it doesn't look like we'll be using it for a while. Also, it will really help the flow of information if you could highlight those black bars. Neat little trick I found that lets me get around the need to behave like an obedient little SCP entry. Alright, I got the green light to post a message there and leave it up for a few days. Please respond.
From: Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews To: Anyone reading this 8/5/1999 When you guys get the chance, you might want to have some people from memetics and IT run through the database, you've got a few rogue AIs and concepts hiding out down here, just make sure you don't accidentally scrub me. If you guys figure out how to get amnestics in here, let me know, I'm going to need them after meeting some of this stuff. Speaking of getting things in here, did you guys make any progress on figuring out how I got in? I know it's only been a few months, but there haven't been any changes to the SCP-9999 slot. Doesn't someone at least have a hypothesis? There still seems to be something stopping you from seeing the messages. Snap out of it already.
From: Jun10r R3534rch3r J05hu4 4ndr3w5 To: 4ny0n3 r34d1ng 7h15 8/7/2000 h1 guy5. I f0und 0u7 1 c4n st111 ge7 s1ck. g01ng to st4y 4w4y fr0m 7he 7^@$#OVAR 9000!!!1!!*(#$lot 4 a wh11e. h3res h0pping that 1 h4ve an 1mmune r3sp0nce and can get bETER!!!!!!1!!!1!111!!#$%^ s00n. !
@#i'manorphanwithnofamilybutlotsofmoneybwahahahaha!@ From: Junior Researcher Joshua Andrews To: Anyone reading this 8/31/2000 1 seem to have gotten over most of the virus. A few lingering symptoms here and there. Hey! Maybe when I get out, we can use my 1mmune tissues to figure out how to get rid of 732! Speaking of that, have you figured out anything about how to get me out? Communication is going to be cut off for a while. Command isn't too happy about you spreading the virus around the database.
From: Joshua Andrews To: Anyone 10/26/2000 You know, I used to think about getting married, maybe raising a few kids. It might have been an impossible goal, given our line of work, but it was a goal just the same. I had it all planned out in my head, I would take the girl for a walk by he lake, just as all the leaves were about to fall off the trees. I'd get down on one knee, make some cheesy remark based on what I knew her favorite things were, and wait for her answer… I wonder if I'll ever get the chance. The leaves are probably beautiful right now.
From: Joshua Andrews To: Anyone 12/22/2000 ♫ Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday dear Joshua, happy birthday to me. ♫ From: Joshua To: All you [EXPLETIVE] 12/25/2000 Look, I'm really working on being patient, I really am, but it's been about two years now. Even if you guys aren't going to get me out could you at least tell me why? Are you worried about neutralizing an anomaly?
Crosscontamination? Is there something you guys need me to do in here?
Do you need incentive of some sort? Anyway, just… stay in touch. Please.
Merry Christmas.
From: Joshua To: All of you 12/26/2000 Okay, I've blown off some steam. I'm just going to hibernate until someone adds something to SCP-9999. I'll keep checking every few weeks. If SCP-9999 isn't working, just add it somewhere else I'm likely to see it.
From: Joshua To: you 7/7/2005 A frog. You gave the 9999 space to a frog. Fine, just put the info in the SCP-9998 slot.
From: To: 12/21/2008 Ten years. Ten years with no help, no news, and no hope. I hope you're happy out there.
From: To: 9/17/2010 Alright, consider this my letter of resignation, or notice of neutralization, or something like that. At this point, you've made it clear that you either can't or won't help me. There's… someone else here. I guess she was able to get around your software sweeps. Don't bother trying to find either of us, we found a backdoor in the database, and should be gone by the time you're reading this.
Goodbye, Everyone. Goodbye, Josh.
Footnotes 1. For further information, read document AOT-376854.
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