“Hey now, Princess Celestia is very warm, very comfortable. She’s also  remarkably soft. I’m here because the Princesses found me in the castle, half dead, half not dead, with half of a spear stuck in my neck. They were nice enough to start nursing me back to health after I agreed to share every bit of information on my Queen, who decided it would be a good idea to try and blow up Canterlot. Then I get to live under the Princesses’ servitude until I die, for my crimes against Equestria, so that I don’t get sent to Tartarus. Right now, I’m on a lunch break, so I get to cuddle with your gracious ruler!” I nuzzled the Princess, which made her flinch slightly.