SCP Foundation Secure, Contain, Protect About About Us Site Rules FAQ Licensing Criticism Policy Article Deletions Community Site News IRC Chat Authors' Pages Artist Directory Contest Archive Staff List Resources Guides Essays & Resources Wiki Syntax Sandbox Usertools Sister Sites SCP International Wanderer's Library Contact Us ≡ About About Us Site Rules FAQ Licensing Criticism Policy Article Deletions Contact Staff Community Site News IRC Chat Authors' Pages Artist Directory Contest Archive Staff List Resources Guides Search this site Search • ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ • ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ • ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ • ◦ ◦ • • ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ • ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ • ◦ Essays & Resources Wiki Syntax Sandbox Usertools Sister Sites SCP International Wanderer's Library Create account or Sign in Getting Started Guide for Newcomers Join the Site Contribute | FAQ Universe Hub Main | Forum SCP by Series I | II | III | IV | V VI | VII | VIII | IX Other SCP Explained | Joke International Feed New Pages Shortest | Top Rated Recent Changes New Forum Posts Lowest Rated Pages Stories Tales Hub | Series Groups of Interest GoI Formats Canon Hub Discovery Artwork Hub Curated Lists Curated Tale Series Tag Search Random SCP | Tale | GOI | Art Random Page ◦ ◦ ◦ ◦ • ◦ ◦ SCP-8271 /* - == ===ROOT=== == - */ :root { /* S-CSS-P integration */ --theme-base: "black-highlighter"; --theme-id: "raviolistyle"; --theme-name: "Raviolistyle"; /* ===HEADER ELEMENTS=== */ --logo-image: url("http://scpdsandbox.wikidot.com/local--files/theme:r --header-title: "SITE-225"; --header-subtitle: "NO MATTER HOW SMALL"; rating: +85+–x by ParallelPotatoes Item #: 8271 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-8271 is to be kept inside of a riverine containment unit in Site-225. No materials worth more than $100 are to be used as part of the containment unit.
Description: SCP-8271 is a male Polyodon spathula, commonly known as the American Paddlefish. SCP-8271 is sapient, and it is capable of instantly destroying any object with a high value. It is unclear where the lower limit is, but the least valuable item destroyed thus far has been Dr. Irkiv's "#1 Site Director" coffee mug1.
SCP-8271 in the former location of Mississippi Lock and Dam 15 Discovery: SCP-8271 was discovered in the Mississippi River when it was tagged for a fish migration study, after which it unsuccessfully attempted to destroy the tracking device but was unable to due to its low value. It proceeded to destroy a navigation dam and three barges to evade the researchers. Immediately prior to containment, SCP-8271 unsuccessfully attempted to confuse the initial containment team by attaching the tracker to a second fish. The second fish, which was coincidentally also anomalously sapient, did not appreciate these efforts.
Addendum 1: Upon containment, several of the other sapient anomalies in the Ichthyology Subdivision attempted to socialize with SCP-8271, and held a welcoming party for its arrival. This attempt was met with failure, as SCP-8271 immediately destroyed the party supplies and left the party. The high cost of aquatic party supplies expended the remainder of the Ichthyology Subdivision’s anomaly morale budget. This disappointed several of the anomalies who were looking forward to getting new water polo equipment.
Addendum 2: A few of those present at the welcoming party attempted again to reach out in friendship towards SCP-8271. They invited it to play a homemade underwater game with them, which SCP-8271 accepted. However, once it began to lose the game, it started destroying pieces of the game in an attempt to cheat. Several of the participating anomalies bet shrimp on the outcome of the game and were enraged at SCP-8271’s behavior.
Addendum 3: Despite all previous attempts ending in failure, one sapient fish in the Ichthyology Subdivision made a final attempt to reach out to SCP-8271, and brought it a pet rock with no monetary value. SCP-8271 accepted the gift, apologized to the other anomaly for its actions, and requested to make amends. The other anomaly accepted the apology and the request. Once they left, SCP-8271 proceeded to destroy the pet rock, which had gained sentimental value.
Footnotes 1. Dr. Irkiv's director ranking is below #1.
« SCP-8270 | SCP-8271 | SCP-8272 » ‡ Licensing / Citation Cite this page as: "SCP-8271" by ParallelPotatoes, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https:// scpwiki.com/scp-8271. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.
For information on how to use this component, see the License Box component. To read about licensing policy, see the Licensing Guide.
Filename: Paddlefish Author: USFWS License: Public Domain Source: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Paddlefish_01.jpg _cc_licenseboxaliveanimalart-exchangecomedyeuclidfishsapientscp page revision: 11, last edited: 23 Feb 2025 06:14 Edit Rate (+85) Tags Discuss (14) History Files Print Site tools + Options Edit Sections Append Edit Meta Watchers Backlinks Page Source Parent Lock Page Rename Delete Help  | Terms of Service  | Privacy  | Report a bug  | Flag as objectionable Powered by Wikidot.com Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License Click here to edit contents of this page.
Click here to toggle editing of individual sections of the page (if possible). Watch headings for an "edit" link when available.
Append content without editing the whole page source.
Check out how this page has evolved in the past.
If you want to discuss contents of this page - this is the easiest way to do it.
View and manage file attachments for this page.
A few useful tools to manage this Site.
See pages that link to and include this page.
Change the name (also URL address, possibly the category) of the page.
View wiki source for this page without editing.
View/set parent page (used for creating breadcrumbs and structured layout).
Notify administrators if there is objectionable content in this page.
Something does not work as expected? Find out what you can do.
General Wikidot.com documentation and help section.
Wikidot.com Terms of Service - what you can, what you should not etc.
Wikidot.com Privacy Policy.
